Pornography is definitely a thing in our current society and it's something that you don't have to search for too much or take a test to have it. You don't even have to pay for it, as the internet is full of it and accessible to anyone. Under or over 18. You just have to click "over 18" and you're in. In one tempting, but painful world. Painful for both the actors, but the viewers also, despite being advertised as "only pleasure in here" by colorful lights and 4K labeling.
Important note that I wish to pin in the article from the very beginning of it: Nudity is not considered pornography, by me and some others also, so let's not confuse them and mix them in the same boiling pot. It's about those short clips that we get from pornhub, brazzers and many others that I am referring to.
Yesterday, when jumping from one video to another, on youtube, I stumbled upon a confession of one of the most successful male porn-stars who just a few years ago quit this "pleasant job" and told his story behind the curtain. How he got into the porn industry is obviously related to the big money that flows into it, but how he got out of it is a complete different thing. Not only that he almost always felt that he is a male prostitute when doing porn, but he begun suffering a lot by being a porn actor and that's what made him quit the job. It wasn't a physical suffering, as back pain or something else, but it was more like a soul's pain. Something that sometimes hurts more than the back or other physical pain. Something that no one could imagine as triggered by sex.
He told in his interview that for years he was spinning in a circle of "acting" for money to buy drugs that would take his pain away and that the more he acted the more he needed drugs to cover that pain. All this happened until one day when he pulled the car over, after driving from filming for a movie, and started crying. Yes, a male porn actor crying in his car. Something that not too many of us would imagine. This mix of pain covered in drugs wasn't bearable anymore and something needed to happen. And so it did. He quit his porn star career and got out of the vicious circle that drained him of life and isolated him in a world that he no longer desired.
He's not the only one, unfortunately, in this situation, as according to a study, 89% of the female actresses from the porn industry would get out of it, but they don't have "other qualification" to sustain their living. Pornography not only affects the actors, as it may seem, but consumers also. Both males and females. In the case of males one of the most destructive side effect of it, in my opinion, is masturbating after watching porn. A habit that not only affects the quality of the sperm, the overall energy levels and testosterone levels of a man, but it affects also the way one interacts with women, the way he has sex and sees intimate relationships. Love has nothing to do with porn and very often addicted porn watchers and actors are not anymore able to feel and express love.
Pornography can be helpful when you're a teenager and you need to learn "some skills" before actually having a sex life, but once you're at "the wheel" of your own, it may only destruct it than help. According to the same study mentioned above, 41% of the families where one member watches porn regularly are having their sex life affected by this habit. One of the down sides of it being that one of the partners feels less attractive due to their partners "comparison standards" acquired from regularly watching pornography. So, the question that might arose now is why do I consider pornography painful?
It's because, in my opinion, is a form of prostitution where sex is made possible between two partners, that probably wouldn't sexually interact "in real life", only due to the money being paid to both of the sides. It's making out of sex a "plastic experience" that has no love involved also transforming women into sexual objects and deteriorating the way men approach them. Also in the case of the consumers it definitely affects their physical health, mental health and sex life. All of that, of course, excluding violent porn, underage porn and other kind of garbage videos that might enter the category. I was only taking in consideration "the quality ones" that most of us have access to them. So, as a conclusion, it is as painful as one can only imagine, although there's only pleasure that most of us see in it and probably all of that is due to that high quantities of dopamine, resulted from watching those movies, that keeps the industry alive and prospering. But it's not all about pleasure in the world of porn, if it's still any left nowadays.
Thanks for your attention,
Ace
A well-thought out article. Yes, I can easily believe a porn career can be a problem for many porn actors. As a career, it is so unusual that the average person probably has a lot of difficulty imagining its effects on the psyche in the long run. I imagine that computer-generated porn imagery and film will be a big industry in the future with AI-powered interactivity built in.
I suppose it's easy to become addicted to porn. It's definitely easier than to become addicted to sex as sex (with attractive partners) is much harder to get. But you may ask yourself how relationships with women are much better these days. Divorce, parental alienation, venereal diseases and unwanted pregnancies are rampant these days and are some of the things you can avoid completely by abstaining from sex and relationships. That is a very hard thing to do for most young men, though. That's why it's remarkable that in Japan between a half and a third of young men demonstrate no willingness to enter into romantic relationships with women. (The grass-eating men phenomenon.)
Love is a real thing. But it's also a reality that a woman's love for a man is informed by whether or not said man has resources and whether or not she has access to them. And a man's erotic love for a woman is controlled by how attractive he finds her (it's a combination of mainly her looks and how receptive she is to him). In reality, the inner workings of (erotic) love are quite mechanical which is why most people are prepared to take great pains to avoid facing that reality. Love is typically finite and towards the end it can get quite ugly. The problem is exacerbated by the fact that in adulthood the main source of loving acceptance that often seems available to us is our romantic partners. This is tragic as that love comes with so many more conditions than the love of our parents showered to us when we were children.
I think the kind of person who has the best chances of happiness in life is one who does not require or want much from other people. Such human minds are rare as the carriers of genes for such independence do not reproduce as effectively as others. But nature never cared about our happiness. If you are one of those blessed souls, I would highly recommend not following your cultural programming to enter into relationships. By knowing yourself and choosing another path you can avoid a great deal of suffering.
That thing might save some future human actors from the downsides of being a porn actor, but porn will still exist for many years to come so the viewers are still exposed to what I pointed out in the post. On the celibacy point of view that you expressed in your comment I can agree that for some people might come in hand, but only a few. Not too many of us are willing to live such a life.
Thanks for your in depth comment by the way. It added a lot of value to the post.
Yessir I agree! Porn is terrible I think it’s degrading to watch and no real man should. I had not idea how bad porn had effected my life until I stopped watching it completely. Do yourself a favor and don’t watch porn!
Same as with cigarettes. You can't feel the fresh air until you quit them.
Your statement helps me as I am trying to quit