A few years ago, I wrote an article on my long-distance relationship with a foreign girl for a local website.
It went viral almost instantly.
It had thousands of shares on Facebook. My friends were texting me and telling me they read it and how their own friends were asking them if it was indeed me who wrote it. Heck, even my own aunt, for the first time ever, texted me to say how cool I was.
That said though, virality also came with hate.
The article gathered a lot of hateful comments, from both trolls and people who disagreed with it completely. I know not the real reason why it irked them so much for I usually choose to never address any form of negativity when it comes to my writing.
I remember a friend sending me a link where the article was talked about in a forum. On a whim, I went to check it out. I remember reading a comment stating that I wrote the article because I was an "insecure loser."
I won't lie, it stung a little. Getting viral through controversy can be rather daunting.
But here's what happened the following week: Nothing.
Absolutely nothing happened.
Nobody gave a flying fuck anymore and nobody was talking about it.
I was back in the shadows. None of my friends viewed me as that writer who was attached to that article.
Negativity, hateful comments, criticism and how others think of you
Trying to learn how to not care about what others think is a hot topic today. It's a coveted prize where when gifted upon your soul, you can live life to the fullest; according to your own terms, supposedly.
But in my opinion, that's just too extreme.
We need to care about what others think. To not do so completely would entail being selfish, self-indulgent, rude and downright obnoxious. Needless to say, a person who doesn't care about others think all the time plain lacks social skills.
You simply need a balance and that balance is attained by sifting out the hate, anger and trolling from others.
How to deal with hateful comments and angry people
1) Always remember that no one really cares about you
They don't. No one really has a specific agenda with your name inside. Nobody wakes up thinking, "I want to make [your name]'s life a living hell today."
Everyone has their own shit to worry about everyday, and it will keep piling up.
You may be thinking, "But he/she is bullying me non-stop!"
That is merely an illusion at that moment. That illusion doesn't last for the moment itself doesn't last, certainly not in your bully's life. Once your bully is gassed out, they will move on to find something else to be pissed off about, take note of this.
2) Angry people are angry with everything
Not just you, your viral article, your comment, your opinion or even the way you look. Angry people are pissed off as hell with everything around them.
This means they're already living in their own hell. You need not add to it. Flinging another grenade into the pile will make the noise louder and may potentially hurt yourself or others only.
Let them crawl out of their own hell. They need to.
3) Simply hit 'Delete' for assholes do not apologize
It's a paradox that pulls us in. We humans are drawn to drama, negativity and hate, especially when it has something to do with you. The human in you would feel that you must absolutely do something about it to turn wrong into a right.
No, not really. Some things are better left ignored. Some things deserve to be eradicated from your life forever.
Hit 'Delete' and move on. You'll never get that apology from an asshole; an angry person. They only want blood and they wish it flows out from your orifices on its own. Why on its own? Hateful people are innately cowards. They're not brandishing swords or knives. They're shouting and hoping you bleed from that somehow. (Psychopaths are the ones who are armed. That's another topic altogether.)
I personally stop addressing comments on my own blog anymore. It honestly results in nothing.
4) Watch a bunch of videos depicting angry people getting in trouble
This point may be a little controversial and trigger warning-ish, but I find it can be helpful for the sole idea that you need to see angry people for who they really are, and that is the barbarian manifesting outwardly via their behavior, sometimes even in public.
I've anger issues myself. I ruminate and think of beating my wrongdoers up. But whenever I stumble upon some video on Facebook showing a raw fight between two hoodlums or drunkards, I breathe a major sigh of relief and as I think, "Wow! Is that how I look like if I really get into a fight? Thank goodness I am still sane and not in prison."
When an angry person dishes out some hate unto you, they're not winning. They're not letting loose their agenda on you. They're also not engaging in a personal battle where their entire life's story is finally told to the world to be validated.
They're just acting and looking like baboons, most of which will be thrown into captivity.
Always remind yourself that you're better than that. You don't need to act like that for doing so means throwing away your values. And in today's day and age where technological virality can catch you from a hidden camera, the consequences are simply never worth it.
5) Angry people know how to move on
The ironic thing is, their moving on means finding something new, hot and trendy to be angry about.
I don't want to elaborate on this. But let's put it this way: If they can move on, so can you.
www.Alden-Tan.com
Follow me here on Steemit! @aldentan
Support my work here on Patreon if you like my writing. Peace!
Upvote, resteem and comment ya?
5 - Angry people know how to move on
The ironic thing is, their moving on means finding something new, hot and trendy to be angry about.
---- That's what bothers me the most, is that while I sit and think and analyze the situation, and have seen it from all angles... They have already forgotten and moved on. They just come swooping on in, mess with your head, and could care less anymore. For once, I would like to actually change an angry or ignorant person so they truly understand the other side of the table and make a positive change in their ways. Just my opinion.
Well remember that they're already in their own hell.
They swooped in and out, and still feeling all the pain and anger. That's ugly.
Agreed, but they don't know they are in their own hell... I want them to know. Cause then that person and I can work on being constructive together if they know.
I know what you mean. From experience, you just gonna have to let it go. Imagining scenarios of them getting hurt will never help. That's why you gotta focus inwards and do your own shit instead.
Nice post man. I think it's pretty amazing to experience something like that. I also understand where you're coming from. That's pretty hectic.
That's why I have a simple rule: F*CK THE HATERS!
Check them out, and dust them off. They mean nothing LOL. You , and only you can have an opinion for the things that happen to you!
Talk soon.
Yep. And my was just locally viral. Think of the world and bigger websites. Think about it.
Nobody gives a shit next week unless the media decides to extend it.
Peace bro.
Very informative post. Thank you for sharing this. I have been having a hard time dealing with hateful comments and angry people during these past few days. Looking forward to see more of your works.
Thank you. Just let it go. They're just words.
Thanks for voting
just ignore them is always the best option in my opinion.
Indeed, but that cliche is easier said than done, so I thought I'd try to expand it.
Great advice.
Reacting to the barbs just makes you their puppet.
Cut the strings and let their rage echo back unabsorbed.
Not even strings. Just stay far, far away.
People will always hate on things that are even slightly different to what they think. I usually ignore it and just enjoy what I do.
Yes, and it's always usually out of ear imo.
Hi steemit friends! I have seen your post, I like your posts I will support you% 100 in steemit. do not forget follow me and upvoted me, lets help each other :)