Hello everyone again! (I think it's time for me to come up with a new way of saying hello to you, and then every day the same thing, it's boring months to do the same thing).
You know, I promised myself that I would write about men and women once a week. But I have so many thoughts coming after the written article that, it seems, if I do not share all this with you, my female and restless brain
just explode. Therefore, I will continue yesterday's topic today.
Yesterday we talked about gifts (thanks for the stories and comments you shared!). Today I want to talk about them quite the other side. Many women pretend that they do not need gifts, as one woman put it: "I'm not selling to accept gifts" (everyone really has their own cockroaches).
Due to the fact that many women give gifts a sense of duty. Or maybe because there is a widespread opinion in modern society that accepting a gift means being mercantile, many women have accepted the position: "I can do everything myself, do not strain, dear."
The Russian-speaking space is very different from all of Europe. In the sense that people live very differently, in Europe, feminism in society takes other, higher positions. I really liked the idea of my coach. He looked at the presents in terms of history.
If we go back to the previous article, we can to hear my idea that a gift is a certain symbol. So we (women) can understand that a man is willing to take care of us and is ready to share with us what he has. He is ready to to protect us, because the woman is evolutionarily arranged so that she is looking for certain protection in order can to raise children. (Because human children cannot grow in 3 weeks, as, for example, it happens in cats.) No, people are much more complex organisms, so more time is needed to grow and grow stronger).
And if we look at what happened in history, we can understand that the last many centuries, there have so many wars in our territories. Yes, in Europe, too, they were. But this cannot be compared with what happened in our Russian-speaking space. And we already in education laid out that life is unsafe. Especially if grandparents, great-grandparents, great-grandfathers take part in the upbringing of children. There is nothing wrong with this, it's just that way, it just happened.
And when a girl / woman has an inner need to feel this care from a man, and she tells herself that: "No, I do not need anything like that. I'm not mercantile, my grandmother said that I should do everything myself, because you can stay alone. I myself can cope "she will feel bad. Or, let's say, when a girl is just pleased to receive gifts, she feel just comfortable, good, cool but, no, you can not, in any case. Because it is mercantile !!!
I really know such stories from the lives of my friends. It sounds like I'm blowing an elephant out of a fly, but these are all really real stories. If the girl has this inner need, but she has heard a very important opinion from the side and decided that "she will be a good girl," then in that case, she atert to have problems with herself. Because there is an inner need, but you cannot satisfy it, because "I'm good". It sounds like this.
I know story when a woman went against her beliefs and eventually washed her hands. Perhaps you know about this phenomenon. Washing hands symbolizes cleansing. Only in this case it is already pathological. Women could wash their hands literally up to grazes, wounds and so on. That is, a simple conviction, which already leads her in a state of dissatisfaction (which already affects the thinking of a person), also brought her the feeling of a fallen woman and reflected on her physical condition.
You know, sometimes I remember such cases and I understand that it's crazy ...
I think that the best thing a person can do is simply to accept one's desires and needs. It's just honest to confess to them, and not to deceive oneself.
I*** believe that the most important thing is to be honest with yourself.*** You know, sometimes I understand that I have to be honest with people around. It is not always necessary. For example, I already told. That I do not always share my conflicting opinions with people, because I do not want to spoil relations with people. But in fact, people very often negatively perceive what does not fit in their head or contradicts their beliefs. So that's it. But being honest with yourself is very important! Very important!
When we take in ourselves what is ugly, then, first - we begin to love and respect ourselves more. The second is
our life becomes more comfortable. Third, only after we have accepted something that does not suit us, we can change it.
Therefore, I again came to the conclusion that you need to be honest with yourself. And there already we'll see :).
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:)