Cross-posted from my personal blog

I wanted to kind of clean up the Twitter account a bit. I clearly tweet way too often…and it says I am at what, 38k of tweets? When most people are batting under a thousand? Well, unless they are a celebrity.

So I googled up some “Free tool to mass delete tweets, 2018.”.. and when I put this in, many pages of “free ads” .. but nothing legit. All wanted money. You would not know however, unless you logged into the tool, tried to delete..and then it comes up saying “Oh hai, we want some monies off you for deleting your shit.”

Really? You’re going to charge me to be this pretty little housemaid. Wow. Kind of offended, to be honest. When you say on your website that “Your tool is free” .. keep to this verbiage. I understand that putting together a tool is a pain in the arse, but be honest. It’s frustrating beyond repair to have to jump through hoops, just to find out that your site is nonsense.

Anywho..when I do have a few dollars to spare, I will be paying for one of these tools. It’s just much more simple than you know, sitting through 38 thousand tweets and deleting.

I also went through my posts on here, and put them away. I do this sometimes… It just cleans things up, and doesn’t clog up the blog.

I’ve also noticed in the past few days, that my energy is just all over the place. I don’t know why, but it is. I am also keeping super close to the diet I had before the surgery. I know, several days following the surgery, we’d been eating garbage food. I know. But in the past few weeks, it’s been much healthier. I don’t want to put on any weight or try not to. Walking will be my biggest exercise… once back, I have to go around construction.. The City of Victoria likes to make it incredibly difficult for pedestrians to get anywhere. Each year, they tear the shit out of any sidewalk, roadway, or anything they deem is needing “rebuilt”.. When half the time it’s a bunch of bullshit.

So when I go back, I will have to take longer routes to get from point A to point B. No skin off my nose, as I’d rather walk and make sure I am healthier than before. I don’t want to push things, nor do I want another surgery unless I absolutely need to. I want to build up, not build down. We’ll see how things go. In the meantime, i have to plan around the stupid construction.

I also want to work on building back into swimming, longer walks, going out places as well. I have been stuck in the house for so long, it’s driving me batty! But, I had to make sure I was okay to do things first. I mean, being in bed still hurts. Waking up and sitting up kind of hurts. So not entirely sure just yet when this will happen. But hurting or not. I need to be up and at them at the 13th. Gotta get my life back in gear.

Also need to figure out how to turn messanger off when I am at you-know-where. People can reach me through text, or not at all. I find when I am trying to do my own thing, this is when I am messaged the most. In bed? Send me a 100 messages. I am doing what I do? Fuck, you need 100 more. In the shower? Send more!!! Playing WoW! Well, I need your attention x100. So it’s difficult to focus sometimes. I mean, I understand the need to tell me when your kids did something cute and all..or you got a new tattoo…or someone did something silly… or you need to ask me to google shit you can’t seem to… But there has to be like a I don’t know, a boundary. People know when I am doing what I do, but they insist I can handle shit when I am there. They know when I am on WoW, but they still want me to figure out their life’s problems. I can’t do that. I can’t focus on everyone else’s issues and my own at the same time.. I am here, I will listen and respond as much as I can. I just can’t put energy into life when I am trying to do other things. If that makes sense?

I don’t know what it is. it seems to frustrate the living shit out of people..when you don’t respond to them right-this-second. They send a little 5 word message, and expect instant gratification.NOW I know I have been like this myself in a few instances. Depending of course what the situation is. However, I can go my entire day without responding, or being responded to? That’s fine by me. I don’t honestly care. I don’t know if it’s just me trying to focus on the day, or what. But others, if you don’t respond right away? It’s like they think you’re angry, ignoring them, pissed off, wanting to call off your friendship. I don’t understand the need/want for instant gratification. I mean it’s nice and all that you need a online hug because xyz happened, but can it wait until I am not doing what I do? I don’t understand.

The other thing too which irks me. When someone is wanting attention when you’re busy. I do not mean my kids either. No. What I mean, is when you’re playing a game. You’ve had a shit show of a day, and you need to just beat the shit out of something online right? You go into the game, you’re in that mindset and booom! 100 messages. You ignore the first 80 of them, because the boss you’re killing needs to be beaten, right? Then if you don’t respond, more come. Your phone lights up, beeps, vibrates. So you finally message back? Guess what happens? “Oh im busy I will talk to you later..” The fuck? So you interrupt me from what I was doing, then decide to brush me off. Wow. I like, I don’t understand how people can do that. If you neeeeed my attention, just say so. Don’t blow me off because I didn’t instantly respond.

Now I have several friends who I apologize to. They are on a different time zone, they respond to me. I apologize because I didn’t respond right away. They tell me over and over again not to worry about it. Cool, okay thanks! I just, I am kind of in shock. People tell me not to apologize. It’s the ones who constantly need your attention, that expect you to apologize over and over, because you couldn’t wake up fast enough.

I mean I absolutely love being there for people. I love hearing everything. Just sometimes it wears me out, to the point where I tune the world out sometimes. I’ll turn my phone off, play WoW, and not give a shit. I won’t be doing that tonight however, because my daughter is out with friends…and I need to make sure she’s okay. But other than that, sure.

i am not complaining either. I am just observing from life as to how technology has changed people. I mean I was thinking about several years ago. Like even ten years ago. You’d get a phone call or a text from friends you hadn’t heard from in ages. You’d call them, enjoy the discussion and move ahead. No big deal right? You may not hear from them for months, even a year? But the friendship wouldn’t dissolve because of it.

Nowadays if you don’t respond to people within 5 minutes, they lose their shit. i mean have you noticed this? I sure have. People need that instant “Oh wow she caaaares!” feeling. It’s so bloody weird.

I’m still like this now. If I don’t hear from you for months, no biggies. We talk, we catch up – no big deal. It’s not a thing to me, if you don’t respond right away. My Life isn’t exactly you know, something interesting? XD

Oh, and to top it off? I am completely ennjoying the cooler weather outside right now. This whole surgery-thyroid thing has tossed my body into a “I hate you sun!” and it’s been difficult this summer, let me tell you. Hopefully next year the summer won’t suck as many balls as it doesn’t right now, for me.

I keep looking up in my room, where some of my tsumtsums sit. I keep thinking, wow shit. I haven’t collected these in a long ass time. I mean I have some sitting in my closet collecting dust I’ll be honest. It’s just it was a neat thing to collect years ago. I still pick up like Halloween ones and such, but honest? it’s not been a thing for me in a long assed time. They are still rather cute though. I just haven’t had the time or the energy to track down collections, or new ones, or pricing. Meh. It’s neat though. The game is still very much around and being played. I just, I still collect my Stitches (well is that not clear as mud..) but it’s just not a huge thing anymore.

The Pop Collection is ones I want to collect… but honest? I have to keep an eye on the space in my little space of this house. haha!

My son is going over to Vancouver for a bit in August/September. Cool on him. I think he needs that every now and again, just to stretch his wings a tad, and go visit his friends. He doesn’t plan on being gone as long as he usually is…but he needs to have a break. He originally wanted to go in June, but because of me, he stayed put.

The girls are going back to school soon (a month!) …and I’ve got to put the back to school stuff in gear. New outfits, shoes, bags etc. No bags with ears though. Nope, not this time around. The ears do not last!

I am crossing every thing that I can cross, that NKOTB come to Vancouver this tour. They haven’t given a set tour list yet, but last time sadly was only Toronto. Many celebs have been doing this as of late, and nobody knows the reason ? It sucks! 😛

I want to eventually get more memory for my machine, and a new video card. I also need new speakers, and a new hard drive for the kids machine. We’ll see. I also need clothes and other stuff, but let’s not go there for now.

I want to go over to Vancouver for a weekend as well. I just want to wander the seawall and walk. Just walk. Have my headphones on and have a blast! But, you know… we’ll see how that goes. I know I will go over for my birthday if I can’t make Seattle. Just for a day or something. We’ll see how that goes, I suppose.

So many things I want right now. Like it’s funny but not funny. My son thinks we should get a car, I said no. Not right now. I mean I have other things to pay, I can’t really keep up with insurance and gas… and upkeep. Maybe in the future? We’ll see I suppose.

Okay I am getting off this thing.