8 reasons why an honors pupil at school is not an excellent student in life.
Any parent is pleased with the child's achievements. It's nice when a son or daughter copes with school assignments and receives teacher approval on a regular basis. Some parents get used to it. And it seems to others that being an excellent student is a child's direct responsibility. They continue to crush, even when he loses interest in an object.
But is it so good to receive one of the five and diligently learn the lessons?
We made a list of explanations, why to be an excellent student at school is not equal to being successful in life. And found the reasons why the requirement of a child of one of the fives can lead to very depressing consequences.
- Will spoil the health
If the child has time to study well, play sports and communicate with peers, then everything is fine. But in the real world, many children experience great stress. Quite often the child's work is limited to one school. Often parents add to this the lessons of music, English and other additional circles. Plus the duties of the house.
In an attempt to grow a genius from a heir, the parents do not take into account the possibilities of his organism. Often indifferent to physical exertion, unless the child himself is not interested in them. Apparently, therefore, more and more children in the world are overweight, and spend their free time at the computer to disconnect from reality. However, the child's physical and mental health is as important as the intellect: they need to be developed and protected in order to grow a full-fledged personality.
- It will not learn to correctly prioritize
What is more important: get the five in all subjects in a quarter or dilute the assessments by the four, but prepare for an important conference that will help you enter the university? The answer, it would seem, is obvious. But not for those who are used to studying perfectly. In high school, it is still more important for such children to receive the approval of teachers and parents than to choose what will help them to take place in adulthood.
Good grades are good. But it is more important to teach the child not to mechanically cram the material, but to orient in real life and determine what will actually be useful for him.
- Do not learn to motivate yourself
It may seem that the best students are the most motivated children. But it is not always the case. Many people, from an early age, because of the pressure of their parents, have the skill to learn well and do their homework on time. In high school, these children continue to study diligently, but avoid other activities where they need to control themselves. Others are motivated by fear of punishment or disappointment of parents, and this is what makes them study hard.
An adult person has to self-praise, encourage and force. Those who, in their childhood, were not accustomed to doing anything without external pressure, there is a risk to quickly turn from an excellent student into a loser.
- Will not develop social skills
In teenage films, excellent students are avoided and teased, and they can not stand up for themselves. And this stereotype, unfortunately, is not always far from the truth. Knowledge will not replace communication. You can tell yourself as much as you want that your child is special and not equal to ill-bred classmates. Or think that he will go to college - and everything will change. But social skills do not appear out of nowhere. They, like others, need to be developed. Otherwise, in the end, a clever child will envy a charming classmate, a student who easily communicates with girls and likes teachers so that they overestimate his grades.
By adulthood, it is important for a person to learn how to make connections and easily communicate with others. It is not necessary to isolate the child from peers for the sake of good grades.
- Will get used to assess yourself and others on external achievements
Children do not like excellent students because they consider themselves better than others. But it is difficult to blame the child for this: from an early age, he gets used to thinking that good grades make good him, and bad ones - on the contrary.
This logic not only prevents you from making friends, but can also spoil your adult life. After all, if you evaluate yourself only on achievements, any failure will turn from a winner into a loser. It is important to raise in the child the unconditional value of oneself and others, so that he understands that assessments, and other external achievements, too, do not determine either his personality or the identity of those around him.
- Will avoid failure
Everyone sooner or later have to face failure. And it's better if it happens early. Then the child will learn to cope with unpleasant emotions and move on. If he gets used to the idea that everything should be given easily, in adult life, most likely, he will avoid and be afraid of failures.
For people who are used to assess their abilities as innate, failure is a signal that they are not so smart and talented. Those who understand that abilities develop, relate to failure as a lesson and inevitable mistakes on the road to improvement. Simply put, it is more useful for a child to get a triplet, fix it and take out a lesson from it than to desperately cram and shake with horror,that he would get it.
- Will not learn to think creatively
High marks are largely the result of good memory and perseverance. But the adult life does not give ready decisions and does not put points for the test results. The child will have to face complex ethical issues, regularly make choices in situations where there is no uniquely correct decision, independently analyze the data and draw conclusions based on them.
Fantasy, thinking and logic are much more useful in life than the ability to memorize two paragraphs in the evening. It is worth focusing on the development of the child's skills, and not on obtaining ideal estimates.
- Will not learn to defend his point of view
If the son or daughter is assiduously crammed, responsibly fulfills tasks and obediently follows all your instructions, do not rejoice in complaisance and obedience.
Children are ready to play football for days, get drunk to read books on history or fantasy. And it's normal - to defend your interests and try to avoid what you do not want to do. If the child is not interested in anything but good grades, he tries to fulfill all the requirements of adults and is afraid to object - it's bad. Submission and weak character are not the best traits for adulthood. It is better to give the child at least a minimum freedom and responsibility in making decisions, including in school. It will develop independence and facilitate further life.
To study perfectly, of course, not bad. But there is nothing terrible in having average scores. In the end, success in life is determined not by a school certificate.
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