We forsook the Santa story when our sons were still pretty young. For us, it was lying. So we told them the truth and apologized.
Our older son is the more stoic one anyway, and seemed to handle it just fine. He was very matter of fact about it. I think he suspected.
Our younger son was another story. He's the social one with his emotions on his sleeve. As soon as we told him, he started crying. We apologized and tried to comfort him. After a while he told us that he wasn't crying because there wasn't a real Santa. He was crying because we had lied to him.
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I respect this. I think I was just trying to find that sweet spot between childhood and adolescence. My kid just happened to make it long enough to fully accept that it is all "pretend" (this was merely sheer luck). He was able to process it as not simply a lie. Each family is unique. I respect how every family handles the situation. This worked for me. I know it will not work for all.
It's all good. I wouldn't have said anything if you hadn't asked. :)
We all do what we think is right and best in raising our kids. We all screw something up. And a lot of what we do isn't right or wrong, it just IS - and it's good because it IS with our kids.
This is one of the most reasonable things I have ever read on the subject of parenting. Something tells me you will take that as the compliment it is intended to be. Exactly! We all should do what IS right with our kids. There is no way to know what it IS until the situation presents itself. Cheers!!!!