Dunno Shayne, you tell me :D
Agreed that 'tolerance' can be seen as having to force yourself to 'like' something that you don't. I do think that 'tolerance' has within the concept a forcible acceptance, or endurance of something. It seems a bit like a suppression of 'being offended', not speaking out or saying that one 'doesn't like'. Tolerance just puts up.
I (too?) think the issue is upside down.
If I am tolerant of, say, homosexuality, then I do not 'accept' it, for I am fighting the very notion/concept (or perhaps the tendency within myself). If I am offended by the very presence of someone who expresses 'gayness', then this says a lot more about my prejudices/issues than anything about the person. This is what I was trying to express in my comment. If I judge (and being offended or 'tolerant' or 'intolerant' is to pass judgement, rather than to just accept), then my judgement says everything about me, and my psychological position, and nothing about the person I am judging. Although the words can look as if I may be saying something about them, the real between-the-lines stuff is all about me and how I view the world, how I project my unprocessed pain and trauma onto the world and onto others.