Is being as happy as a badger's chuff the same as being as happy as a pig in poo? lol
Having an old crone spit on your shoes is most distasteful! I'd have to and get some bleach. Yuk!
For the cubicle incident, perhaps your company should invest in sound proofing?
It is exactly like that!
She just missed my shoes, if she had got my shoes I might have reacted a bit more hehe..
They would have to invest in lead shielding given the sounds of it :O)