Besides my Introduction post, which was very nerve wracking by the way, I guess writing my next article should eventually come to light despite my constant insecurity of being "here".
What I have realised is that NONE of our stories are all the same and yet there are so many similarities in so many ways....Some are going through what you have already been through or still might go through, depending on your age or just where you are in your life emotionally..........That is why friendship or just simply a listening ear is so vital so the majority of us (despite the fact that we often want "the world" to think we have it all under control) however love for self is most probable undeniable the most vital characteristic we should strive for.
Like the song "The Story" goes :
All of these lines across my face, tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been, and how I got to where I am
But these stories don't mean anything, when you've got no one to tell them to
It's true, I was made for you
At some point in our lives we all think that we have it all, right? A girl/boy looking great on paper....Great job, married to your dream partner, have incredible friends and by most people's standards we would just be seen as generally having a good life right??!!
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, there is a lot of over analysing every conversation or situation and all you could worry about was or is what people might think of you. Often those insecurities turn into depression and that depression has the potential to escalate into absolute chaos in our lives.
Going through the motions every day, checking off the 'boxes' and thinking "Gosh I should be happy right" but yet here you are feeling completely overwhelmed and trapped in a life, a body or a situation where you start hating yourself to a very unhealthy degree............ I have at times felt like a fraud because WHO and WHAT people saw, was actually not what was causing whirlwinds in my stomach. I have at times been so exhausted from putting on a show to make life seem like it is great when in actual fact I used to look for my validation in just simply existing from others!
Eventually you are forced to do introspection and realise that in actual fact, you are able to be in charge of your own life and your own happiness.......... Getting to this point is never complete in my life BUT I can say that I am a constant work in progress .......... and right now I am ok with that!
I keep reminding myself and others not to judge MY story by the chapters that others have walked in their lives because their book was never written for me. It is undoubtedly possible to climb out of this pit of darkness.....And if you end up climbing out of the same pit more than once.....GREAT.....Because essentially that just means that you are working on yourself and you care about yourself .......... You might take 2 steps forward and 3 steps back ......BUT that is also ok! Part of my motto/mantra (and yes there are a few) is to keep on keeping on.....No matter where you are right now at this very moment in your life....... Start NOW :-)
That voice in YOUR head telling you that you are not good enough, or pretty enough, or thin enough, or whatever! Tell it straight that it is a blarry liar! We are all destined for great things and we really need to believe that with all our heart for ourselves and for others.
Encourage yourself to always TRY and be the light, in your own life and the lives of others.....The mountains we all carry around was meant for us to climb ...............
If we never walk in the rain, we would never really know how good it truly feels to walk in the sun - even on the darkest days - always look for the sunshine - be the sunshine. One foot in front of the other........And the will to want to try at least!
May we all start believing in ourselves more and in our abilities so that we can be a rainbow to ourselves and so many others..... At the end of the day it is essentially about how you make others feel when you leave them, that includes yourself. Be kind to yourself and the rest will fall into place.
Your story is special and so worth it!
Loving and honest thoughts...thank you...
A few notes I made while reading your story....we all want to be "validated"...humans spend many if not all of our years looking for validation for the wrong things...those of us who find some "awakening"...come to realize we need to first get comfortable with who we truly are and then attract the right type of people based on that...it is very freeing and scary...it goes against the way life looks...
Secondly...many of us carry the trauma's of our past into our adulthood...we can set our lives up to look like we are "normal" functioning all american families...and this day in age its easy to have too much to do allowing us to get easily distracted....but...when the moment come when the music stops and we are forced to live with ourselves and our reality...yikes....
Face it...I will never feel "good enough"...I will always regret certain choices or non choices over my decades on the earth...however...I've become much more forgiving of myself and spend a lot of quality time with people I love...who are able to accept my love...as me and as them...and as you suggested...its "progress not perfection"....
May your journey find you many comfortable paths...
I can completely identify with what you said.... Hence the fact that I have been so brutally honest that I myself am probably the biggest work in progress.... I truly hope that you can see how much better you become every day xxx. I really appreciate your feedback :)
No need to be fearful of being yourself....its a good thing, especially if you're not an ass :).
Almost everyone feels less than, and if you allow this to rather motivate you to do better (as you mentioned you feel) then it is doing its job. As long as it doesn't break you down and get you hating life or yourself.
It's about the direction your facing and not how far you are on the road.
Sterkte :)
Exactly.... Though easier said than done I still keep trying every day..... Some days I win and jump a hurdle and other days I trip over those hurdles but what's important is getting up and dusting your knees to carry on!
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