Long term sustainable relationships have a foundation based on love, honesty, and trust. Although honesty is important in any relationship, it can also be painful if it's too blunt. There are some things that just can’t be said, because of the damage it may potentially cause, forcing your partner to change their opinion of you.
Especially if there’s love, then there are certain truths that are revealed, that can directly alter the relationship, so they should be kept in silence. Most often, you can display your love by just keeping your mouth shut, to avoid the damage or an argument.
What is perhaps foremost, is that you never criticize your partner when they’re trying their best to do something, as that’s one of the worst things that you can do. If it appears that they’re putting in the genuine effort, commend them on their effort and never criticize.
Otherwise, they would feel extremely disappointed, that you don’t recognize or appreciate them when they want to accomplish something, this by doing their best. Support them instead, and hope they might succeed.
1. Never Tell Them What Your Mom Or Dad Would Of Done
Moms and dads to anyone, are major role models, as parents remain their "rock" for life. Although all family dynamics and relationships are different, at times dysfunctional, home is always home.
Everyone is brought up to do certain things in a certain way, so never tell your new relationship to do things how your mom or dad would of done it. What they have, is their own views and opinions.
All you need to tell them are the stories about how you grew up, and how things were done in your family, just as a suggestion. You should adapt without comparing everything that your partner does, to what your parents did.
2. If Your Family Doesn’t Like Them
You sense your family doesn’t like him or her that much. So it’s better to not tell them, since they’ll just get upset or feel insecure. Doing so, is guaranteed to create problems in the future, and there will be tension between you, them, and your family.
All that you can do, is just tell your family that "this person," might potentially be the one, and that you want them to respect your decision. Ask them to reconsider how they feel.
3. Do These Pants Make My Butt Look Fat
If they ever ask this, well duh, never say yes, even if it’s true. Never say “Honey, your butt makes your butt look fat.” She’s confiding in you, and you’ll just make her feel worse, and that you don’t like her as much anymore.
How would she feel if you said to her, “You could stand to lose a bit of weight.” Let her decide on her own, if she needs to lose weight, this since it’s her decision without you hurting her. A guy tells his date that she’s gotten fat, that’s a guaranteed slap on the face.
4. Never Compare Them To Your Ex
Never ever “compare” or discuss when you're dating someone new, the things that you’ve previously done with your ex. It might happen once you go to the same restaurant or event, but never bring it up.
It’s an extremely hurtful thing, since you're proving that you’re still thinking of your ex, and that person you're dating, isn't living up to it.
The worse is comparing them to your ex in bed. They’ll be devastated that the other was better. No one likes to be compared in any way to someone else, this in any regard.
5. Honey, I’d Rather Watch The Football Game
Even if it’s the championships, and you know she hates the game. Never tell her to leave you alone, because you’re busy, that you don’t have the time for her, as you and your friends are getting together to watch the big game.
Doing so randomly is fine, but never make it a habit every Sunday. It’s better to acknowledge, smile, and then just listen to what she wants to do, or if it's her idea that you do so.
6. Never Tell Them To Relax When They’re Upset
When she’s upset or scared, the worst thing you can do is to tell her to relax. This is proven to just make her more upset, angrier. The reason being, that they think you’re not taking them seriously enough.
If you happen to upset them by you making a mistake or being insensitive, and if you tell them to "relax," that they’re overreacting, what they’ll realize is that you’re just denying there’s a reason, for them to get upset.
7. Never Show Your Insecurities
What women are usually looking for in a relationship, is their knight in shining armor. They want to date someone who’s strong and confident, a good role model, a strong secure shoulder that they can rest their head on.
So if you’re insecure, the jealous type because she makes more money than you, for instance, then keep all this to yourself. Just support and compliment her. She doesn’t need to know, and she doesn’t also want a sponge either.
8. Never Declare Your "Love" During A Fight
The words “I Love You” are iconic in any relationship, almost sacred. So it should be used at only the most appropriate times. What most will do however, is say these words as part of their arsenal during an argument, which is the worst moment.
When you’ve made a mistake, feel guilty, you want their forgiveness, never use the but “I Love You” solution. They won’t believe it since if you really loved them, then you wouldn’t upset them in the first place, the way that you did.
9. Never Tell Him/Her You Like Their Friend
Maybe their friend is smoking hot, attractive and smart, and you just hoped that you met them first. But never let your current partner know or ever find out. If you say that her friends "pretty," she may get jealous or upset, and may not trust you around her other friends.
So keep it a secret, and make sure not to be obvious, and let it run its course.. If you’re wanting that long term relationship with that original person, watch what you say and do. Never be too honest, about the things that should never be said.