- Girls only liking you as a friend is not because of your body. You can have the godly body and face of Adonis, but if you act unsure of yourself and meek (the way you act and write now), they will only want you as a friend. Sowwie Adonis, it's like, I don't see you that way... you're like a brother to me, but let's be best friends!! The big takeaway, man: this problem is about how you think and act, not how you look. It's a very deep problem, related to your not having a proper father growing up.
- Most women really couldn't care less what you look like. She'll be the pretty one, she's got that handled. Not your job to be pretty. Your job is to be a man. You can have horrible battle scars, failed saggy tattoos, and a face like a pitbull. They don't care. As long as you project masculinity into the world, unapologetic and strong - women will be very into you.
- You can't "just be yourself" and hope things work out. You're fundamentally mentally deficient due to a deficient fatherless upbringing. Luckily now you're an adult and you can now "bring yourself up" however you decide to, to correct any noted deficiency. You must take serious action to change yourself and your mental ways.
- The fact that you're deeply insecure about how you look will always mess things up for you with girls, even if you get a series of superb surgeries and fix everything you think you need to fix. Meanwhile, down at the pub, the one-eyed peg legged naughty rowdy cursing sailor is getting laid again by a lusty wench who would make you jealous. He is also twice your age and half as intelligent (if that). WTF! What's the difference? He is not insecure about the peg leg, or anything else in his life, in fact the opposite. He frames it like peg legs are the sexiest thing since Lucifer the lord of Darkness. Pick any area of life and he is the king of it. Dropped out of highschool - education is for idiots trying to avoid good, hard manly work. Left eye blind and lazy? It's unique and makes his face look visually arresting. Always drunk, never has any money to his name - so what, his life is a neverending adventure. You see what I mean? You cannot pin that type of guy down to anything, you cannot make him be insecure with your own vastly superior status, even if he really should be ashamed of himself. He just can't be shamed, is unsinkable, smirks at anything and always has a comeback. This attitude comes from working in groups of men who naturally give each other little challenges all the time, they haze each other on purpose to become mentally stronger as a group. It works. Women are extremely attracted by this quality.
- You can think of it this way: women are hardwired by millions of years of evolution to mate with successful men. Women are sex objects, men are success objects. Success comes with its own little cues that women innately understand and are excited by. The absence of any insecurity and a "zero fucks given" manly attitude is always one of them. Girls always dig and test you to see if you're like that or if you're a pussy like most boring guys. Even if they don't realize what they're doing consciously they are looking very hard for any kind of insecurity. Some women will even deliberately provoke you to see what you do, how you react to being put on the spot. If any insecurities or weak behavior is found, you're insta-demoted to "let's just be friends". This is natural, she wouldn't want to believe in and mate with a male who is so weak and adrift that he doesn't even believe in himself.
One of the best things you can do for yourself in your situation is to think what i just said over deeply. Give yourself 24h, whatever you need. And then get mad, resolve to fight back. When you feel you're mad enough at yourself, you go find yourself the filthiest, smelliest, nastiest boxing gym you have in your area, that is full of oldschool sweaty men with busted taped noses, who all scare you. No fucking krav magas or super ballerina kickboxing! Join an earthy, simple boxing gym, you will learn how to knock a guy out with one punch in 2 months. But that isn't even the point. You're not going to be the champion, and you don't even have to like boxing. You're there to soak up the fumes of masculinity that are so badly missing in your life. Attend religiously. Tell yourself you'd rather die than miss a class; after all, this is your golden ticket out of your lifelong funk. It's as real as it gets. Your stunted spirit will blossom out in that environment, now given the nourishment it so badly needed. It will then soar all by itself, and dazzle the girls around you, without you even having to do or say much of anything. "Your hair smells kinda nice" is perfectly fine.
Any questions, feel free to bring it up with me. I will answer anything you want in ridiculous mouthwatering detail, after you post your giddy report from the first day at olympic stinky-gym boxing.
At the end of the day, the only guy you're really here to compete against is yesterday's version of yourself.
Perhaps this young man also lacked a male mentor in his life to teach him that there really is a beautiful duality called masculine and feminine; lurking in our subconscious whether we pay it mind or not.
Just to state the obvious, men don't have to be completely masculine...and there are women attracted to men that project more of the feminine side, or a shy side. Sounds like he needs to decide if he wants to hunt in the land of abundance or strive for the exceptional. To do the former he will have to purge himself of that feminine quality which he got from his mother that causes him to worry so much of his appearance.
I notice a lot of young men these days, with a similar problem, tho they are trying to become hypermasculine and already looking for steroids and testosterone supplements in their 20s, when they are perfectly strong and masculine looking. No amount of validation from female attention will curb it. Just as harmful as anorexia but it can look "healthy" just because they are muscular.