It's not nice to see when bad situations turn a good man to a bad man.
This is a true story about a friend of mine. I tried to convince him to come to Steemit and share his story with the rest of us, but he is one of those... you know the people who ask you about Steemit, saying that they will create an account, but that will never happen... This story escalated few days ago and I asked him could I write something about it on Steemit. He told me to do what I want but this morning, things became even worse...
PRESENT
The life made him a control freak!
He is jealous on all around his wife, he calls her 10 times in a day when she is at her work, he must be boss in his family and each decision comes only from him. His wife called my wife few days ago and said that she will leave him. She doesn't know what to do with him, so she will probably take their kid and go to her mother's. She can't stand him anymore! They are 4 years in marriage, and that's only because she got pregnant. They knew each other only few months before she got pregnant. So she didn't know what waits for her in that relationship but love made them both blind.
He is my friend for a very long time, we were together in the same class in school.
So my judgement is not clear in this. Especially because I know how he became so jealous. But I don't think he's just jealous. I think that his whole brain is in mess.
PAST
It all started 7 years ago.
He wasn't jealous at all, he was completely relaxed guy and always ready for fun. He had a girlfriend and she was jealous! She was suffocating him in everything and constantly accusing him that he watches other women. I can confirm that her claims were false. She made a drama for Oscar when he graduated on university and went to celebrate with his colleagues. I was there and I know that he spent two hours on his phone with her while the rest of us were drinking. After that, he confessed to me. I told him that night that something smells bad in her behavior. Or maybe I should keep my mouth shut!
He became restless because of my words. I think that he wanted to punch me, but he was the one who asked me for an opinion.
When he came home, he decided to break in her Facebook and Gmail account.
He just answered the simple security question, got on her Gmail and reset Facebook password. Then he checked messages and this was shock for him! He found out that she was cheating him from the beginning of their relationship with some guy! Three years! And he found everything about that affair in those messages. All about that dirty sexual relationship and he even found that they talk about him! His own girlfriend called him stupid idiot in front of her lover.
My friend's world crushed down.
All her jealousy was just her defense system. He asked me to come and I found him vomiting. I noticed that he printed all those messages and even put it in a decorated envelope! He made many copies, intending to "spread the world" about the girl he was in love with.
She didn't know anything about it. He just delivered one of those envelopes to her! And told everybody what was going on!
So he was telling: "My girlfriend was cheating me for three years" and she was telling: "My boyfriend was reading my Facebook messages.". How could anyone compare that?
However, this changed my friend a lot! He started to sleep with any girl he saw. Before this, he was a sportsman and an athlete, after this he has grown fat! He didn't believe to any women, he wasn't picky neither. He even was in sexual relationship with his mom's friend.
I wasn't sure that his heart was broken, I claimed that his ego was hurt.
BACK TO PRESENT
So he found a new girl but this one was 10 years younger than him.
She conceived just few months after they met. She had 19 at the time! So they got married. My friends fatness makes him to be lazy at home as much as he can. But the youth of his wife wants to go everywhere! She still haven't seen or passed some things in her life. And that made him to control each of her steps. They are arguing all the time, so that made their daughter the noisiest and the rudest kid I've ever seen. But he loves her and he will lose her! Because I know something that he doesn't! I saw his wife this morning in the city and she showed me divorce papers... She will confront with him this afternoon! I would really like to help my friend but I don't know how! It is his fault, you can't blame your relationships from long ago for your actions today... I guess that his girl from the past is to blame for all! She started this chain reaction of jealousy and it seems that it won't stop.
When I came home today, I kissed my wife and daughter and I realized:
There must be something good that I've done in my life!
Remember to support @whysoserious account and GOLDEN JOKER game! :))))
Thank you!
You are good friend. I wish my friends think about me and trying to understand my head.
If you would like to help -just be honest with him and tell him everything you think- do not spare him:)
Of course! Thank you!
It's quite sad to read this story... I hope it didn't end this way... 😭😭😭
He sent me a message that he could use a friend this evening... then I will know more
I see... it's great that he's not taking everything by himself... it's better to have an outlet... You're a great friend, @dumar022... ^^
Interesting story. I don't know what you can do in this situation. If he doesn't wake quickly enough to save his family I'm afraid there's nothing you can do to help. He might understand and agree with what you're saying, but if it doesn't come from his heart, there's nothing you can do!
I don't know what to say to him, because he can't change in a second, it takes time. And his wife claims that she gave him enough time
In my experience, it's best to stay out of a relationship. I have been dragged into taking sides and I've regretted it every single time :(
Relationship is a part of life. Without relationship life can not be good. I think life is not stay without relation. So i think this is good post.
Thanks
You are welcome my friend, I have a new post, do not forget to visit, let me add the spirit in steemit.
Hi @dumar022, if your friend wants to save his marriage he should go to therapy with a psychologist. Jealousy is generally a reflection of insecurities and low self-esteem and he can overcome this situation with professional help
Marriage therapy? In Šibenik, Croatia? We only sew these in movies
What a pity :( Sometimes people need therapy with a professional to help them overcome certain situations and that seems to be the case of your friend, some years have passed and he alone has not been able to resolve his interior problem...
nice
A good friend is honest to a fault. I wouldn't want to hear anything but the truth. Good luck!
well, as you said bad situation really turn a good man into a bad man. I am hoping for the best for him, and that he will managed to save his marriage.