How life helped shape my reality — And lessons you can learn from it

It’s that time of the year again where every activity for the year comes to an end, when it’s time to look back and re-evaluate yourself. That’s usually what happens, come the end of a year, but that’s not what I will do here. I will tell you my story about the life I have lived, life lessons I have learned and how it has shaped my reality and taken me to where I am now.

Hopefully, my story will motivate someone to keep pushing for what they want. Especially when the going gets tough.

IT’S NEVER OVER UNTIL YOU GIVE UP ON YOURSELF

My 2017 was focused on me navigating my first real work experience, which was filled with lots of ups and downs.

I was a 24-year-old drop out, living with my parents and never worked a day in my life (I always had this vision of starting my own business and never working for anyone). Given that my family was in the middle class and we were living comfortably, I was comfortable but still hungry to build a business.

I WAS FILLED WITH BIG VISIONS ON BUILDING A BUSINESS BUT HAD NO CLEAR EXECUTION PLANS

When life decided to spice things up

Shortly after I dropped out of college, my dad lost his job. My mom wasn’t working initially and my other siblings were in college. Dad was the only source of income in the family, his job was a very lucrative one though and kept us all happy and comfortable, well, until life intervened.

It was hard for him to get another job, considering the industry he worked in was currently favoring younger employees. Meanwhile, Mom had begun trading and was supporting as much as she could, but the more we tried to get on our feet, the more it seemed like we were falling deeper. The Nigerian economy wasn’t helping too, most Nigerians called it “The Recession Period” and prices of goods had gone up a whole lot, which affected everything and everyone.

I hadn’t any previous work experience, and so it was really tough getting a job, coupled with the fact that the only certificate I possessed was an ‘O’ Level Certificate I acquired graduating high school.

In less than a year, we had moved from being a very comfortable middle class family, to a family that was struggling to survive. It was hard for me to take in but it was the reality we had found ourselves in, and I had to accept it.

A year later in 2016 we were still holding on and pushing forward, dad was still unemployed, mom was still trading to support the family. I was still filled with my big dreams of building a business, still driven with my passion to never stop learning and growing on that area, no matter how slow the progress. But the reality was my family’s fortune was one that needed a turnaround. We were sinking, and it was happening way too fast.

In Nigeria, there’s this notion around being a first son. Responsibilities of taking care of the family begins to gradually fall on you when you come of age.

As the first and only son of the family, and with this mindset, I felt the pressure was on me to lift my family out of the predicament we had found ourselves.

All the knowledge I possessed felt useless because I had no idea whatsoever how to monetize on it. I had no execution plan and was left looking for the answers in books. I soon learned books weren’t the answers to my problem. Some of the books I read where good books but they just weren’t helping me take action.

I lived everyday with a new realization of the reality I was in, but one thing I never lost was hope and my passion for building a business. Each time I felt lost and about to give up, what kept me going was the thought of how important this was, not just for me but for my family who meant everything to me. That realization kept me going even during the most difficult times.

My greatest drive!

Having dreams wasn’t just enough, I knew if I were to ever stand a chance of getting what I wanted, I had to find a way to come up with an action plan.

So I spent the whole of my 2016, making connections in the Nigerian startup sector. I attended every event I could find, connected with people on facebook, linkedin, twitter and other platforms. I was networking like crazy.

My problem still persisted and would at times come back to hit me in the face, but here I was attending events. For a while, it seemed like I wasn’t getting anywhere. I literally had no source of income, so most of the time when I had to go to events, my mom would pay my transportation fare just so I could attend. I remember how bad and embarrassed I would felt each time I thought about it. She was always there for me. Her love and sacrifice for me over the years were my strongest drive to keep going.

I LOVE YOU MOM! YOU ARE MY HERO! 😘

Meanwhile, it was beginning to seem like I was attending all these events and yet there was no fruit to show for it.

With all these happening around me, coupled with my experience which I mentioned in my previous post.

I DECIDED TO VENTURE INTO LEARNING TO CODE

MY JOURNEY IN 2017 SO FAR!

It was October 2016 and I was still struggling to assemble a team to build my next big idea of a startup. I had decided to learn Python because I felt I needed it to build my idea myself.

I found an institution (name withheld) who had an upcoming cohort for a developer bootcamp, and the learning curriculum was centered around Python. This organization was one I had followed and really wanted to join. So it felt like python was the perfect language to learn, needless to say that while I never took up programming professionally, I ended up liking it and now I write codes for the fun of it.

Back to basics

With all these in mind, I started learning python. Within 3 months I was consuming content, video tutorials, interactive courses, language docs and other materials I could find. I had learned the python syntax at scale and even moved on to web development with the flask framework, but I still felt like I wasn’t good enough (the Imposter Syndrome), so I sort to find an internship where I could practice and hone my python skill professionally.

Meanwhile, I had also applied to this upcoming developer bootcamp.

How it all began!

Come 2017, a connection on facebook whom I had made the year before, introduced me to one of his connections who was operating a technology hub in the city I lived in. I got an interview and my internship started. It was meant to be a 3 months internship on web development.

When I started, I was given a choice between working on front-end or back-end web development. I mean, I went there to hone my python back-end skills and so it was only logical I choose back-end, right? Wrong!

Surprisingly, I went with front-end. To this day I still don’t understand how and why I ended up choosing front-end. Well, that went very badly for me. My first task was migrating an existing website to a new and improved site using a template. Needless to say, I flopped woefully. I tried to do it but I was lost, I couldn’t.

“Is this not the same HTML and CSS you had learned previously, even before python?”

I asked myself

“How come you can’t even migrate a site using a template?”

I thought to myself

“Your first real task was a failure, surely your days are numbered here”

My boss was an understanding and patient man. After a chat with him, I was given a break to go and improve my skill.

I went back and attempted to improve my front-end skills but had become scared of any front-end coding task. To say that I had learned this stuff and my first real professional attempt at it had been a disaster. I knew the underlying concepts and how they worked but I was beginning to feel I couldn’t do front-end and had picked up the wrong technology stack to work with.

At the same time, my application to the bootcamp was ongoing and after taking several online tests and passed, I had been invited for a face-to-face to finalize my interview and qualify for a 2 weeks bootcamp that would decide if I would join the cohort or not.

I had mentioned this to my boss, who was aware of this and when it was time for my interview, he literally arranged for my trip to the interview which was to take place in another state.

The face-to-face interview took place, I did my best but as it would turn out, I didn’t get accepted to the bootcamp.

I was disappointed that I didn’t get in but it was a great experience for me regardless.

AFTER I RETURNED FROM MY TRIP AND GOT BACK TO WORK, I DECIDED TO FOCUS ON DOING MORE OF WHAT MATTERED TO ME

It turns out the rejection was the best thing to happen to me, it made it possible for me to refocus and rethink what I really wanted to do. Which made me realize I didn’t want to be programming full-time.

It opened my eyes to the fact that I had these previously acquired knowledge and skills which I was more passionate about. I needed to find a balance between them and put them to work rather than take up coding, which I realized I wouldn’t enjoy doing as a full-time job.

Meanwhile, I had started taking online UX design classes before I went on the trip and was loving it. I got the opportunity to do UX research for client and it was a great experience. Which I enjoyed doing, mostly because it utilized some of the business knowledge I had acquired previously and the new skills I learned from the online UX classes.

By this time, my boss and I had come to the conclusion that programming as a full-time career wasn’t for me. He just wasn’t sure were I could fit in yet.

The Realization

As a tech hub, our vision included helping startups grow, and to do this, we would invite founders to pitch their ideas/businesses and get help from our network. During one of these pitches, I happened to be present.

I REALIZED MY KNOWLEDGE OF TECHNOLOGY AND STARTUPS ACCUMULATED OVER THE YEARS WERE NO WASTE

I put it to good use during the pitch.

THAT WAS THE DEFINING MOMENT FOR ME, IT WAS THE START OF SOMETHING NEW

When I went for an internship, I had applied for a web development internship. Having completed 3 months of internship, I had achieved nothing as regarding web development.

As a result of the events that occurred during the pitch, my strengths had become clear. This led me to be moved into a role where I now oversee all startup related activities in the department.

It was the right fit for me, I had finally found a place I could thrive in

I AM PASSIONATE ABOUT BUILDING PRODUCTS AND STARTUPS AND TO BE DOING THAT ON A DAY-TO-DAY BASIS, I COULDN’T BE MORE HAPPIER.

It is worth noting that the terms for my internship was on an “earn as you build a project” basis. And since I didn’t complete any web development project during my internship, well, I earned zilch. Although, it would be crucial to mention that while I earned nothing, I was given an environment for which I could continue to learn and improve myself on whatever was a good fit for me.

THIS IN ITSELF WAS WORTH MORE THAN ANY SALARY I COULD HAVE EARNED.

From a 3 months internship, which had started early 2017, I stayed on till late 2017. While I earned no salary, I was motivated to continue on this journey by my passion for learning, self-improvement and the motivation to get my family out of the situation we were in.

FINAL THOUGHTS

My journey has been an interesting one so far and while it sounds all entertaining and inspiring. There are a few things I would like to point out to those people who need a morale booster:

1. IT’S OKAY TO HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU WANNA DO WITH YOUR LIFE WHEN YOU’RE YOUNG. SOME PEOPLE NEVER FIGURED IT OUT UNTIL THEY HAD EXPERIENCES THAT LED TO THAT REALIZATION… AND MOST PEOPLE STILL HAVEN’T.
2. LIFE IS A TEACHER, IT COMES WITH LESSONS. DON’T BE TOO STUBBORN TO PAY ATTENTION.
3. HAVE EXPERIENCES ABOVE ALL ELSE. GO OUT, EXPERIMENT, FAIL, RINSE… AND REPEAT!
4. THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS YOUR BELIEF IN YOURSELF. DON’T EVER LOSE THAT!
5. NEVER STOP LEARNING!
6. BE PATIENT!

Thank you for reading my story!

This post appeared first on my blog: EVNS