"Marriage"

[ezzy]

Hey fellas, ya feel me?

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I got a screaming, naggin’ wife,

Makes me wanna end my goddamn life,

Go head for the kitchen, grab a knife,

A quick end to all this suffering and strife.

Her grating voice chills me to the bone,

Why can’t I get some peace and quiet on my own?

It just don’t matter how much I bitch and I moan,

The only escape being perched on the porcelain throne.

Why she gotta criticise me all the damn time?*

Pick fights, throws fits, a constant hollering and whine,

I bust my ass trying to save every nickel and dime,

Nine to five, trying to stay alive. Is that my only crime?

I can’t do nothing right, feel as useful as a concrete parachute,

Anymore of that droning crap, I’mma give myself the boot,

Down the road to the nearest bar, hoping she don’t give pursuit,

God I pray they playing Russian Roulette tonight, just pull the trigger and shoot.

Her voice is shrill, piercing as hell, if only I could shut down my brain,

But life don’t give you no emergency cord, just keeps you enduring the pain,

I was free long ago, when my home was my keep and these lands were mine to reign,

But that one paper sign, on that small dotted line… Freedom just got flushed down the drain.

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Hope you enjoyed this post, please look out for more on the way... (author: @ezzy)

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Comments

[kingscrown]

yo @ezzy contact me

[stackin]

Marriage? What is that? 😂😂😂

Posted using Partiko iOS

[ezzy]

All of the above. :)

[partiko]

Thank you so much for participating in the Partiko Delegation Plan Round 1! We really appreciate your support! As part of the delegation benefits, we just gave you a 9.16% upvote! Together, let’s change the world!

[gikitiki]

I think the title should have been. “Divorce”

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Why do divorce lawyers cost so much?

‘cause they are worth it.

🤪

[ezzy]

Man, "divorce" is a word I look to avoid using, even in jest! :)

[gikitiki]

That is a very good sign. It means that you are happily married.

[haikubot]

That is a very
Good sign. It means that you are
Happily married.

                 ^{- gikitiki}

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^{I'm a bot. I detect haiku.}

[ezzy]

Well, 90% of the time... :)

[gikitiki]

If you believe in Pareto, anything better than 80% is awesome.

[queeirisa]

Great post

Posted using Partiko Android

[ezzy]

Only a bit of fun, lol. :)

[chekohler]

You can’t say marriage without “rage” now can you? Says enough

[ezzy]

Lol, never thought of it that way! :)

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[anneke]

Hahahaha - the Bible does say a nagging wife is like a dripping tap.....

[ezzy]

...Yep, it never shuts up. :)

[ace108]

Nagging is inevitable.

[ezzy]

Sadly, there is no other type. :)