In order to win the dispute, we must first determine what exactly we consider a victory. For most of us, winning is an opponent's loss. We want other people to tell us that we are right, but they are not.
But this approach does not bring satisfaction, neither to us, nor to our opponent, therefore a victory in a dispute will not bring joy and benefit. It is not necessary for a person to point out his shortcomings and mistakes.
It is better to go straight to the heart of the matter, explaining what a solution will help the common cause. Therefore, concentrate on the desired end result.
If you understand what you need, then find out what your opponent wants. After all, people usually want to get something they do not usually argue about. Often a person agrees for a long time to argue about any stupidity just to have his opinion heard.
So show interest in the interlocutor, let him speak. And try to understand his true desires. This will help to quickly find a compromise.
Express empathy for the opponent. Explain that you understand a person and appreciate his thoughts. The interlocutor should see an interest in an early resolution of the conflict.
Understand the positive side of the opponent's opinion. Sometimes we focus so much on our own point of view that all other opinions seem catastrophic for us.
But other people also want to resolve the conflict in the best way. Probably, they see opportunities that we missed. Try to understand what are the positive sides of the opponent's opinion. This will allow you to look at the situation from a different angle.
Express your point of view or request clearly. If you have considered the previous points, then the opponent has already felt your openness and interest in someone else's opinion.
Therefore, your proposal, if, of course, it takes into account the interests of all the parties involved in the dispute, will be considered with a positive attitude. After all, you, therefore, do not impose your point of view, but simply provide the best solution to the conflict.
Good article!
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