WHO AM I?

in #life7 years ago (edited)

"Who are you?"

That's the very question that would come up to your mind when you see a stranger. How about if i tell you my full name, will you consider yourself that you finally got to know me even if you only know me by name? Or if i tell My birthday and go with you for lunch, will you consider yourself that you already know me?
That's what most people do. They think that they already knew someone by just knowing their name, They think they already knew people by just getting to know them in few days, eat with them in few days, and they can tell either that person is good or bad. or that person is happy or sad. that's why Sometimes people tend to trust easily, and judge easily with just a blink of their eye, Even if they never know the very definition of that person.

Now, let me tell more about myself.

My real name is Ghea D. Buenconsejo. I am a woman inside and out. I live in Cebu since birth. and i am beautiful with heart.
does that make any sense to you? haha what your perception towards me when i told you more about who i am?

Now, Let me dig more.

I came from a NOT SO BROKEN family.. Why did i call it like that? well, for the reason that my parents are always not in good terms but our family are still together in the same roof. I grew up with my mother and father who are fighting and i've witnessed plenty of quarrels between them yet they're still together. Growing up like this was never easy for me. Both of their are too busy with their own business. .
They're not like that when i was still a little kiddo, we are a happy family before. And i was the papa's girl back then.
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Our family crisis started when my father was engaged to different vices. He come home drunk, and he also wasted money in gambling. That's when they started fighting and shouting each other in front of us, their children. And being a child we don't understand it back then, all we do is cry and cry.
Years passed by and they're like that. And we slowly getting used to it.
No one can even attend on PTA meetings and recognition ceremonies at school on my behalf, even if i got high grades it won't move them to come and get my report card.. I even get jealous seeing my classmates together with their parents during activities at school, Their parents are always there to support them.. Me? I just enjoy watching them, wondering how it feels... Sometimes i just cry at night, i cry silently, so no one could hear, my pillows are my tear-keeper.. sometimes i asked "What have i done wrong?" " Why are these things happening to me?" "What's the Purpose of my existence?" "why me?" etc. . All these years, I am trying my best to understand my parents.. I just put into mind that everything they do is for my own sake.. and They are working hard to give me a better future.. But it gets me upset when i think about it, and the situation i have with my family. Even if we're living together, i can't feel the essence of having a family.
When i entered college, i don't have an exact path.. The course i chose is not really my choice, it my mother's.. Perhaps, i agreed on her decision, . Though i know it wasn't easy at all, but i want to prove to them that i can,.. There are so many times i wanted to give up, so many times i have gone through difficulties, many times i was discouraged, but i never showed it to them. i chose to keep it to myself. I'm someone who never shows my weakness to anyone. because i have learned so much from my past.
I've been through some relationships, it puts me to something where i find more comfort with other people. I set the as a family figure. I don't know but i always ended up broken.
I was broken and slowly putting the broken pieces back, but i know it will never come back to the way it was then. But i know i have grown strong...stronger to handle more pain.
The thing i don't like about myself is When i love, I love hard, I love deeply and genuinely, I always care too much to anyone close to my heart.Even when i know it what it takes. that's why some people say i easily get hurt because i cared too much.. But what can i do? Its me. It's just me. And I dont want to change it to become someone i'm not. When i am with my friends, I feel comfortable, I find another family outside home. They always see me smiling, like nothing goes wrong with my life, they see me as cheerful and lively person, but they don't know everything about me and what i've been through coz i don't show it to them. Im not the kind of person that shares my personal life and family matters with my friends, and i dont even want to share my personal problems, not because i dont want them to know, but because i just want to be happy. just being happy atleast before i go home. i dont want to bother thinking all of my problems everytime coz i might go crazy hahah. But seriously i dont want to think about it that much. I just make fun, my friends consider me as a joker in the group coz i make them laugh, they say i got the sense of humor. maybe i should agree with the saying "Sometimes, the funniest people are the loneliest"..

There are times when i feel pressured, because, i am the only one my parents depend on. I am the first graduate of the family. my sister didn't made it. When she was in college, she was like a rebel back then, because she was so affected with the situation of our parents always fighting. she has witnessed quarrels and seen our father gone through different vices. It has affected her so much that she left our home and go to her peers and she dropped her subjects without my mother's permission. that's why my mother cried hard and got very angry at my sister. she stopped supporting my sister and my sister decided to stop schooling, she work as a call center agent, and years later, she has her own family and give birth to her child LAst year.. that's when our family got back together. We are living in one house together with her family, but sometimes they still make quarrels regarding past issues etc., sometimes i can't concentrate in my studies when i am at home.

And that's my life before i found steemit.

Now let me ask you, After telling you all of these, does Your perception towards me when i told you my name is still the same when i told you my very definition? Well, i guess that made sense to you..

My life since i found steemit

When i joined this platform, I was like, "hey where should i start?" i dont even know how to introduce myself to people i don't even meet in person, or how to interact with them. I started reading some posts before i created my introductory post. My friend who introduced me on steemit said that "In steemit, you just have to be yourself". And so did i. But what i have shown, is myself that i usually have when i am with other people. Perhaps i failed to be just myself.
Because i introduce my identity, not my very definition. That's why people tend to see me as what i am posting, they don't see as what i am as a person. They only see me quarterly and not as a whole. And i made it to be like that.

The thing i write about the most on steemit is about motivation .. On my blog i shared my motivational perceptions, I want to motivate and inspire people who thinks they can't do anything better, I want to show them that everyday is a chance to make themselves better than yesterday, that no matter what it takes, no matter how hard the situation could be, They can do all things with faith and if they believe in themselves. I also share my personal experiences on steemit when i find it helpful to others, they might get valuable lesson through my experiences.. As for me, I usually learn so much from other people's experiences, I tend to reflect on their situations and try to look up on their perspectives and life decisions. I try to walk on their shoes. I don't merely look up on the results, I look up much to the process.. Not like other people who just see the final product and judge without knowing the process. Because i also experienced, being judged, many times, well, everyone else does, and i don't mind so much about what other people say. Also, I post more of my artworks, you know, art is just a hobby for me since then, and ever since i joined steemit, in there i find my passion for arts. There i spotted the difference between a hobby and a passion, Hobby is just like something you do regularly, While passion is something you cant resist to do, and no matter how you avoid doing it you still end up doing it.. hhahaha..

The first time i knew steemit is from my friend.. He introduced me on steemit. . At first i was intrigued when he starts talking about it, he always shares his experience.. SO i decided to join in the platform..
past-time? hmm.. for me its not a past-time, but its my part-time.. hahah. Seriously, i take time just to read different posts on steemit, when i got home from, before sgoing to sleep i drop by on steemit even without posting, because tiring school works i don't have energy to post something new, i just read some posts from steemians. How i wish i could be just a full time blogger, and can post regularly like other steemians do, but in my case, i can't, i have also different things to do, and must do, so i'm trying to balance my time management..

You see, I've been going through a lot. But i still have time to make things like this. I find steemit as a medium. A medium where i am able to connect with other people and help them out. This platform is made to make a Change.
Before i joined steemit i have spent much time on social medias, particularly on Facebook. And When i joined steemit, There i started realizing that Facebooks, intagrams, etc. are merely just a past-time, and i have wasted so much time scrolling on its news feeds. And i wish i have known steemit earlier. I'm like "Where have you been all my life?". Because, I can see steemit an Oppurtunity. Opportunity for ordinary people who have extraordinary dreams. A medium to connect and make a change. And i am very glad that this community is growing. And i am glad to become part of it.

A Legend on Steemit

Along with my steemit journey, i met a person who gives steemit more colors to me. When i begun in this platform, i always hear his name everywhere on the feed. It's like an echo through the walls. Many steemians keep mentioning him on their posts. And i was like "Who is he?", That's where i started following him in his blog. i read his recent posts and there i found out that he support minnows especially from philippines. And because of my curiousity, i even added him on Facebook. He is no other than, @surpassinggoogle..

Who is Surpassinggoogle?

When i first joined on steemit, i see him as an ordinary steemian who was keep mentioned by everyone, and everyone sees him as a whale.. and i didn't know that. Not until i have read some posts about him. I wanted to know more about him, so i sent a friend request to him on facebook. His name is *"Terry Ajayi", but his username was @surpassinggoogle. Hmm, i've come to think why did he come up with that username? Is he Surpassing the google? lol That's what i'm going to find out.
The time i sent him a request, i thought it would take longer time for him to accept it since he doesn't know me at all. But i was stunned when later that moment he accepted my request. so bring all the guts to messaged him.. hahaha. Call me desperate but i just really want to know him personally. So i sent him a message and attached a link of one of my post to catch his attention. Later on he replied, "Please see @steemsecrets on steemit, digest everything there, perhaps you will be there soon", And i was like "What? Me?" "what's that?" So i go and see @steemsecrets..

Revelation of @steemsecrets

What comes to your mind when you heard about "@steemsecrets"? You might think that its more about steemit and stuff which is relevant only on steemit matters. But i tell you, its not, its more to life than what you're thinking of.
According to Sir Terry, "the words on there are rare life knowledge, you wont find it in books, "no books" involved."
It composed of words from @surpassinggoogle which he made by himself, Words that tends to partake in the world-adjustment. It is made of wisdom and knowledge that could help and guide minnows not only on their steemit journey but in real life. It tackles the more underlying regarding life success as well as steemit succcess.
It is tied to teardrops, untalented, surpassinggoogle, steemgigs etc. In Steemsecrets, Sir Terry chose someone who will deliver his words in his behalf. I was blessed for he has chosen me as one of his speakers. Everyone on steemit is looking forward for the next @steemsecrets post. And i was waiting for my turn to speak his words.
He told me that he'll try his best to write a script for me even if the message is weak.
He said don't have enough energy to post these past few days, coz he's not doing fine. HE says he can't even eat, He's not able to post regularly, and he is strugglingto keep alive.
So i told him to make the script another time, and that he should at least eat something so that it will make him feel better. But he laughs instead, He said i am a funny woman.. haha i guess i am.. I just take his words literary, as he is pertaining to other things.. He says he post as an illiterate while the world celebrates the literate.
He has the rare knowledge that the world seeks. Everything he does has nothing to do with steemit, We are headed for world-adjustment. Lucky to those few who can see it though. And He believe that it is the purpose of his existence.
He practically lose his life to do this. Indeed, He's one of the strongest person i have known. He would even want to give skyscrapers. He doesn't want anyone to taste the suffering for he will do the suffering. thus, he doesn't have a life, he was created for it. He explains the underlying behind all his post.
Perhaps, i am still looking forward to meet him in person and have a conversation. I believe that the very knowledge he spills out is something that everyone needs and something that the world seeks. Something that could open the eyes of anyone before them. He carries the dreams of the nation. He's not a normal human. He is an Extraordinary Human. So my question regarding his username made sense to me right now. "@surpassinggoogle" HE is really surpassing the google.. haha
That what i am trying to figure out since then. He said that the Philippines isso blessed. And his major mission is in Philippines, because other nations can figure things out more easily. He says that "filipinos have everything it takes but they don't know this. Filipinos are blessed." Many people don't know what suffering is. Suffering is not that I can't eat, those are challenges, he said. So i have come to think of it more deeply. He was right. Most of the suffering here are solvable challenges..
This man made me understand the underlying of suffering. Its more that what i thought it should be. And that's why there is @steemsecrets etc. With steemsecrets, Every minnow is a whale inside..

The following are some of the revelations of fastest-rarest Steemit speed-up knowledge in the words of @steemsecrets

  1. Steem Secrets #1 (Delivered By @sunnylife): "You Are Whale To Me!"; This Is Where Your Steemit Journey Should Begin.

  2. Steem Secrets #2 (Delivered By @ankarlie): "You Own Steem". We Take Steem To The Moon.

  3. Steem Secrets #3 (Delivered By @enjieneer): "Rewards" On Steemit Involve Way Bigger Things Than "Money". Abeg, Shine Your Eyes!

  4. Steem Secrets #4 (Delivered By @gerel): Shake The Steem Blockchain With A Piece Of Awesome "YOU", For "There Was Life Before Steemit".

  5. Steem Secrets #5 (Delivered By @allerie00): Much Of The INTEL That You Will Need, To Attain "Steemit" Success, Lies In "History".

  6. Steem Secrets #6 (Delivered By @itsjessamae): The Rarest INTEL About Steem Wallets. For Success Even On Steemit, "Respect" Is Involved.

  7. Steem Secrets #7 (Delivered By @zoeroces): To Really Shine On Steemit, You Will Need To Be Slow About "Conclusions".

  8. Steem Secrets #8 (Delivered By @athenabree08): To Succeed On Steemit You Will Need A Lorry Load Of Foresight. See This Rare Intel!

  9. Steem Secrets #9 (Delivered By @theree2389): On Steemit, There Is "Opportunity"; "The Tip Of The Opportunity" & "Lost Opportunity". Which Will You Have?

  10. Steem Secrets #10 (Delivered By @thereikiforest): On Steemit, There Are Bigger Things Than "Quality Of Content". Digest This & Your Posts Will Start Trending!

  11. Steem Secrets #11 (Delivered By @sissyjill): On Steemit, To Attain "Greatness" And Draw People In Using Just Your Post, You Will Need To Work At Impressing Yourself First.

  12. Steem Secrets #12 (Delivered By @maylyn09): Is An Upvote All That Free? Alot Of Steemit Speed-up Lies In The Answer To This!!! (On Dlive)

Many steemians are looking forward to every post in steemsecrets. Above all, @surpassinggoogle has gone through many challenges lately, that it has drained his energy to write for a new post. He needs strength, and let us pray for it.
When we had our conversations he said that i am a funny sweetheart, and i should stay a sweetheart..
That's the kind of man he is. He is pure and gentle. He knows how to humble himself to everyone. I got to know him more when i read his post about "Dedicating My Entire Steem/Steemit Journey To My Mum As She Fights To Hold On To Life. Steemit/Steem: Don't Quit!; "The Cheating In Life Must Abate"..
And there i found the way to understand his advocacy and why he is struggling to survive, and his pure love.

Along with @teardrops, @untalented, and @steemgigs where everyone has something to offer, let us pray that teardrops token will come to live.

The thing i'll never forget when we once had a convo He said, "when i see you, i dont see what you see about you, i see you in your true colors. but you havent seen yourself in those colors yet, you are still in black and white but there is HD now." And so i asked out of nowhere, "What do you see in me sir?", HE replied "you can fly, you have wings
and even if you didnt, you can fly without wings. you are 6ft but you think you are 4ft11". And i was like, (wow, big words). I believe every word he says. It always got me speechless in the middle of conversations.

What am i trying to say here?

He is not just a mere whale. He can see something in us that we can't see in ourselves. And he'll tell things that doesn't have to do with steemit but in real life. He tells you to be a carabao but be real. and that's what i am trying to do now.
Just being myself is all that matters. That's why as long as this person (@surpassinggoogle) stays active on steemit, i have the very purpose to stay on steemit. He gives not only the knowledge but also the courage to steemians to pursue their journey in life and in steemit.

If i had just one shot

If i had just one shot at breakthrough, and it will be my very next post, I will write about something that could make sense to anyone in or outside steemit community.. I will write something about anything that matters, something i find that could change the World for the better.. something that could open everybody's eyes and understand the underlyings. Like what @surpassinggoogle does with his post, but i'll do it in my own way. I'll make something that is historical.
Something like i will make a time machine and go back to the past and change everything to prevent bad things from happening. but ofcourse i can't do that. What i am trying to say is that i want to make something simple, but has a huge impact. A good impact.
What do you think? If i make a time-machine and make a change in the past, can i assure that it has no worse impact at the present? do you think i can still be alive today, or you are still alive today when i make a change from the past? Well, we can't assure anything because only God knows what will happen tomorrow and to succeeding days. All the days passed can never be brought back and it will only remain at the past. Perhaps we know that we only live once, so we better make our life worth it and memorable. One should make something that will be engraved in the hearts of human and continue to be engraved in the hearts of the next generations. Like Dr. Jose Rizal, Through his writings He made a change in our nation and it was engraved in the hearts of all Filipinos up until this moment. Like all the disciples of Christ who live out their lives in spreading out the good news to different nations, and they are still engraved to the hearts of every people nowadays. The dreams of nations must come to live.
I always look up on writing that kind of post, and i will try to make a portrait about it. you'll see. i will make a portrait for my entry on @steemsummit, it is something that can relate of what i am talking about here. But i'm still working on it..



This post is related to @surpassinggoogle's "It Is Time For An Exciting Series, That Celebrates The Human Behind Each Steemian. post. And i am looking forward for his advise regarding this post. I followed a sequence of questions which i have answered vividly, and i write it in an "untalented-style".
@surpassinggoogle is doing his best and give more of his efforts to dig more. Let us give our utmost support for him to regain his energy. We are all looking up to him. Everything he does is not for himself but for all of his. And with my deepest gratitude, I Thank you @surpassinggoogle from the bottom of my hypothalamus.

"Nations are just locations! We are the World!"-@Surpassinggoogle

We connect and communicate, through steemit we'll build the world! :)

Yours truly,
@geeyang15
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Thanks everyone for dropping by! Together, We'll Make our dreams come true!

Sort:  
What can I say? Hmmm.. You're pretty strong to weather all the problems you had. Struggles are inevitable and we have to defy them in order to survive.
Thank you for sharing your life experiences and stay strong.

Thank you so much @snowhite.. :) indeed, struggles are always part of our lives. But God won't give us struggles that he knows we can't handle, so we always have to keep strong..

Thank you for sharing such powerful words. I'm so happy you found steemit. I found you because of @surpassinggoogle and I am so glad I did.

I did not know about @steemsecrets until reading your post. I will take a look at all of those posts and I'm sure it will help me do better here.

Many blessings to you :)

Hi @fitinfun, Thank you so much for reading my post. It's a pleasure to me.. And i am so much grateful that you found me, All Thanks to @surpassinggoogle, Our Terry boy, For giving me this kind of opportunity to lend my words to you..
It is a privilege to discover and know @steemsecrets, it has the rare knowledge that you can't find in any books. Perhaps you should see it and digest everything in it, it will help you a lot. Thank you.. :)

You're welcome - I'm so glad to connect with you, and now I have a lot of reading to do.

Great post! I'm looking forward for your blogs! 🌷

Thank you @clarkgalope! :)

That was quite long but I do finish reading it; however, I'll just get back to the mysterious story behind the pseudonym @surpassinggogle(it's late now and just like you I'm just on my regular activity of checking steemit after long and stressful day). I wonder what happen to your dad before he got engage with those activities?

Ghea, you are a great person. It was really nice to meet here on this post, hope you do great things that you are destined to.

Hi there @mydivathings.. Thank you for dropping by.. It a pleasure to meet you too.. We found each other here.. Everybody's great, as well as you do.. Stay awesome.. ;)

Ugggh!!!! You just made my tears fall. :'( I can't even find words to tell you but, all I will just say is, "You made me cry." Your words just went straight to my heart.

And because of you, I added him on facebook, too. HAHA :D :D I am just also very new here on Steemit and like you were before, I am so curious too. :D I am just 13 days here on Steemit. :D :D

Hi @creyestxsa94.. Thank you so much for your sympathy..I treausure it with all my heart.. Don't worry much coz your tears always have a value.. :) hope you enjoy your stay here.. :) stay awesome buddy.. ;)

Yup, I am definitely enjoying my stay here. And you guys made it more awesome :) Thank you :) Stay awesome as well :) :)

When I joined Steemit... I knew who are ordinary and not ordinary Steemians because it is my habit to check everyone's wallet 😂😂😂

hahaha.. maybe you can say what does your mind says when you see it, but you'll never know..

At least from wallet history I know they are not new to CryptoCurrency 😅

I think i must agree with that.. hehe :)

I mean was he like that or is that just a sudden change? Sorry to hear that tho. I am glad you found steemit, this is a great place where you can remove your mask and cure your smiling depression. Anyway, Keep rocking Kabayan I hope you do well not just here but also in real life. Just a piece of advice "Ang pagsubok pinag dadaanan lang yan upang tayo'y mahubog"

Hello @gavinci13, Thank you so much for taking your time to read my post, i know its quite long, but surely you won't missed off any substance you can take and draw it as elements on your own journey.
About my father, before he engaged with his vices, He has a stable jod here in cebu. He works in a well-known company and he provides for us. As for me, i can't say any bad things aside from his vices. He is a loving, caring, and thoughtful father since we were still kids. He doesn't even hit us, not even once. He loves us so much and i can feel everytime. But there come one day he lose his job, because of some problems he had with one of his workmates, i dont have to mention it exactly , but there was. So at that time he started to hang out with his peers, and come home so latte,. and then there it all starts..

Its nice meeting the real you :) Always being real is a satisfaction , hope you enjoy being here with us :) @geeyang15

I always enjoy being with you guys.. Thank you so much.. :) It's an honor to meet you.. :)

Congratulations @geeyang15!
Your post was mentioned in the Steemit Hit Parade for newcomers in the following category:

  • Upvotes - Ranked 3 with 333 upvotes

I also upvoted your post to increase its reward
If you like my work to promote newcomers and give them more visibility on Steemit, feel free to vote for my witness! You can do it here or use SteemConnect

Thank you so much for mentioning me on your post @arcange.. It was an honor.. :)

Thank you for sharing your story and your "not so perfect life"how brave you are sharing this with us. Therefore based on your writing I understand more about @steemit and a chance to know more about @surpassinggoigle.

I am glad that you understood more things about steemit through my post.. ;) And i tell you that it is great to get to know @surpassinggoogle not only through his posts but in person..

How I wish to see him up close and personal,Hoping by luck it will happen.

Gee how can you come with such that can make me cry? 😢
If you remove 2 paragraphs we share the same life unfortunately me I have never talked to the great @Surpassinggoogle. What made cry is not only your story and your innocence but also the way you express your feelings and optimism. @Surpassinggoogle I can't even believe is he a human or not. It's so sad 😔 how you said he is not well,Sir Terry Ajayi I pray you get well. I also wish I can talk to you but what is most important are your thoughts that am going to access on @steemsecrets.

Gee yang innocente girl 👧 you inspired me I have not get tired 😴 of reading your long post. You made me curious about Phillipine. I can't still imagine how have I found this diamond 🔹 (your post)

Thanks a lot @geeyang15 and your Hero, my extraordinary man @Surpassinggoogle

Hello @bmotives,. It's really not my intention to make anyone cry, but you did, and i am thankful for it. I'm glad how i has moved someone's emotion by reading my post. I am grateful, and knowing that we almost have the same story makes me feel sympathized. Don't worry coz your tears has always have value. That's also the reason why @teardrops meadia token must also come to live.. Dont worry, @surpassinggogle is one of the strongest person i've known, He always does whatever it takes.
I am glad that you have found me.. :) And i am ever more greatful to keep you inspired.. Thank you for taking the time to read my long post.. i guess its worthy after all.. Many blessings to you my dear friend.. Jehova is with you.. Stay awesome..

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