From a very young age, we are taught NOT to show our emotions. When a baby cries, then he/she is immediately soothed to stop crying. Toddlers fall and hurt themselves and are told to stop crying because it is part of growing up. When we are a bit older, it is a little bit easier to show our emotions, and we can show easily when we are angry or perhaps sad, but we are still so scared to be embarrassed in front of others that we hold back and withdraw into a dark place, instead of just lashing out.
In social situations, most people try and hide their feelings and emotions, because they don't want to look pathetic in front of others. We teach ourselves to handle our emotions in such a way that it doesn't affect our daily lives or God forbid our workplace.
I tend to do the same. I am a strong person, but I mostly keep my emotions to myself. The only emotion that I am good at sharing is when I am angry. Which I seem to be more than usual lately. I know that this is a bad characteristic, but if I am angry, people tend to leave me alone. Being angry has become somewhat of a defense mechanism.
I do not have many friends, but I am very committed to the ones I have and I will literally walk through fire for them, and I am sure that they would do the same for me, but I am extremely good at building emotional walls, and this has enabled me to live in my own little world where I feel safe. I am a very private person, and I usually keep things to myself because I do not want people to feel sorry for me. I have taught myself to be strong, but the bucket can often just take so much, before it overflows.
One good thing about getting older is that with age, comes wisdom, and often we get to a point where we just can't stand something anymore, and we have to get it out of our system. Then it is time to break down those emotional walls and to start getting rid of all the negative cropped up feelings inside.
Weird thing is that even if I am a broken person inside living in my own perfect world with my own little walls around me, people see me as a strong person and because I seem like a strong person, I often attract the wrong type of people to make friends with.
It is as if they find shelter in me because I am so open minded and can help them through their struggles. Isn't it weird that some of us can help others through their struggles, but we have difficulty working through our own issues.
Often we don't even realize that we are not looking after ourselves. We are so consumed with other people's problems, and our kids or families, that we forget to look after the person in the mirror. Today I have come to the shocking conclusion that I need to start taking care of myself. If I don't do something now, then time for me would be running out sooner than expected.
How can you look after yourself better?
1. Be kind to your body. Give it what it needs, and listen to your body when it tells you something is wrong.
2. Find yourself again. We have such busy lives that we tend to forget about ourselves. You matter!! (Even if you don't want to believe it.
3. Heal yourself mentally and your body will follow.
Today is the first day for me on this journey. Wish me luck!
Often times because of the pressures of this word a lot of people including tend to forget to cater for.the body
Sometimes we feel signs of tiredness and sickness but it is alwaya about the work
No matter how serious we humans want to.be it is very necessary to at all times pay attention to our body
If you car makes a noise ,you most probably wont travel with it until you have sorted ot out with the mechanic
Therefore it is necessary to take care of the body which you have used to make money to buy the car even more than the car.
Our lives are precious and very important and therefore it is necessary to keep it safe at all times
Go for regular check ups and do some exercises
Thanks for sharimg again @giantbear
I am a huge fan
Thank you for the wonderful comment.
Anytime Sir
Keep up the good work sir
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It is easier to see others trees when we are lost in our own forest.
Very nice, very strong and very true said there. Well written article. And nice suggestion to protect ourselves strong. Upvoted, resteemed. Hugs from Spain.
Nice quiet @giantbear. Wish you avery happy and bright future.
Yees. Definitely agree with you. We need to look after ourself. We need to heel our wounds rather then people around us. I didn't mean totally stop helping others just spend more time with ourself . Yesterday was my birthday. I was thinking the same thing all night long. I need to stop pretending being strong before to late. "Heel yourself mentally and your body will follow" Thanks for sharing, resteemed, upvoted by @motherearthist
I think being vulnerable in our culture is one of the most challenging things we can do. Generally we present some image to the world that doesn't represent our true selves- feeling, interests, etc.
Lately I've been trying to open up to people and life and let it in, let go of the fear that something bad might happen if I'm just myself. It's been really freeing, because I was one of those people who hid my emotions and feelings and opinions for most people.
It has been years since I have decided to break down those walls around me, and at the time I made that decision it was a mistake and I opened myself up to one of the most devastating emotional experiences out there. It lead me to a turning point, where I have committed to remaining an open and honest person.
Here on this side is a freedom that I see many other people struggle without, and the heart ache, the awkward conversations, the seeming flat spins, and all of the self doubt associated with it is all worth it, as a cost for my freedom.
What it has lead to, is that I am genuinely a beautiful person, because none of this is a facade. Even at my lowest, you can see that mischievous twinkle in my eye that says that I know something that you do not - I am not trying to blow my own horn here. I am actually trying to entice you to get over to this side.
There is nothing more fulfilling than to be congruent at every turn, and this is a part of what we are taught in the great schools. whether it be Christianity or Buddhism. More so with Buddha though.
peace
I bet Trump has been building walls all his life. Hes so easily offended.
Very good...
"but the bucket can often just take so much, before it overflows." so true.
"Isn't it weird that some of us can help others through their struggles, but we have difficulty working through our own issues." I suppose thats because with other peoples problems we can think objectively what that person should or needs to do, but when you are subjectively inside the eye of the hurricane and watching the world turn upside down around you and you're actually experiencing all those intense emotions it definitely screws up your objectivity big time. That's why when I have a problem I always ask a friend or even a stranger for their advice.
"Heal yourself mentally and your body will follow."
A small gem of advice there. As for using anger as a defense mechanism I agree it works, personally I like to channel my anger into positive actions, its a great motivating emotion for house cleaning or political activism but like fire it must be kept under control. And I wouldnt want to feel angry quite often, its not a pleasant vibe to feel, useful yes, but not pleasant...go ask the incredible Hulk if he likes feeling angry ALL the time..!!!
well good luck looking after yourself better. I think we should all be more mindful of that.
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A friend for your whole life is enough, two are many, three is impossible; in the sense of true friendship.
The really strong people do not need any kind of walls, they are not afraid to show their feelings as they know their value and so hardly influenced by the views of others.
In the dark you can see the light, follow it!! :)
Best of luck and willpower.