Hi @papa-pepper,
I just stumbled across your video and am not sure why you feel so sad. (That's how your voice sounds).
What is it in particular that you're struggling with? What I hear is that you're trying to make a decision who's time has not yet come.
It sounds like you are trying to decide between 2 things and that one of those choices (possible the one you feel you should take) is not where your heart is.
Forgive me if I am completely off base with this.
I haven't been following your posts so do not know your story, although I've heard of you (hard not to if you're active on Steemit 😁) and I know you have done a lot of good here.
As an "outsider" I can only respond from what I see in this video and, of course, it is only what I see. Not truth.
I just want to say to you that you don't have to decide anything right now. Take care of your heart. Let it unfold. All will be well. 💙 💙 💙
Whether you interpreted all my non-verbal language accurately or not, I appreciate you taking the time to share that. it means a lot to me!
You're welcome! 😍