I recently came across an article about Megan Markle’s “new found” British accent, and the uproar it’s caused, which inspired me to write about my own experience with losing my accent.
After 10 years of living abroad, there’s hardly a trace of an English accent left in the way I speak. So much so, that foreigners who meet me often compliment me on how good my English is, believing that I’m actually from somewhere in Eastern Europe!
And when I do correct them, I’m almost always met with utter shock, disbelief and demands to know what happened to my accent.
In the beginning, I thought it was amusing, nonchalantly shrugging the whole thing off with a quick “I guess I’ve just lost it,” before turning the conversation back onto them.
To me, it seemed completely normal, that anyone spending a significant amount of time outside of their home country would eventually develop a slight “twang” or dilution of their original accent.
In fact, it was only after visiting England for the first time in 3 years last winter, that I suddenly started feeling real shame and embarrassment due to my family’s comments. My brother in particular was extremely incredulous in response to my “fucking weird accent”; a factor that seemed to subconsciously affect the way he interacted with me.
Therefore, for the first couple of days that I was there, I became obsessed with my pronunciation, making huge amounts of effort to close my vowels and force my “t”s.
WaTer, not WaEr.
Of course, this only served to make me stand out more, receiving even more ridicule from my family for sounding like a pompous idiot.
“You know you’re not posh Vic… Right?”
Ugh.
My effort was so forced and unnatural, that honestly, it just made me feel like a fraud, leading to stronger feelings of isolation and rejection.
So, I gave up trying.
Interestingly enough, by the end of my trip, my accent had naturally become a strange blend of Foreign and Estuary English, which of course then totally disappeared as soon as I returned to Paris.
What causes a person’s accent to change?
This experience really got me thinking a lot about accents in general and why some people seemingly absorb so easily the accent of those around them yet others don’t. I also felt compelled by guilt to explain to my family what was going on with me. I mean, contrary to their belief, I most certainly didn’t change my accent on purpose, nor do I feel ashamed to be English!
In fact, I was convinced that there must be deeper, more subconscious elements at work and after some intense digging around on the internet, I managed to find some interesting information.
An impulse to adapt to your surroundings.
According to Dr. Damien Hall, a lot of the reasoning for accent change has to do with our natural human desire to mimic those around us. You may have noticed, to a small extent within your own social circles, that over time, you unwittingly adopt similar expressions and tones of voice as each other. I know I have, especially in romantic relationships - so much so, that my Mum has often joked about the fact I would become a mini version of any guy I dated!
Yet, interestingly, according to research, this has nothing to with feeling insecure or not being true to ourselves. Rather, there is a deep subconscious desire within all of us to adapt to our surroundings.
Indeed, during my time as an English Teacher in Portugal, I seemingly out of nowhere developed a slight American pronunciation to my words. If the research is to be believed, I could perhaps attribute this to the influence of my student’s (and my Portuguese friend’s) Americanised accents (which were the products of them having watched American TV shows all their lives) and my strong desire to be understood and fit-in.
When you think about it, that makes a lot of sense, given our in-built need for acceptance and drive to form close bonds with those around us.
However, it still doesn’t explain why not everyone loses their accent.
Social Class
With further research, I discovered that social class can also have a large influence on accent. Some studies have in fact shown that ever since the industrial revolution and subsequent increased social mobility, anyone considered Middle Class in England is more likely to experience accent change. This is because they typically move around a lot for work, travel and study, thereby interacting with and being influenced by a variety of different people.
This is in stark contrast to those considered Working Class who generally have the strongest and unchanging regional accents because they usually choose to stay and work in the areas they were born in. This means, that because they are constantly surrounded by people who sound like them, there is no outside impulse to change the way they speak.
And with regards to the Upper Class, their accent also typically remains unchanged because it is socially constructed rather than regional, leaving them unaffected wherever they choose to go.
The idea of social class and its influence on accent is indeed interesting, however I don’t think it has enough of an impact on its own, certainly in my case anyway.
Social Identity
Perhaps then, the most influential factor on accent change is that of social identity. Apparently, those who strongly identify with their nationality and cultural belief systems etc, are less likely to lose their accent.
In fact, a study was conducted in 2008 in Scotland that found that those who self-identified the strongest with Scotland and wanting to be independent from the UK were most likely to have a strong, unwavering Scottish accent. In comparison, those who didn’t really care had what is considered to be a more “neutral” accent.
For me personally, I believe this has been the biggest factor in my loss of accent. Sadly, I just don’t feel that strong of a connection to England. That’s not to say I don’t like my country, but I'm definitely not a mad patriot. In fact, I could care less about Royal Weddings or World Cup Football - a concept which to many of my foreign friends is utterly baffling!
I remember only last month, after the marriage of Prince Harry and Megan, that a non-English acquaintance of mine actually hugged and congratulated me! Now, perhaps that’s a cultural thing that is quite normal where she is from, but for someone as unpatriotic as me, I thought it was completely ridiculous, especially given the fact that it had literally nothing to do with me!
3rd Culture Kid
There’s probably a plethora of reasons why I’m not a strong patriot, however, I hazard a guess that it’s got a lot to do with being a "Third Culture Kid” (TCK). Indeed, research shows that children who grow up in a foreign country are less likely to form deep bonds with their native country.
Add into the mix exposure to a different accent over an extended period of time before puberty (as was the case with me), then you are even more likely to experience fluidity in your native accent, often resulting in what's known colloquially as an "international accent".
So what’s the conclusion?
Unfortunately, I don't think there's a simple and easy answer to why someone ends up losing their accent. It certainly seems, just from my basic research, that there are many contributing factors at play, and what may influence one person may not have the same effect on someone else.
Take my brother for example, who despite sharing the exact same upbringing as me is the most "English" man (and proud of it) you could ever meet!
Indeed, I could speculate all day, everyday and never come to a definitive conclusion.
My research has at least however, helped eased my soul in the fact that I'm not the only one (despite never actually meeting anyone in real life in the same situation) who's accent fluctuates like the wind.
Does the fact that I’ve lost my English accent somehow makes me less of an English person?
Having said that, the fact that I no longer sound "English" nor have a strong connection to England does at times still make me feel deeply sad, especially when I encounter people who reinforce that feeling. In fact, I'm pretty sure it's why I've recently experienced relapses in my levels of anxiety and depression.
Yet, in defence of others, at the end of the day, I believe we're all just trying to understand the world around us, and a part of that involves labelling the people we encounter, even within our own close knit social networks. We are, after all, biologically driven from a young age to seek "belonging", which in part is greatly influenced by our social or group identity.
And without a doubt, media plays a huge role in identity formation, especially in recent times with the furore surrounding cultural appropriation. Whether we realise it or not, we are lead to believe (and feel guilty) that identifying with a different culture, beliefs or nation other than our own is an abomination.
I mean, Megan Markle, an American celebrity, speaking with a posh British accent?! Who does she think she is??
Sigh.
My perspective now
My trip home really affected me on many levels, but most poignantly, for the first time in my life, I came away with the feeling that because of my accent, I was in some way less “English”.
Yet, whereas initially that left me feeling depressed, I’m now doing my best to think about from a more positive perspective.
I mean, if it weren’t for the influence of others, I doubt I’d even have cared that much about the way the words sound when they come out of my mouth! Nor would I feel guilty about not giving a damn whether England qualifies for the final of the World Cup.
If anything, it’s just serves as another reminder to myself to stop worrying so much about what people think of me. I have literally wasted so much of my life letting other’s opinions or definitions of me influence the way I think about myself and the way I act.
In fact, when left to my own devices, I actually think it’s kinda cool that my accent is so fluid and has, in a way, become an amalgamation of all the places, cultures and people I’ve spent extended periods with.
It’s like always having a little piece of them with me wherever I go.
It’s also put me in a unique position to be able to sound more native when I speak not only the language the country I’m living in but also the language of my foreign friends and fiancé.
At the end of the day, it’s not really that big of deal whether or not I ever regain my “English" accent.
In my opinion, an accent doesn’t define you.
Like I said before, it’s mainly others who have more of a problem with it and I just think there’s far more important things to worry about and focus on in life.
What’s your opinion on the matter? Have you lost your native accent, and if so, how do you feel about it?
If you liked this post, you might also be interested in my other articles:
Accepting Failure And Moving On
This Image Obsessed World Is Ridiculous
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What a great post! I tend to agree with the point if you associate with your country heavily than you’re more likely to retain your accent. I see this a lot as I work with quite a varied group of people and the ones that talk a lot about their home country have a heavy accent although they’ve been away for years. Fascinating thing to ponder and research, sad you were ridiculed for your evolving accent but happy it got you to write about it :)
Thank you so much for reading and commenting @stuffing!
I think I'm a bit of a geek in this regard, because I find languages/accents in general so fascinating! It is interesting however that your observation does confirm some of my research! :)
Extraordinary and original post thanks to @mirrors for showing me
Wow! Thank you so much for your kinds words! I'm glad you enjoyed my post :)
It was the true ;-)
:)
Firstly, glad to have you back!! :D
And yeah, I do think that our social identity or nationality has nothing to do with the way we want our accent to be. There's absolutely no need to follow a particular accent just because you belong from a certain somewhere.
The way I see it, accents are like cultural fashion. Even if you're Western, no one stops you from wearing an Indian saree. The same way, why should anyone stop us from speaking the way we like? After all, freedom of speech, right?
Thanks! It's good to be back! :)
I totally agree - we should be free to speak however we want! I mean, our accents don't define us!
I'm happy to see you posting again; especially with such an enjoyable piece.
You had me smiling quite a bit, because I am able to relate 'in part' to your experiences with regard to 'accents' Having had mine change from time to time.
These days, I am told that I sound like Sylvestor Stallon from 'Rocky'...Must be my baritone, 'bumped-in-the-head' too many times, N.Y.C. raised, half deaf enunciation...???
I love your writing style...calling @curie to find you here.... Yoo-hoo... @curie ...where are you???
Hey you!
Thank you for reading and leaving such a kind comment! You're too nice to me!! (PS - thank you for re-steeming my article too!!)
Sylvester Stallon? Now that's super cool! (I'm sure people are referring to the gravely tone to your voice, and nothing else about him!!) Especially mixed with an NYC accent! That's literally one of my favourite accents of all time (apart from Irish!).
Ya'r berry velcome...
:)
Hi @thekittygirl!
Thank you for stopping by and commenting! That's really interesting that you made a conscious decision to change your accent and then ended up moving to an area where people spoke like that!!
Can I ask why you didn't want to sound like where you were born and raised?
Oooh! You see, I find that kind of accent really cool, but then I guess we all prefer things that are different to what we know or have! :)
I totally get it! When we have foreign friends or family visiting I always mimic their accents unintentionally, don't know why, but I do!
Haha! It's funny isn't it!
Thank you for reading and commenting!
Living in Netherlands and working in a very mixed workplace with people from all over the world. I've noticed that others are "embarrassed" at their accents, when in fact all native English speakers (I'm from Australia) have accents anyway! So, I don't know why people try to hide it or are ashamed of their accents!
Also, I'm not sure if you've also found the same, but I've found I've picked up some idiomatic habits from different cultures. The most annoying one that I can't seem to shake is saying "no?" after a question...
Hi! That's a very interesting observation! From the little research I did, it does seem that the middle classes especially do get rather embarrassed about standing out because of their accent. You know, if you're upper class, you kind of "own" it and don't really care what people think of you. But when you're in the middle, you might feel a bit self-conscious of sounding "arrogant", "posh" or "too well spoken". I know I've definitely felt that way sometimes. For example, I'll "dumb" down my vocabulary when I'm with some friends of mine, so not to appear "big-headed" or "trying too hard". Do you know what I mean?
Either way, I do find this kind of thing fascinating. And isn't it strange how so many people seem to care so much about their accents and how they are defined because of it?
Ah yes, I've definitely picked up some idiomatic habits! For example, from France, I'll now say "quoi!" at the end of almost every sentence, even when speaking in English!! (Which literally makes no sense if translated, but serves as a sort of intensifier.)
But more than that, I've also absorbed the various inflections in the way certain people around me speak. For example, I'll put more emphasis on a particular syllable on a word in English that shouldn't even be there! It's actually really amusing!
Thanks so much for reading and sharing your experiences! Take care :)
haha beautiful write-up here! I did NOT know my Meghan has lost her accent, lol. I guess its inevitable, though.
Of course there's been backlash! That's the way the internet is! I also think having a fluid accent without affectation is perfect! Like you said, your accent doesn't define you!
Great write-up again,
Cheers xD.
Hi!
Thanks so much for reading :) I'm not sure if Megan has completely lost her accent, but in the press they were saying it sounds like it. According to linguistic experts, in a recent "meet and greet" with Royal fans, she was definitely pronouncing the majority of her words with a slight British accent. Either way, I agree, after so long in England and around the Royal family, she was bound to absorb a twang of some kind! I actually think it's kind of cute!
Take care!
This is a thought-provoking essay.
Thank you for stopping by and reading :)
I think accent is a product more of your surrounding.... you know, more of one of those traits that nurture rather than nature is reasonable. An African child born in Africa today whose parents transfer the following day to leave in the US, grows with an American accent, i would imagine.
You capture it all to well when you say
Honestly, this is one of the most captivating personal experiences i have read this week, besides the personal touch, i like how you relate the whole experience to others.
It is unfortunate this wonderful write has not been rewarded as, in my opinion it deserves, honestly. Otherwise it is one such post that meets all quality criteria of originality, relevance and depth in the extent to which it is written.
So I am going to feature this post on the next Xposed Curator's Rebound #24. You may find details about it Xposed Curator's Rebound
My hope is to bring your quality work here the exposure it deserves, and with it, hopefully the rewards.
Congratulations, and best wishes.
Hello! Thank you so much for deciding to feature me! That is so kind of you! I really appreciate it. And thanks for the work you are doing to help smaller creators - it's not easy to gain recognition here!
I'm glad you enjoyed my article and I agree with you about accents being more influenced by nurture rather than nature! Mine has more than certainly been nurtured into something rather unique!! :)
Thanks again @mirrors!
Take care!
Your are welcome, @gouldingv. Your write is very original. I wish i could do more!
At any rate, you hang on. And stick to such originality. Recognition, so difficult to get now will come, maybe not so fast, but it will.
Oh, you've already done so much just by featuring me!
Thank you for the support and encouragement! I'll keep plugging away! :)
You just hang in there. I am glad to make your acquaintance. And will now be a frequent visitor on your blog. Its worth it, going by this write.
Likewise!
Thanks so much :)
Such a balanced and thought provoking article. Quite insightful I must say. Personally I'm so taken with different accents all around me in Dubai and I wish I had some sort of an accent too haha Its nature vs nurture so yes its understandable that people absorb from their environment. I don't know why people would make such a big deal out of it. My niece is born in Pakistan but used to watch Youtube in her first thee years of life and when she started speaking she had a British accent! We all were so surprised since none of us have any accent whatsoever. She just picked it up from British cartoons on Youtube.
Hi! Thank you so much for reading and commenting. I'm also glad you enjoyed my article :)
That's very interesting about your niece! I think exposure to accents, especially when young and learning a language can really help you to sound more like a native speaker! :)
I changed my accent frequently, whenever I am with someone for more than I day, I automatically take like that person, I think it's called mirroring someone or some sort... puzzled me all the time.
Indeed! I think it happens quite regularly and personally, I don't mind it! :)
Yeah, sometimes it's just fun!
This was a great article! As South Africans we are used to people visiting or working abroad and coming back with an a different accent. I don't really mind it, I love all the different accents and even in different regions accents differ. It is so easy to pic up and so natural for us to do!
As a dutchie from the countryside with an accent in our own Dutch language I find this a very interesting post. And it makes me think about myself. I'm definitely a person indeed who has lost her own accent too.
In the Netherlands almost every village has its own dialect accent. And when I lived with my parents at home, I spoke in their dialect, when I got a relationship I took over the accent. The relationship passed and I took another dialect with me ... and now I live together for several years with a partner who I think speaks fairly dialectless ... and to my surprise I speak much more Dutch, instead of the dialects that I have spoken all my life.
Yet I am and remain the same person. I think that an accent / dialect may have something to do with the place or the person you want to feel most connected with.
Interesting article. Interesting read, good write up ... and definitely something to think about.