No. You're one of the best people whose ramblings I got to read and who took the time to read my ramblings. The battle isn't over until its over and nothing is lost yet. It can be turned around. Come on man, talk it out.
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What is there to say?
Whatever it takes. What's going on? (I know you don't use the chats but can talk in encrypted memos)
I've tried peakd chat.