that sounds so hard. especially interacting with other people and feeling this weight of expectation that you can't fulfill. what is it like not remembering your life? what exists there?
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that sounds so hard. especially interacting with other people and feeling this weight of expectation that you can't fulfill. what is it like not remembering your life? what exists there?
It was and still is hard even though it happened over 2 decades ago. I'm still trying to learn to both deal with and get past a lot of it. Honestly it's really strange waking up and not remember most of your life. I hear family members tell stories and they're usually pretty funny stuff about when we were kids. I laugh because it's funny but then I have to ask if I was there. They of course most of the time tell me I was then ask " don't you remember that". The truth is it scares me because they could totally lie to me about being there and I wouldn't know the difference. I still have a deep desire to hear about things from when I was younger because I feel like part of me is missing... not just my memories but that's a big part of it. Every thing you do in life and every memory you form affects you, you behavior, your well being, everything! It makes you who you are. I have no idea about half of my life. I do have a few memories but I could tell you about all of them in an hour probably. I'm not really sure what exists there... empty space mostly and I've been trying to live my life ... an reinvent myself. There's just some things there that are there and I don't know where they came from or why I act that way. It's unusual and it's confusing. It's a puzzle with half of the pieces missing I guess.
you should write a book about it. it could even be fiction. but in the nonfiction realm, just about the experience of this. I would read it! <3 much love to you. What is your life like now? You just live in the moment more than other people perhaps. That could be a really cool way to spin it to your unconscious that wanders into to much wondering about what you were like.
follow,upvote and comment @punitchoudharyand I'll do the same for you.
I would love to do that. That's been on my bucket list for years now lol I've sat down a few times and just typed and typed. I've lost those workings because of computers breaking and some other things. I've never really written anything and don't know where or how to start really. Thank you
My life now was living in the moment more than other people for years. Then the PTSD hit and it changed my world. I refer that as "the day everything stopped being possible" because it proved to me i was wrong.