Oh my God, I'm becoming addicted to your posts!
Also...maybe you should think about being a river guide? Every once in a while you get a banker in your boat. Sometimes cops. Judges. Lawyers...
Sometimes there are "accidents," and while no one gets hurt (hopefully), they have a scary experience. What I call a "Religious Experience." It's pretty satisfying!
Hahaha I can imagine that religious experience while on a river tour!