The biggest plot twist in my life happened when I was twelve.
It happened so long ago that I often forget about it but every so often, I think about how different my life could have been if this didn’t happen.
So in Ireland where I grew up, we have primary school where you go from five years old to twelve years old, & then you have secondary school. For most of primary school, I was a really shy kid. I mostly just kept to myself & would live in my own imagination.
But when I got to about eleven & twelve, I started to interact & come about of my shell a bit more. A new kid moved to the school around this time & we started to hang out. A group of us started hanging around with each other & we would cause some trouble. Super innocent stuff as we were just kids but the teachers & parents would make it out to be the biggest deal in the world as they were trying to set an example.
Anyway, I remember I was becoming more popular & the first half of my final year I got into a lot more trouble than usual. The teacher for the final year was also the principal of the school & had been there for decades. She had thought most of our parents & had a really old school & traditional way of teaching. So, in this final year, I had some fights & broke some strict rules which nearly led to suspension. There was some particular incidents which got particularly heated but I won’t go into details as this is not the point of the story.
When you finish primary school, you typically make a choice on which secondary school you want to go to. Parents have a big say but a lot of the times, the children will make the final choice. In the rural part of Ireland I am from, there was only a handful of secondary schools to choose from. There was one school which had a notorious reputation for drugs, fights, & bad grades. Let’s call this school BT. The main group of “friends” I was hanging out with were going to this school & of course I was wanting to join them. There was another group of about four kids in the primary school I was also friends with. They never caused trouble & always did well in sports & studies. They were going to a school which had a great reputation in both sports & academics. Let’s call this school GC.
So, in about the second half of my final year I quietened down. Partly due to causing so much trouble in the first half & partly due to a surprising compounding effect after I actually started listening to this teacher. I was turned off initially because before final year, you hear so much nightmare stories about how this teacher is so repetitive & old school. But when I started listening to her, I believe it was by a long shot the most rewarding educational experience I had from my whole primary school experience. The teacher was full of insights & little sayings that used to stick with me even after I got home. I remember on a number of occasions going back to my mother in the evening repeating the sayings. My mother used to have this little smirk on her face. She must have been thinking “what a little nerd”.
Anyway, coming close to the end of the year, this teacher asked me to stay while everyone was going out for lunch. I was probably thinking I was in some trouble again. She basically said to me that I should consider going to the GC school with the four other guys. I had already sat the entrance exam for the BT school so to a twelve year, I thought that was the equivalent of signing a done deal & there is no going back. The teacher told me she thought I was very intelligent & that she really thinks it’s a good idea if I change choice of school. She said it was no problem that it was late in the year & that she could personally reach out to the principal of GC. I was initially a bit resistant to the idea but I talked to the four guys about it & also talked to my mother about it. My mother was delighted & believed it was a great idea.
So you can put together the rest of the story. I eventually came around & decided to go to the school. As with any teenage boy, there was ups & downs. By the time I left the school, I was among the highest in terms of grade scores & was after taking up a lot more sport than I had started with. I went on to University & that’s a whole other life chapter. Many past friends & people I know went to the BT school. A lot of them do drugs regularly. Many don’t have jobs. A lot of them are still living at home with their parents. Not everyone but the general picture is not great. I don’t think of this story often but when I do I can’t help but be extremely grateful to the teacher who went out of her way to say this to me when it would have been just as easy to say nothing & also a bit frightened to what could have happened if I went to that school.
Thank you Mrs. French, I am eternally grateful.