Growing up as a kid. I used to hear one thing all the time and that was " you should be nice to others" and I did not understand why? But like most things in life my parents were right. There is a very high relation between how kind you are and how happy you feel.
So being kind makes you feel happier and happy people are more naturally inclined to be nice so its a win-win situation. Though i did not take advantage of it until i moved to another city for my bechlors. Being around thousands of people i was really lacking meaningful interactions ,those random smiles and gestures and as a consequence i started closing myself.
I started to research kindness in my spare time and to finding how to make people nicer to me.
I found out that when people are exposed to something nice on their routine , they tend to be more nice towards others. it doesn't need to be something big, just meaningful enough to trigger our brain in a positive way so i kept thinking that people are not waiting for others to be nice to them but to test it out i took small steps and did minor things and the result was surprising.
- The first thing i did was giving people free compliments. I know it sounds funny but those reactions and responses were amazing and ultimately made me feel happier and in the end i was the person who got most of the compliments. they were so happy to get compliments that they wanted to give it back.
The next thing i did was that i would make coffee for my roomates as they have classes very early and they had to go without breakfast so i wanted to make it easy for them and they were so happy and thankful about it.
The other small things that i did and some of them in my daily life:
.buying baloons for random kids who were needy
.Helping carry bags with older people and or anyone need help
.paid for a stranger's coffee
.compliment the watchmen for his job
.paid a friend's food charges in dorm
.left happynotes on people's cars
.left happynotes on benches
.cooked some food for my teacher
. gave a thank you note to my teacher
.spent time with old people who needed someone to listen to them
and much more.
And after sometime of this behaviour , sudennly i am feeling some so much happier and getting love from complete strangers. The same people who would avoid eye contact are now hugging me and saying all those sort of nice things.
It turned out that for me to change the world around me , all i needed to do was to change myself and be the person to take the first step and be kind no matter what.
I also learned that being kind was not such a thoughtless process as i once assumed and was perfectly doable after i came up with these 3 steps to help me get there.
1.#CHOSE TO BE KIND
One can argue that if you are not being mean and if you are polite it means you are nice but for me, i wanted to come from a deeper place of my heart. I wanted to go out of my comfort zone and do something meaningful for the sake of people.
2.#ACCEPT BEING VULNERABLE.
The second step was the hardest but most meaningful that i had to accept my own vulnerable . I learned that people are not desensitized to kindness.The moment they understand that your intentions are good then they relax and they let themselves in and thats how i was able to build connections. Thats how i became happier.
3.#JUST DO IT.
The 3rd and the easiest step was the implementation and finding those opportunities every now and then to bring the best of you like holding the elevator door for someone who you know is behind you or just asking a fellow how their day is going but really mean it.
Going through this process over and over really changed my life. It taught me how to take ownership of my own happiness. So now i am a deep believer that we can only improve the world through kindness. All we need is a bunch of people who take initiative and i hope many of you will after reading this post.
THANK YOU !