Ah, how to start. This is hard to write.
No more posts from me. Nada. Not a one.
I'm sorry. In more way than one. Obviously, I would love to carry on posting here on Steemit. I have become fond of so many people here and this site has become a big part of my life but sometimes. Well, sometimes things can get in the way.
And so, things have gotten in the way with me.
I will fess up. There is one big reason for stopping posting. One huge absolutely massive one which I can quite simply do nothing about.
My writing team have let me down.
And in letting me down, I feel that they have let you down too.
You see, long ago, when I realised that to get anywhere on this site I would have to write original quality posts, I knew I was in trouble. Why? Well, I can't write to fucking save myself.
So I thought, how can I get around this? How can I find a modicum of success on Steemit if I can't string two words together?
And not just the odd post here and there but every fucking day? I mean, how is it possible to write an original quality post every single fucking day?
I tell you. It's NOT possible.
Or so I thought, then I stumbled upon Fiverr.
Imagine! A whole site full of raggedy clothed beggars, willing to do anything for a few golden pennies flung their way. I was on to something.
So I started paying guys on Fiverr for stories. Make them up, I said, the ruder the better.
And they did.
It was all going quite well.
Until last week, when the writers found out about Steemit and started trying to blackmail me for more money.
I told them to fuck off.
They told me to write my own fucking stories.
Shit.
They got me there.
So sorry everyone. Until I sort out some replacement writers there won't be any posts from this old BoomDawg.
Anyone looking for work?
You might want to get in contact with that woman, what's her name? Theresa .. eehh ... something, I forgot her last name. Heard she's looking for a new dare.
Hahahaha, yeah, she needs something new to occupy her time!!
I am way too expensive for you. I am sure that other lady will give you a hand lol. What was that Doulla lady or something and I am sure she will think of some payment terms right up your alley.
I don't think I have the strength to pay those kind of fees!!! Hahahaha!!
I hear that you can hire some pretty cheap writers right here on Steem. Some of them are willing to post every day for less than $0.05 per post!
They shouldn’t be hard to find. Just check out the #steemissoawesomeandiloveitsomuchdearsir tag.
Hahahaha, I might be able to afford the cost before of those sorts but not the moral value!!
I'm not sure what that means... See, I can't write!!
Damn, bro. You need some writers stat!
I do!! I know. Maybe I can hire some of the rage-quitters. Give them a back door in? That was quality content that was missed... Right?...
Send them my way. I need them for curating, hehe.
Haha, now there is an idea!
Fiverr you say? Oh yes, that place you pay 5 bucks for a variety of things someone else will do. I looked into that once, didn't work out, all I managed to do was put my bank account into overdraft. I offered some of my own service on Fiverr, seems there isn't a big demand for basket weaving, though.
Well Boom, have a great day, it's nearing beer o'clock so I must be off!
Beer o'clock is the most important time of the day!!!
I must offer my services but wait, I don't have any skills!!!
I think it is really not enjoyable to buy stories just to post it in here. I rather tell my own stories no matter how distasteful my life is to others LOL @meesterboom
I can't help it, I'm a cheap dirty hoor of a steemian!!!
Always! And it isn't that difficult to come up with ideas... it;'s writing them down that's the trick! I hope this is an Aprils Fool joke!
Totally April fools! Although it would be nice to have a team of writers!
O please I think you will rather quit your job than stop writing.... the world will be a sadder place if that happens.
You are too nice! :O)
Be like the government, promise them everything, then on Thursday, introduce them to Uncle Boom, he has been quiet for him, for a while.
A quick sort out of those ungracious peons will have the survivors paying you to be able to write for you.
Promise them everything then boom... Sounds good to me !! :0)
In the mean time selfies might get you by. I mean, some people seem to post a selfie every f'ing day. Perhaps you could join the movement for more selfies. It's what the world needs..
Selfies!!! Aha, I do have a skill I can utilise!!! Hooray!! ;0)
I usually use deuce-and-a-halfrr....half price and ha...
I'm a bit fan of half price!!
ha!
What a great idea you have just given me :D
I need a site and a good paraphraser....
Hehe, I am full of em!! ;0)
Super, you can be my dirty ape then :D That didn't sound right, maybe I should not send this comment to chain. Too late!
Too late. Now we are doomed to have filthy ape sex on the blockchain forever more... Noooooooooooooó!!!
I've got an ape through a temp service doing most of my dirty work here.
A damn dirty ape!?!
Wish I had thought of that!
There’s a site called Tenerr that I’m on! Twice as good .
Posted using Partiko iOS
Haha! Tennerr! I likes it!
haha! you could charge top dollor on fiverr sir meesterboom, whatever they charge, you'd have more business than you'd know what to do with.
Now I just need to figure out something to sell!!
haha! oh my gosh sir meesterboom, any kind of creative writing. Well, I don't know about love stories but any kind of mystery, thriller, comedy, comedy, comedy. lol. beer commercials!
My mum told me that April fools' day only lasted until noon, is that true?
If so.. what you write is.. and we wont be getting any more Huel reviews... a sad day... , fiverr you say?
Haha, due to the daily grind I couldn't get it out any sooner, I thought I would aim for the American market. Ain't they them be just waking up!
Good old fiverr!
Hehe.. yes it counts there, I'm thinking on national basis.
Yeah, ends at midday. Then you were safe!
Boom has a large american audience :D
So much so that I have created an American alter ego to engage even better with them!
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Oh good, for a moment or three, my life was changing at an alarmingly alarming rate in a deep dive to the downward. Thanks be for that 32nd day of March. Losing the crafty BoomMeister on here would be like losing my cat. Now where DID she get off to now?
Bloody cats!! Bloody independent wee buggers!!
I'm fairly certain they will one day rule the world. Though they might do a fair dinkum better job than a few folks we have now...
How could they not worth their whiskered majesty!!
Pretty sure all of these around here have that majesterial thing down to a fine art.
upvoted and resteemed