Hey, chick? You have a moment?
I approached the Good Lady in the kitchen where I hung seductively like a sex python from the door frame.
She looked up at me from the table where she was working and frowned.
That doesn't sound good, what is it?
She sounded out of sorts. I wondered if her Minaj was bothering her, after all, she was in her forties now. It wouldn't be long before I was out in the pasture checking some other fillies hooves.
Well, you know I get a bonus each year...
I cocked my head to the side in a way I have seen cats do that people think looks cute.
Yes, aren't we spending that on decorating the lounge?
She momentarily stopped pecking away at her laptop keyboard and allowed a brief smile to play out on her face. In another life, I think she would have loved to have married a Joiner, Or a plumber, in fact, someone with leathery fingers that could do all that shit that I couldn't.
But I didn't mind that, I was an Imagineer and was damn proud of it.
That's the funny thing. When you say "decorating the lounge" I just wanted to check that that didn't mean me buying a new guitar amplifier?
I fluttered my eyelashes.
I don't want to brag but it was a known fact that I had the moves like Jagger.
Besides, what the fuck was this we decorating the lounge shite?
An amplifier. A guitar amplifier? What about the hundreds of guitar amplifiers you already own. Is there something wrong with them?
She had her lips set in a tiny thin line and bitter experience had taught me that that line was one which was very dangerous to cross.
But as Batman once said, sometimes you gotta cross that line. Or was it Taylor Swift, damn my memory?
Hmm, I do have a few amplifiers, it's true. But this one is different...
I sidled closer. I wondered if I should twerk her, that might swing it? Then again, I hadn't showered for two days.
What is so different about this amplifier then?
She growled low in her throat like a catamaran.
She didn't like it when I went rogue, wanting to spend my own money and crazy shit like that.
It's new?
I smiled winningly and gave her an affectionate nudge with my hip.
New. Oh wait, oh no, hang on... hang on. I get it. I totally get it!
She shoved her chair back and looked at me triumphantly.
It's that bloody company you keep buying things from. Isn't it? You are obsessed!
She eyes held mine, daring me to deny it.
I wanted to tell her she was wrong and that I wasn't hankering after yet the latest Positive Grid product. I mean, she was right in a way.
I had bought their first 40 watt amplifier. Which was splendid for a bit of noodling in the lounge.
Then they had bought out a smaller one which you know, was splendid for a bit of outdoor action.
And of course, then they had bought out the eeny weeny Spark Go. Who could resist such mini loveliness?
Then there was the guitar to computer interface, always important in this busy world of ours.
Fuck, she was right. I was obsessed.
Alright, alright. They have a new amp out and I want one. Fuck sake man, I am addicted to the fuckers ok?
I kicked the leg of the kitchen table petulantly.
It's your blooming money, do what you want. As long as I get my lounge done.
The Good Lady trilled smugly thinking she had got me.
I looked at her and tapped my foot a little jiggily then smiled in return.
Yeah, cool. We can do both.
I smirked and turned to saunter from the kitchen.
Both? Really? How much money did you actually get?
Her voice rose in pitch behind me like a sea eagle tearing angrily at the carcass of something long dead.
I chuckled.
New amp here we come!
Almost pmsl at this opening salvo. I must try it on she who must be obeyed.
In the last 4-5 months 'we' have redecorated the whole house (with the assistance of people who actually know what to do) at great expense.
All I wanted was a tele style guitar from Harley Benton but the frowns from swmbo were enough to turn molten lead into icicles.
I'll try your technique and see if it works on swmbo. 😂😂🎶🎸👍🏼
Edit: swmbo ®️©️💥💸😂💰👍🏼
Haha, I know. It's blummin tough. Doctrines the thing you want isn't even that expensive and it is still met with frowns and growling!!! 🤣🤣
Yep it's one of the mysteries of life. 😂💰💸👍🏼
Well played sir. Initially I thought you were too honest for your own good when your only reason was because they're new. But you sucked the good lady into a false sense of confidence and made her give the approval anyways. The ending sequence was just the cherry on top.
I do think that since you worked hard for the bonus, you should buy something for yourself. In the end it seems everyone's happy. Congrats on the new amp.
That's exactly what I think. I'm happy to sacrifice it all for the family but it's nice when I get a kickback!! 😀😀
If you like "kickbacks" you'll love reading my Blogs...
Lol, I am sure I might!
Shot to the foot, chasing fillies hooves, tread carefully.
Addicted to amplifiers now that is another crazy electronics head talking, you can't use them all at the same time, holidays that's what spare cash goes, great escape!
Your good lady obviously knows you well...., too well !LOLZ
Fillies hooves... 🤣🤣
Sometimes I horrify myself!!
Tis true you can't play them all at once, I will be selling something as I love a holiday!!
We all enjoy getting out of dodge, only way normally is a little sacrifice on pre-loved goodies....
I love selling stuff, It feels almost like you are getting money for nothing as you conveniently forget you paid for it and are selling it for less :OD
With inflation today and the poor quality always try get something back. Our memories definitely not always good, how we saved to obtain in the first place.
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LOL! This is great. I like the simple alternation between standard and italics, the dialog is perfectly preserved without loads of extra shite (like there is when I write).
I've also long-appreciated your artwork. It's extremely striking, and you manage to be so consistent about creating unique works for each post...I have followed your work for a couple of years now and taken much inspiration from your persistent style of formatting and layout...I apologize for waiting this long to engage and tell you this...but hell yeah man, and glad you got that new amp!
Cheers man, that's really nice to hear!
I have said before but sometimes doing the artwork is my favourite bit! But I do like telling the tales!
I successfully got the thing, now I just have to wait till it ships... In September dammit!
I can tell! Your work was the inspiration for the Name that Tune episode covers. But I was afraid it would be difficult to keep up the regular schedule with consistency, so I actually recorded and scheduled every contest up through 2026, way back in like 2022/2023. It was an effort of great organization, because i recorded all the episodes edited down the footage and saved the videos, then went back and spent a few weeks making the art - all so i could make sure i held consistency without skipping a beat…anyway, yours is a tough act to follow in that regard, i may or may not pick up NTT for another season after 2026, we’ll see…but all my templates i now use were initially inspired by your consistent/awesome format and style. Not ass kissing i swear, just calling it like it is.
I hate the wait man, i feel ya! Ive had some didgeridoos and flutes come from other parts of the world…in fact, the double Native American flute I call Blod Ravnene, used in the 19th NTT contest (still unsolved ;) came from Russia, and took forever because the lady only built it after I paid, and then shipping was an eternal nail biter…I get anxious waiting on shipments lol
At any rate man, I’m stoked to hear about it when it comes in! …I usually only see text posts from you, but you have a fancy guitar 2 PC thing…do you post audio or video anywhere? You’re probably like a professional studio musician on half the movie soundtracks of our time or something ridiculous, just making sick art and stories on the side for kicks…
Fucking hell. Till 2026? That is some dedicated work right there! I am glad I could inspire something, that's a fine old compliment. I have had compliments before on my artwork and a fair share of people going berserk with the hate over it. It takes all kinds so I dont mind but I do prefer the positive over the negative! 😀
That flute sounds like something else. I have to go have a look... Blod Ravnene - love the name!
I dont actually record stuff. I am too cheap, well, since I had kids I am to get a decent rig to record things. Mostly the stuff I record is straight off the phone amateurish. I was in a band that did ok and recorded some shnizz but I wouldn't say my playing is great, I just about get by!
I've actually seen one instance of the "berserk hate" - not to drudge up old bullshit, but I honestly got a laugh out of it as I'd tend to assume you must have - but it was this post's mention of your alleged satanic artwork that led me to think...I gotta go see the artwork that's getting all this hype! ...and the rest you already know lol
Thanks! It may not be correct...I named it using a translator app; it's supposed to be (I think) Norwegian for "The Blood Ravens". It's pretty metal.
Same. If I record, it's via the phone - which these days can be pretty decent quality. Although once, when my youngest was around two, she slobbered all inside the mic opening on the phone and completely wrecked my sound quality. Kids are fun 🤣
You can't beat a bit of metal! :OD Blood Ravens is awesome!
Aye, satanic artwork. Lol. I think that guy had me as the secret boss of Hive! I was like, oh aye, I am just a dude from Scotland but oh no. I was in with thee CIA and everything. What a prick he was. I do like to laugh at the idea of someone coming to my posts for the satanism and finding nothing like it. The post he keeps referring to as well was me talking about my missus working on New Years day :OD
HAHAHA!!! Yeah the whole thing seemed like a desperate grab - and yeah I do recall you were slotted as at least one of the leaders of the dark cabal, if not the dark overlord…I think he was peanut butter and jealous of your wit and general popularity ;)
Nothing like a good aul amp. Never steered away from Marshall. Must have a gander at these ones
Marshall will always be the daddy but these ones are smashing for playing in the house and not pissing off every man and his dog :OD
Tit for tat. You sure have mastered how this marriage thing works. Lol. Those amps look very cool, I've never heard of the brand. I really messed up when I bought my acoustic a few years ago. I should've sprung for the model that you can also play amplified. If I ever get any good I'll have to be trading up.
Of had, I did that with my first acoustic. Loved it but it was only a short time before I realised that everybody else was plugging theirs in!!
Sorted it with my next one 😀😀
If I can pick mine up more than once every few weeks I might think about upgrading. The electric/acoustic hybrid was only about $100 more too!
I know, the difference in price is negligible almost. Get a spark, that way you will be playing every day!!
I just might have to trade up! : )
That’s an awesome looking guitar. I tried to learn the guitar I only got as far as learning the start to born in the USA by Bruce Springsteen haha. That was on acoustic. Happy new amp day haha
Hehe, its a good song to start with too!
That one in the pic is one of my faves, beast of a metal guitar! :O)
Looking forward to the first single of the "Sex Pythons"
It's gonna be a good one!! 🤣🤣
Familiar. 😄😄 I can relate to your wife.. My husband is obsessed with sound system too.. I need to do bargain to understand him well.😊
Hahah, yes it seems to be a thing! We do love our toys :OD
Hahaha.. yeah, and no remedy about that. I just accepted it. 😊
Well done you is all I can say to that. You are a shining beacon for all good ladies ot follow!
Thank you. 😊😊 I have no choice , I already signed a marriage certificate. 😄😄 Have a great day with your family .😊
That's why I always sign these things with an alias!
Hahaah, I had no idea.😄
For fuck sake, I about pissed myself when I read that.
Your good lady is about like mine. All is fair in love land until I go to drop some dough.
Hehe, aint that the truth. All la la la until you want to spend some of your own money :OD
A guy needs his toys. Women may buy less gadgets, but they tend to spend a lot on hair, clothes, toiletries etc. Mind you, all those amps could be seen as excessive. I've got my eye on some better cymbals. Got gigs coming up and need to sound good. Those things can be expensive. The joy of drums is that you can keep adding to the kit.
They do indeed have their own expenses which mount up!
The new one I am aiming for is a direct upgrade of the original so I might sell the original. I like the ones I have but the old original will probably go unused. It is a fine thing tho. The only real complaints about it were that it was a bit bassy but I quite like that.
You can never get to the end of adding to the kit! :OD
I actually just saw a review of that new amp and thought of you. I've got a couple, but hardly use them. My Roland was the cool modelling amp at the time, but things have moved on. Also got a proper valve amp, but that needs to be loud.
Yeah its the loudness that is the issue which is why I like these ones. I have a lovely vox valve amp which is awesome but as you say, it has to be sufficiently loud and doesn't sound as good low.
I am on it tomorrow. Twitching those fingers to buy!
Not sure about marrying a joiner or a plumber, but we need them in our life as I do nowadays :)
We do indeed. I wish I had more skills in those areas!! Then I wouldn't need them so much!!
If people like us didn't exist, the world would be a dark, empty void.
Kind of like space but without stars, planets and the likes.
A bland and grey emptiness that's what it would be.
We are the spark!! 😀😀
We are ✨
And if anyone says otherwise... It won't go well for them 🙂🙂
Muhahahaha!
😀😀
Both? Really? How much money did you actually get?
Subtract at least 60% then round down.. but under no circumstances are you to tell her the truth..
Don't worry mate, that's a formula I'm well used to! 😀😀
You've got a new and nice amp there haha, It's really hard to resist buying what you have put your interest in
It is indeed!! I hope they deliver it soon!!
You must be someone who loves music a lot and the Good Lady feels you care about your amplifier more than the lounge😅😅
You home is a comedy home😅😅😅
I do love music and the making of it!!
And of course, a bit of comedy 😀
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Similarly, after marriage, interesting things happen every day and it takes a lot of time for husband and wife to understand each other.
Especially if one of them is french!!!
You sex python you.
Look, I think you did everything right, the cat look, kicking the table leg,sex pythoning...I'd say you deserve it.
You're probably addicted to Positive Grid amps but it's better than being a fucken crack head.
I wonder if I could get some crack and smoke it through the grill of my little PG amp. Then I could be both!
I cannae wait, the presale opens tomorrow for early bird owner sorts. I know its all hype but it has made such a difference to my playing that I am truly excited!
Crack and amps man, a match made in heaven. I hope you're first in line to purchase, awsomosity such as yours should never be inhibited.
It's my fecking office day. Knowing my luck I will be dragged into some call and miss the first batch. I will go ape if that's the case!
If you miss it kill El Jefe, it'll make you feel better.
Killing him would brighten any day of the week 😀😀😀
Yeah, it'd make my day too...he sounds like someone that's needs a bit of killing now and then.
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New toy! Yaayyy
I don't even play an instrument and I'd buy that eeny weeny spark go. That thing is cool looking
It makes me laugh when I read what you say about cats. Nowadays people don't know what to do with these poor animals. They take them to shopping malls and the animals look nervous, they are not suitable to go there. And the dogs, the couples take them to their dates, well, the poor animal already knows a lot about the subject hahahaha.
The good lady expects something from you, take her to the mall, you already bought yours.
A hug
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