The insider scoop on my doomed mining operation
I have seen a lot of articles lately on the merits of mining crypto and the profits to be made and I thought: hey I can do this!
Now admittedly I am not the most technical of folk but still, how hard can it be? I thought.
So I set about starting my mining operation. First things first I set up three miners. I thought this the most diverse and therefore safe way to start earning. It cost forty bucks and a couple of bottles of whisky to entice them into thinking it was a good idea but the promised riches had dollar signs spinning in their eyes.
Day 1
The miners are in good spirits. At first there is some joking and fooling around but after a bit of shouting and prodding they start to sober up and realise this aint a game.
Gerry is the first to go down the hole and it gives me no small satisfaction to see the other two - Sam and Arnie follow, their head-lights bobbing into the tunnel followed by the distant sounds of their pickaxes striking rock.
Later they return and I feed them chilli and whisky before they throw themselves exhausted into their bunks
No profit/returns : Its cool, apparently it can be a few days before the cash starts rolling in.
Day 2
It took a while to get the miners out of their bunks. They were a bit gnarly this morning but I reminded them of the riches we would soon be reaping and gave them all a tot of whisky before sending them back down the shaft. Arnie grumbled about his back but a couple of swift kicks in the arse had him running down that hole.
I chortled. This mining lark was gonna make me rich. Bring on the crypto profit!!
End of shift: They returned early, a barrow of rocks behind them, chattering excitedly. We gathered round the barrow. Gerry held aloft a rock with some thick goldish streaks running through it. "We struck gold boss!"
I stared at the rock and a vein started to throb in my temple. "What the FUCK is this?!"
"Its gold boss?" Sam shuffled his feet nervously in the face of my rage.
"Does this look like ZCASH to you?" I spat? "Or Monero? Litecoin? Even that fucking Amp shit?"
"Boss its gold, there is loads down there. We gone and done it, we're rich!"
"JESUS H!!" I screamed. "ZCASH, I fucking sent you to mine ZCASH!! We could have been making 3 dollars a day and you come back with this shit?" I threw the rock at them, then in a frenzy started grabbing the other rocks and lobbing them at their heads. "Get outta here!! Git!!!!"
They ran. Just as well too as I had a fair old temper when my dander was tickled and boy was it tickled.
I closed the mine. A couple of days later some guy came along and offered me a hundred steem for the hole in the ground. Pfft, fool. I pushed him hard, got him up to 200 and handed it over to him. Har. Idiots everywhere!!!
Hahaha, you are right, gold is shait, it is so 1816, how could they not know one mining from the other, tsss...
Hehe, 1816! I like it!
:-)
Lol. That's the funniest thing I've read on Steemit for a while.
Cheers man, I had fun writing it!! Its more entertaining than the real story of my clapped out old pc earning 81 cents a day!
Funny post. Yeah well I guess I fell for the crypto mining prompt and got a funny story instead. But yeah I remember oh idk a year or so ago, maybe a couple, when I purchased two Radeon 7850's, and attached them to my Intel compatible motherboard, paired it with an Intel i3-2120 and a small amount of RAM and started creating batch files, lurked the forums and got myself up to 700+hps (Mhps?). I ran it pretty much everyday for a good two months going between mining litecoin then switching to dogecoin where I got over a million coins. Remember when everyone thought those dogecoins were the second coming of Bitcoin based on a single sale? Yeah that was me. I was so happy I got in on a good coin. I jumped around basically daily to mine different cryptocurrencies seeing as this increased the chances of possibly hitting a good one that stuck. These were the pump and dump days. I had upwards of, and still do, around fifty or so wallets. But none of those had what we have here in STEEMIT. I the pain. I try to post and wrestle with is this worth my time, is this going to pan out in a year or so? But I do. I do because this is a social network of well...us. It is for those who can't catch the trending coin and transfer it to Bitcoin. It's for those who purchased hard to find efficient GPU's and trying to keep them cool and quiet. It is for those of us who know what this stuff even is. What crypto means, if I even do...I'm not sure. But this can, I believe, be somewhere that is unique for those who game on PC's, build PC's, know the intricacies of creating .bat's, try, fail and keep going because we deep down believe in a concept. That countries currencies are debt notes. That we are increasingly becoming P2P. Realizing globalization is happening and are concerned that we may have no stability in dollars or Euro's or things that are not silver or gold, food or ammo. It is paper and its unlimited. Coins are not. We can do what we want and the more we believe and convince one person to join we are creating our own destiny. No currency exchanges. Future proof encrypted and content rich. This is us. This is what we are aspiring to do. To be. To change the world one post and upvote at a time. So despite the rough times at least we can come here and commiserate. But let's do it everyday. Buy coins when you can spare a few bucks. Power up. Don't dash to cash a couple dollars. This is how we make it work. Together. Good laughs, making connections and bonds, giving poems, stories, commenting, being active...and yes, hating it the whole time. But hey, at least we can hope together.