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Maybe if we banned them from the Internet they'd be driven out by sheer boredom!

But they can't type outside!! They would melt!! Like a vampire in the sun!

But it won't matter if they can't get online anyway! Maybe we could dangle a functional modem on some fishing line, and use the old carrot for the mule trick!

Hahahaha!! A modem on a stick. I can actually see it in my mind eye!!