I know my term is so shocking. People who can read even the title itself might get confused of why I am using the term "ex-convict".
I am the only illegitimate child among the seven siblings. My mother was separated from her husband for many years before she gave birth of her 7th child and that is me. I never asked my mom the reason why she and her husband separated because for me I am not in the position to do that and I don't want to know it though. The only thing I knew was that her husband abused my mom that made her realized and decided to stay away from him because he was attempting to kill my mom which at that moment my mom carrying their 6th child in her womb.
My mom brought her 5 children and moved away to other place so that the husband couldn't find them. She took care of her children. She worked and worked just to feed and provide the basic needs of her children. Later on she worked in a rich family as housemaid just to earn some money for her children's survival. After some several years of working, she met a man(my father who was working as well in the rich family as driver) but the man has a family.
To make the story short, they committed mistake. Mother got pregnant so she decided to stop working to stay away from the man because she knew she got mistake. They never meet ever since I was delivered by my mom. I grew up without the presence of my father. Not even seeing his face nor picture of him. My mom never talked to me about him. As I grew up I felt like I was different from the kids around me. I was so shy because people might criticized me because of my history. I felt like I am imprisoned of my yesterday. I told myself one day, "if only I can see my father even once, I may become brave one to face the world."
Finally I met my father when I was 23 yrs old. I was filled with joy. I thought my father didn't care about me but I was mistaken because he said "I have been looking for you for many years but I think your mother hide you from me." Although I grew up without his presence he was very proud of me of how my mom brought me up as a good person despite the criticisms that comes along my way. One criticism that I couldn't forget was when my neighbor said " if her mother is disgrasyada then she will be too when she grows up". I kept that criticism not a hindrance but a challenged and as a guide to live a worthy life and prove to the people around me that their prediction is wrong.
I am not in my 40's yet still single doing the actions worthy to be emulated by young children. No matter how bad our experiences for as long as we know what is right and we corrected the wrong one.
I can say now that I am free from my yesterday's life moving on for a better tomorrow.