After battling a serious depression for countless years and things spinning out of control in such a HUGE way that in 2016, I attempted suicide on the 7th of October (perhaps when we know each other better I will write some pieces of the things leading up to that). After I returned from the hospital and being fed donuts by @princessmewmew and @morkrock, I decided a long bath and some serious thought was necessary. As with most people in these situations we turn to relationships, either romantic or spiritual, anything not to feel alone. So of course, as we all read/ saw Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, I decided a bathroom prayer was in order. Did I ask for health, happiness, peace of mind, nope Steemit, I prayed for a boy. At the worst time in my life, I decided the best thing for me was to be emotionally dependent of a dude.
So I had this list of everything I wanted:
He needed to make me laugh, he needed to be gentle, to love me unconditionally, to need ME, to adore me, to irritate me, to be at home when I get there in the evenings after a long day, to hold me and comfort me and to most importantly never leave or hurt me.
The universe/ God had a strange sense of humour! The very next day after this heartfelt plea I get a call from an amazing human being that I have seen through some tough times. Man, Steemit, I can't even begin to tell you how great this guy is, he saves sharks for a living. Magnificent as they may be (and my biggest phobia), they be damn scary and not exactly prom date material:
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So Jon, he tells me he has got this Turkish Angora and they are apparently terribly expensive, not from South Africa and they make very difficult house pets as they aren't really domestics and this cat is sickly and he remembered that I use to volunteer alongside my family for multiple animal shelters and if I would be so kind as to take this floof in for 9 days. Nine days will be the exact amount of time to save his life from being put down and the exact right amount of time for me to fall in love. Turns out prayers/ request are answered but in a strange twist of events the boy I was sent (alongside all the qualities I really wanted), was floofie, sickly just like me and a lil lost- we were perfect for each other! You know how they say when you know, you just know? Well, we knew. It took months of special diets, grooming and treatments to get the sundamage, insects, catflu and trauma out of my lil guy's system, but WE DID IT! As much as I saved his life, he saved mine too, slowly but surely the waves of overwhelming emotions became shorter, the elephant sitting on my chest disappeared, I found myself laughing at all the lil things that made life with him special and together we HEALED:
Here are some tips to lead a great, healthy, happy life that worked for us both:
Most importantly fall in love, with everything life has to offer, as often as you can! Fall in love with beauty and music, art and every lil thing that moves you, fall in love with yourself and find someone that will fall in love with you exactly as you are!
oh gosh this is just too cute for words. I am so glad mister floofyballs came and loved you. You are totally lovable, and special and we are so pleased you chose to stay present in this life
We love you so much
Remember Dis?
I can't thank that crazy family of yours enough for loving me and supporting me and driving me bonkers!
Hope this past will not able to interrupt your future happiness. Also, the tips were awesome and happy to see your pet maintain it though I can't follow most time :) within short life, we need to do something to leave a sign of ourselves in the earth. Thanks to these two nice people who are there with your life journey.
Depression, like with any mental illness, will always be present, but you can change your lifestyle and not allow it to overwhelm or influence you. I absolutely agree with leaving a sign of ourselves on the earth, the way I choose to do that is to love people and be there for them so that when I am not here anymore one day, they will carry on loving me and thinking about me - that way you never really die <3 I am blessed to have the most incredible people in my life <3
So what is it with you? Do you always reach right inside of people? This quick?
Cleo. A name I haven't written since the day she died. A cat. My cat. 18 years she stuck with me, outlasting two ex wives. She hated everything and everybody but me. My kind of girl.
Now I have to tell her story. It's mostly complex and unknown. Hell, I'm only guessing at some of it.
Thanks for the look at you and Sir Mews.
Hey BigT! Your message made me tear up a lil! I wanna read this untold story, please let me know when you are able and get the words on paper just right, it took me a few hours and many changes to express in my silly nature the way this purring Prince saved me. It took me looking at him daily, whenever I felt like I didn't wanna be here, to realize if I leave then he will be alone in this world. I didn't want us to be alone ever again, now everyday I get home he is there just as I prayed, waiting to snuggle, annoy and love me. If you and Cleo had the life I think in my heart you have, she is a story worth sharing and I really really wanna read it <3 <3 <3 Don't you think this Steemit situation is beautiful you find strangers around the globe and all of a sudden they become the most important people in your life! Virtual Family <3
What a touching story girl !!! I'm sorry to hear the sad part, but I'm glad to hear about the happy ending ;)))
And this is some damn good advice...if only we could actually follow those few simple steps towards happiness ... sigh
Oh, and CAT <3 <3 <3
Hey guuurll!!! So when you say the word CAT you activate the "get a free cat pic" sequence! Congratulations! As for my story, I think because I have always been a happy person to the world outside it was difficult for people to understand where it all came from, but I am incredibly blessed to be able to be here today :) I find the easiest way to take these steps, is to have a cat, when they eat you eat, when they sleep- you have to sleep cause when you wanna sleep they don't haha!! So basically, get all the CATS!
Oh my God I had no idea about the CAT picture mode !!!! What a cuuuuutie!!!! <3 <3 <3 <3
And yeah, even though I don't have one myself, I get the point - maybe I should, soon <3
What a cutie that cat of yours is and thank you for your heartfelt look into the most private moments of your life. Depression and mental health can be debilitating and not enough people know how hard it can be to cope. I am so glad that you have people in your life that are there to support you and let you know how special you are. Thank you again for sharing. The more we talk about these struggle then the more people can understand.
Thank you for the positive feedback and for making me feel welcome to talk about these things. <3
sighs beautiful.
Thank you
Well if you are ever sad or need a CAT fix lemme know I have 10 000's of these photos <3