How could a single name bring pain to a little child? That’s what I always wondered about since childhood days. When I was born, neither my mom or my dad have prepared a name for me. But my twin brother names already been decided since my mom had a dream seeing someone telling her my brother name. In cases like this, we believe that we should name the child the same name that been mentioned in the dream or the child will have an unfortunate life. Unfortunately, my mom doesn't know if my name was mentioned in the dream or not. In the day of birth, my mom was sleeping due to the surgery that she had to do. The hospital wanted my mom to name us at that moment since there was a lot of twins birth at that day and they don’t want to mix all these babies together without names. They called that day on March 14, 1996, as Twins Day. My father wasn’t there at the moment to take that decision for my name. So, since my grandmother was there, she decided to name me as her name.
How The Pain Start Growing
If you get to the real meaning of my grandmother name which is Bahiga, it actually means ‘ The person who always smile ‘. But unfortunately, that wasn’t the case for me. At the age of two, I was in kindergarten and I still remember how children used to treat me back then. My name was considered as an old lady name, and all children used to make fun of me and my name. My mom saw me multiple time coming home with tears hanging in my eyes. Sometimes I keep crying for a good amount of time and then I stop.
One day, mother came in and start asking about the reason for me to shed tears every time. I told here how kids are making fun of me and leaving me all alone in school. She gets shocked and next day she heads to the building to take with teachers about that matter. She tried to make teachers talk with kids about it but really nothing changes for days. My mom kept seeing her child sad faces almost every day.
You know, kids remember harmful things in their childhood, I still remember how I used to approach kids aiming for friendship. they used to push me away until I get thrown in the ground. One day, I approached a boys group playing together with a ball and tried to join them. But one of the kids pushed me away and laugh about my courage to approach them. I felt so isolated every time I decide to make a step forward and I was only two years old. What really make me laugh about this incident is the kids who pushed me away lost their ball after seconds and they can’t get it anymore. I laughed so much at that time and no one can blame me for that. Mother wasn’t able to change my name just because she didn’t want to make her mother sad since she’s the one who named me and on top of that it’s her name.
Finally Decides To Change The Name
As a mother, you can’t let your child suffer infant of you because you will suffer too. Mother couldn’t take it anymore and said t my grandmother “You want to be sad go ahead because I can’t see my child suffering like that without doing anything about it. I don’t want my child to grow up blaming me for having a lonely future like that.”
Mother start searching for a suitable name for me, and she actually found one. She informed my dad and they start the process of changing it. They got all the necessary paper for the department who’s responsible for changing names. When the applied for the application and sent the papers it gets rejected immediately with a stupid reason. My family picked another name, and it gets rejected gain. My mom couldn’t take it anymore and started picking a random name just to change the current one. But all that effort went with the wind and my name couldn’t be changed. We couldn’t understand why the application was getting rejected every time.
My grandfather (God bless him) used to lie down on a bed that placed on the roof top of the house. I also used to to do that with him most of the nights. We would look straight to the sky and watch the stars glowing with the wind. One day of those days, my mom was coming to pick me up from my grandfather house and I was on the roof. When she reached the door she overheard me talking to him. I was laying down pointing my finger to the moon and saying these words “That’s me, that’s me”. When my mother heard those words, she thought to herself and said: “Yeah, this kid always talk about the moon and always point toward it, so why not naming her ‘Moon’?” In my country, we call the moon ‘Qamar’, so they decide to make a last try and submit the request for changing the name. Guess what, they accepted after two years of trying to change my name. It was a happy news for the whole family. At the time, my days in kindergarten ends, and the days for the elementary school came with a refreshing start for a child that suffer from having a name that was capable of bringing her pain.
BUT, it wasn’t the end of her story, another form of pain showed up with the new start that she begin…
TO BE CONTINUE…
#life #story #childhood #bullying #steemit [ #human #nature ]
Children can be very cruel sometimes. They don't realize what others might be feeling. I have few younger siblings, and they do not restrain themselves in any way when they play, which is why it often results in tears.
I'm sorry you had to go through this, but they were just kids. They were too young to realize what they are doing.
Wish you all the best, Qamar :)
Thank you :) . I won't blame any one at such an age. They were kids as you said and nothing can be done about it.
I think that the name do not plays a major role in our lives. It's how you'll manifest itself. With interest I will read the sequel. Good luck to you!
Thank you. As you said the name was just an excuse for kids to play around. Name doesn't make a person but it point out a specific individual. I will complete the story soon ^^.
Thank you for open up and sharing this story, im sorry, some children are so mean.. I would really like to read more from you
Thank you, I will be completing my story with kids until this day.
Don't think it was the name either... I never went to kindergarden. In school I had a hard time making real friends, because I had developed my own set of principles and morale which I might add were far more superior to my classmates at the time, looking back now. But I was lonely and considered somewhat of an outsider always. I was bullied until like half-way through high school for having long hair for instance. People are real dicks sometimes. Think it has changed me in a sense that I'm constantly on guard and see the world in a more pessimistic way.
There was also name-picking, but all I could do is suck it up and just go along with it. Others were picked on as well. My name is weird too.
...I don't think changing your name improved things much, right?
It's true. When I complete the whole story you will conclude that anything could bring you problems. Really, changing my name at the end didn't benefit me in anything. Until the age of 4 when finally my name get changed, the only thing that I gained is growing up mentally faster than normal. Which really fade all the childhood fun days that a kid should be enjoying.
A child's name can really factor largely how others will judge them as well as how the child will perceive themselves.
While this may help create a negative self image, it can also help the opposite through self examination. I know a guy whose last name is "Geik". Growing up he was very ashamed of his name and felt much pain from ridicule. His family went on a vacation to the town where his grandparents live. He saw that the Geik name was very respected in that town and it gave him an entirely different perspective on who he was and greatly increased his self worth.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me. I know exactly that the name really doesn't matter and who you are is more important. But sometime stuff like this really give others a reason to mess with people. I really can't blame kids because they still only kids.