It was the early 90s and we had just gone through another armed robbery attack in the middle of the night. My mum had been taken around the house and she had been beaten up as the robbers sought to get as much money and valuables as they could make her reveal.
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My dad had felt helpless as he listened to the cries of my mum but his spinal cord injury and complete paralysis from his neck down prevented him from doing anything to stop it. The male carer had been told to hide in the roof as who knows what the robbers might do if they felt under threat from a big man like him.
The rest of us had all been huddled up in a room, waiting for this current crazy episode to be over and praying hard that no one would be permanently hurt this time. There was fear in all hearts, definitely in mine.
And so, it was hardly any surprise that my parents decided to ask in the local juju person to come give us a potion to ensure our safety going forward, EXCEPT we were a ‘christian’ family — Surely we did not do such things! The carer mentioned that a potion had been added to breakfast that morning. It was to be hidden so that we would not question it but he had seen it happen. So, I did not eat the breakfast.
Why Do I Share This Story?
Though this kind of thing is not commonplace for most people in developed countries (or at least it is given a different name), it is an example of what happens when fear is allowed to control your next moves.
When fear reigns, one does all kinds of things that can keep them from their destiny. Fear makes a fool out of everyone and it is critical that fears are brought out into the light and faced so that they are not undermining your values and your true design.
Let’s talk about 7 fears you will regret not facing if you want to live the free, fulfilled, abundant life (Deliberate Life) that you desire.
1) FEAR OF LETTING GO OF YOUR CURRENT LIFE/LIFESTYLE
For too long, I held on to the concept of being a pharmacist and then I held on long to ACTUALLY being a pharmacist because it seemed more secure, it seemed more predictable and it was the reasonable thing to do.
Except I wanted more.
There would be no ‘MORE’ until I let go of my current life. You have to create space for the ‘MORE’ and that can be scary.
Fear tells you that what you have is as good as it is going to get and you had better be thankful for it and settle into it.
Deliberate People Let Go. They make the transition, even though afraid. they step out little by little from the comfort zone until they get where they want to go or they take the leap all at once. It does not matter which way it is done, as long as it is done.
AFFIRM with me: My Best Is Yet to Come. There are much better things ahead for me.
2) FEAR OF YOUR HIGHER POWER’S INTENTION
For a long time, I was scared that if I completely surrendered to my higher power then I would be forced to do things that I did not want to do in order to prove my loyalty. And so I held back, I refused to listen to the intuitive nudges, I kept living from my experience. And that kept me capped.
Deliberate People KNOW that the things they desire in their heart of hearts have been planted in them by their creator so they will never be asked to do what they do not want to do. They may be afraid of taking action but it will always be towards the thing they truly desire.
AFFIRM with me: The Divine has plans to prosper me: To give me hope and a great future.
3) FEAR THAT YOU ARE ALONE
Somewhere deep inside, even though you claim to be spiritual, you may fear that actually you are alone and that it is all a figment of your imagination, particularly if you have been through a hard time and you felt abandoned. And so, you live from reason, logic, experience because you think you have to. Yes, you have the words, you show up at your religious organisation but ultimately, you fear that you are alone.
This fear keeps you trapped within your experience to date and that of people who have taught you. You cannot trust the intuitive nudge and so, you stay stuck in what you expect to experience.
Seeming miracles happen ONLY when you trust that deep wisdom within you enough to act on it. Do whatever you need to do to heal the ‘false separation’ wound. It is critical.
AFFIRM with me: I have an unfair advantage. I know I am not alone
4) FEAR OF OTHER PEOPLE’S INTENTIONS
I learn early on to be wary of people, even the ones that loved me. They sometimes did things to hurt me and they might even have thought it was for my own good. Cousins got my confidence and then reported my thoughts to my parents who then punished me. ‘Friends’ deserted me when some other person seemed to be more able to get them what they wanted.
Trusted adults proved untrustworthy in their dealings with me and other people. All these things made me very untrusting of people.
The problem arises when you are always looking for the catch. You cannot see a good opportunity when it is staring you in the face because you are scared of the intentions of some person or the other. You hide away, worried that everyone is out to get you in some way.
AFFIRM with me: Nothing and No one can keep me away from what is mine so I choose to show up fully in the world, expecting good things.
5) FEAR OF TRUSTING YOURSELF
For a few years after going bankrupt, I could not trust myself. I felt I was a mistake making machine and so I did not act on any intuitive nudges, I did not pursue any of my vision, I just gave up on myself and did the bare minimum to get by.
NOT GOOD.
the truth is, your vision is not given you to taunt you. You have what it takes to bring it to life as long as you choose to take action. I did not take action for a while until I finally woke up and chose to step onto the deliberate life path — one that followed my true design. Mistakes happen. They are not who you are.
AFFIRM with me: I am born for more and I am EXACTLY the person to bring it to life.
6) FEAR OF EXPOSURE
As a result of my early years, I learnt how to protect myself, stay hidden and put on a front. Building a vision demands that you allow your true self to show up and that has been hard for me. I was so scared that I would not be acceptable or even that people would come out of the woodwork and ‘get’ me and so I just wanted to talk AT people rather than share my heart.
I have overcome this a lot as I do tend to reveal a lot about myself if I feel it will support another’s growth but there is still room for more.
Too many people would rather stay hidden and NOT live out their true vision than expose their hearts on social media. I see people using icons or random pictures instead of their actual face in their profile pictures all because of this fear of exposure. People with their private accounts on instagram which is all cool, unless you are someone with a message and a calling to build an entrepreneurial or creative or ministry venture then it is imperative that you get over this fear and learn to trust that you are fully taken care of. Social media is not going anywhere, anytime soon so choosing to stay hidden will not work if you are committed to living out the calling on your life. I learnt this and had to act accordingly.
Other times, people refuse to get support because they are scared of being exposed but then they stay unhealed and unhelped. Pity.
AFFIRM with me: Nothing and No one can take what is mine from me, so I can show my true self boldly. Every good thing comes to me now.
7) FEAR THAT THE VISION IS TOO BIG
Yep, it may seem huge from your limited perspective. However, it is not true. You are EXACTLY the person to bring your vision to life, as long as you choose to commit to it.
Will you?
AFFIRM with me: I am capable of my calling and I choose to live it out now.
And there you have it, 7 fears to give up if you want a life of abundance, freedom and fulfilment — The DELIBERATE LIFE.
Want to explore it more? STEP 1 is to read or listen to a free copy of my book — PRAY. AFFIRM. RECEIVE — How to get clear, stay clear and take action to get what you want out of life — RosemaryNonnyKnight.com/bookgift
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STOPIncredible story! Glad you lived to tell it, and turn it from an injury to a point of strength!