One of the things I recently read which had a really profound impact on me, philosophically speaking, was this statement, “Life doesn’t come with a manual.” It might seem obvious, but for some reason, the meaning behind it meant a lot to me.
Suddenly I realised that life is a blank slate, an empty book, waiting for you to write you story into it one page at a time and one day at a time. There is no such thing as destiny or a grand plan. You make things up as you go!
It is such a powerful realisation that life can be anything you can make of it. Sure, some are better off in a number of ways since birth than the others and that makes things a lot easier for them but history stands proof that no matter your start point, your end point can be defined by you.
All of us are a part of this society and we contribute to it in a number of ways, making a living in the process. But in my experience and from what I hear and see, most people aren’t doing with their lives what they really want to and are simply acting as reluctant cogwheels in the machine. Today I want to explore the reasons why.
1. Self-Doubt
I think this one has to be one of the top reasons why people don’t pursue a dream career. We all have specific set of skills that are quite unique to us and I believe that everyone has at least one such thing that they can do really well.
However, to yourself, it might not seem that big of a deal and you might be underestimating your abilities. Sure, some friends might have said nice things about what you can do, but you just don’t get the feeling that you can make it into a career.
This self doubt acts as your shackle which doesn’t let you move forward one bit. In fact, it stops you from taking that very first, yet the most important step where you finally acknowledge what you have and decide for yourself that you are going to give it a shot, come what may.
2. Fear of Failure
Many people know and are aware that they are talented in a particular thing and they really love doing it. They are passionate about it, they enjoy it and it’s all they can think of, every single moment and would do anything to make something out of it.
Yet, it’s the lack of failure that can stop them dead in their tracks. Yes, we are all aware of a million things that can stand between us and our goals and it can be overwhelming, specially at the beginning. It’s natural to have a little fear.
But what is also natural is to have a little faith, a little more determination, and a whole lot of dreams and aspirations, all of which should be able to push you towards that journey you have always wanted to walk upon!
3. Other People’s Opinions
The world is a noisy place. There’s just too much distraction out there, but do you know what’s the most distracting thing? It’s other people’s opinions. Yes, everyone’s got them and literally about everything in the world.
Sometimes we have to take rarely walked upon roads in life to be able to achieve what we set out to. In a world full of herd mentality, that is almost like blasphemy and you will be subjected to all kinds of opinions, which is an understatement if you ask me.
If you let your inner voice get drowned by all that noise, you will never be able to achieve your dreams and it’s another top reason that holds people back. Take a look at history. If all the great people had listened to others and stopped, we wouldn’t be living in today’s world.
It’s true that self doubt doesn’t let you move on. That’s why people need strong and trustful person beside them, who doesn’t let grow self doubt too big, person who belives in you and is there for you all the time you need, who has power to kick you out from safe-zone.
But also you have to remember that you can not put too much expectation to others, they are not always beside you, only when they have time and when they won’t forget your existence...
Hard to find but..I belive they exist..
It strikes me as a lack of core philosophy in many. It's rare to find someone who can really answer me if I ask them "why do you get up in the morning" or "what change do you want to be in the world". Looking at my own life, I know it was only when I felt that I had my own answers to these questions that the desire to live up to my passion, purpose and drive would override all of the three points you mention above.
Nice input @fredrikaa also very on point...
Yes, most people are not sure about their own passions and that's a big problem. It's almost as if they want to be told what to do at every point of life instead of looking within and asking themselves what they want to do and what change the want to bring in the world.
Wow @sauravrungta you analysed this crucial issue very well with great points. Procrastination is another issue we have and when we can actually fight against it and stand up and proceed , then we will see more success. Thanks for sharing, upped and following you in order to stay in touch and send in my support.
Feel free to see my post on how the rich and broke can benefit from steemit. Happy weekend.
Thanks for the kind words :) Yeah, procrastination is another reason for sure!
You are welcome, always.
Everything you posted digs into the human psychology. Innately we are an animal that holds great value in survival and because of that innate instinct, we are very good at keeping things in its current state.
Self doubt exist to prevent us from doing something that creates uncertainty.
Fear of failure exist to prevent us from attempting something that creates uncertainty.
Other people's opinions reinforces the first two. Everything is about facing human instinct.
Likewise the ability to understand also allows you to utilize human instinct and maximize your effort. We are really good at projecting our ideas into the future and creating a fantasy. Once we no longer have unpredictability (by fantasizing our future) we begin to develop a great passion to achieve it since we believe it's real. It works great both ways! Great post!
Yes, I agree that some of these things are hard wired into us thanks to evolution, but things have changed. It's a whole new world where we live in today and we need to sometimes overcome our most basic instincts to achieve something in life.
Overcome is a good way to put it. I don't think we can change this instinct without many many years of consecutive behavioral adjustment. Each person is so unique, and so everyone will have a difference experience because the environment keeps changing, hence its difficult to consistently build a new mental framework over many generations. You just inspired me to write something about that very topic!!
Wow... Nice comment @motoengineer love your own submissions to this philosophical post
I agree that we all can make life what we wanted it to be, but I don't agree that there is no such thing as destiny. We all have free will, and I am choosing to comment on your post. However, it was destiny that brought me to this post, it was destiny that I joined steemit a few weeks ago so our paths could virtually cross etc. I believe we all have what it takes to be who we want to be, but how things play out has to align with what our creator has planned; his is the great plan. I find that human beings can be so delusional sometimes that we mistake our abilities to do things as if we have the ultimate power. For example, many people work hard all their lives, (more than you and I probably) and have self-belief, but opportunities either never come their way, or their plans are not aligned with God's plans. On the other hand, you have people who work fairly hard, or not at all, but achieve success through no particular efforts of their own. How do we explain that? We call it luck. To me, I know it as destiny. We as human beings can do more than we think we can, but since we are weak and cannot even command our hearts to beat or to stop beating, or stop our brains from overthinking, we are not self-sufficient and thus not the masters of our lives, but editors.
We will just have to agree to disagree on that part then :)
Agree :)
Very philosophical post... Got me thinking... Great post @sauravrungta ... Life truly doesn't come with a manual... Nice one and keep it up...
Thank you :)
welcome as always and do find time to check my blog post too
welcome and find time to check my blog posts too
regards
I have spent 20 years of my life on a hamster wheel I hated being on the entire time. Why waste your life doing something you hate? We only have one life. Do something you love with the time you have instead.
One of the saddest things about humanity is that the people closest to you are often your worst enemy. Your friends and family will be the top people saying things like "that will never work" and "stick with what's safe."
They will hold you back if you let them. Don't.
Your true friends will support your passions. They know what you love of course, and they wouldn't be your real friend if they didn't want to see you happy. Misery loves company as the saying goes too.
So true..life in the 'Safe Zone' is just an illusion. The satisfaction of walking the path of self determination is acutely tangible. Seems like those close to you might be projecting. I'd say it's your lack of fear that they fear the most.
Yeah, life is short and you simply can't waste it. Also, I agree that the closest people can sometimes end up being the worst enemies as their love for you would result in you staying 'safe' inside the comfort bubble which doesn't get results in the real life scenarios.
Very important article. These things should be educated in school. nice greetings from Vienna.
Chris
Thank you :)
Hey .Good Post My Friend . From My Expereance I Can Say That All What You Mentioned Above Have One Basic Our Brain Algorithm . In Basic You Can Devide Yourself In 2 Parts . Subjective You And Objective You . Subjective You Is Emotions And Basic Survival Of You . Objective You Are YOU. You Can Call It Rational You . It Is What You Call-It Is Me . So Basicly All Problems Above Are Subjective Part Of You . Witch Is Defensive Mechanism Of Your Brain . Doubts ,Fear Of Failure ,Other People Opinion Is Risk Of Making You Feel Bad . So Brain (Subjecive Part ) Is Making Those Up,So You Don't Do It And Eliminate Risk Of Geting Hurt . Long Story Short You Can Overcome It By Getting Know Yourself ,Till The Level Were You Devide Those Two . And In That State You Can Make Yourself Do What Ever You Want . :)) It Works For Me And It Is Only My Subjective Though .
Very important article. These things should be educated in school
Thank you for the kind words :)
LOVE THIS! Self doubt is a big one. For a long time I didn't write because I thought I had really poor writing skills, and I was also worried that I would be judged for it. But once I just went for it, it is actually really empowering. The hurdle can prevent us from growing, but once you jump, I think it makes you just that more confident and stronger.
Yes, as they say, you just have to take the leap of faith and then things start unfolding automatically from there on. So important that first step.
:) yup the first step is always the hardest. Then it just gets better from there.
hi hi! I just hit 1000 followers and I featured in my blog. Just wanted to let you know that I really really appreciate all of your awesome blogs and you have been a big inspiration on my Steemit journey. Thank you!
In my opinion, the main source is having the fear of other people's opinions :)
Yes, in today's world, that's a big one!!
It's hard for most people to escape from that. It requires putting down the ego.
I really feel many people are affected by negative people around them. What others think seem to matter more than what they think. That is what holds them back. People are sometimes negative because they have resentment or jealousy.
Yes, it is a big problem in today's world. Negative people are abound and they make the most noise, unfortunately.
Well these are the noises that ought to be shut out.
Do what you love always. I picked money over happiness and it was not worth it. Currently working to change that.
As they say, if you do what you love, you will love what you do!! haha
This is true, my friend. I learned the hard way.
YES!! You are so right on this. I let self doubt and others opinions control what my life was about and now at 36 I am finally going towards my dream and not the dream of someone else's.
Good to hear that :) It's never too late.
Есть еще одна вещь - это лень! Иногда ее трудно победить.
I like this post!!! Very straight to the point :)
Guys, you should remember this:
"If one person can do it, you can learn how to do it
This assumption is simple, if any one in the world producing a certain result, you also, with the same thinking, information and set of actions/behaviors can learn how to do it and produce a similar result."
This is a sentence from my last post I'm sure you will like it since we all liked this post ^^
@paps
That's so true. Everyone has the intelligence to understand and be whatever they want to.
Interesting. I would like to offer that the focus of this post should be on what you love versus what is holding you back. It feels as though confident, successful people do the things they love and others are left longing. The key difference is that people that do things they love, love the things they do. So it's not a question of what is holding you back. The question is how do I love myself and things around me. Dreams can never be reached until they are recognized and vetted through reality. In this reality, one mustn't look for "more" to be content. They must look for love itself. Ultimately, we are saying the same thing differently. Great post. I enjoyed reading.
Different ways of looking at it :)
awesome saurav bhai
Thanks!! :)
@sauravrungta Very important acticle. This acticle is very important for Indian people Because India is a developing country and Here's most of the people belong from small town and village. It's not that They aren't intelligent and They can't do something but reason is that They don't want to do that what they can perfectly. But Why, Why They don't want to do? There is also some reasons behind it what you ( @sauravrungta ) described beautifully. You described all the point very openly and I want that these point should be teach in the schools and colleges so that The fear of Billions Indian run away and They could do what they want to do. Indians have very talent but due to hasitation and fear They don't. Thanks @sauravrungta for sharing this wonderful blog and upvoted, resteemed and followed you to get updates.
The herd mentality is very strong in India. Therefore we can see that there is a lot of competition for just a few jobs and most students go for particular courses while considering their education despite having unique talents of their own. It's like this fear of failure and the want of a safety net is inculcated among the Indian children from the very beginning, which must be changed. Instead, teach your children to value their dreams and pursue them no matter what.
Exactly right bro I'm very happy to read this. Thanks.
This post really hits home. I find that self-doubt and procrastination are likely my biggest drawback. Thing that gets to me is I know how to fix them but I don't. Sound dumb but I try to say to myself 'I know I can ...' to overcome my hesitation, sometimes it works. Insightful post, thank you.
Yeah, procrastination is a great hurdle too. Seeing yourself do things in the future is very toxic. One needs to see oneself do things in the present.
I'm working at it.
Your word melted my heart and thought me so many thing i have never image in my life.am very grateful for this your post.how i wish i have mentor like you on time.i wouldn't be in the same level by now.upvoted
Thank you so much for those kind words. I really appreciate them :)
I think in India option 3 matters the most ki log kya kahenge.
hahaha yeah!! This fear in Indians needs to get ridden of. It is one of the biggest hurdles here.
Im just lazy as ... to start sth . lol Much needed motivation, cheers mate and glad to connect.
Hahah me too! :P Thanks for the kind words :)
Knowing is just the first step. When you can see what you are doing wrong, you then need the will power and motivation to follow through. I wish it was easy but this is one of hardest things i need to conquer.
That's right. Realisation is always the first step.
@sauravrungta amazing blog loved I and upvoted too. I have written a blog like this before may be you want to read and upvote if you like. I hope you will surely read thanks
https://steemit.com/story/@diverse-thinker/one-clap-that-changed-everything
Money is the root of the evil. Many people think they need to have enough money to stop doing what they don't like before they can do what they like.
What is enough? and after enough sometimes, they realized they don't know what do they like.
if we listen to wat other ppl think we not be able to achieve what we want
Thanks!