You keep saying all the neighbours are wanks but maybe you are just being too harsh on them?
The are mostly fuckers, at least mine are. Old Bitch (lives next door) moans when I park in front of her house on a public highway. She's had the cops and traffic officers over to be told to fuck off... but still knocks on my doors and tells me to move it.
That's what most of mine are like. They should and say hello but then would knife you in the back as soon as look at you!! People are weird about parking. If it ain't got double yellows it's fair game!
The bloke across the road wont talk to me as I chased his son to his house (a kid then) for knocking on my door in 1998.., 25 years ago and he still holds a grudge.., fucking dick!😀
That's insane! I think you win the prize of the shittest neighbours!