" The child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth ". -African Proverb
We all carry a wounded inner child inside of us. This fragile child may once have been to war when he wasn’t equipped to do so. As a result, he’s collected scars. And while scars may slowly fade away with time, we never truly lose them. They become a part of us. Healing isn’t a linear process. It is one long and difficult road paved with obstacles along the way. Putting our inner child first - and loving him through and through no matter what comes our way - is the most important promise we can make to ourselves during this journey.
One of the most painful realizations I’ve made throughout my healing journey is that some types of pain never fully go away. And in a way, knowing this can help us to get comfortable with the fact that pain is an inherent part of life. To seek a life without it is not possible. Human existence will always entail suffering. We may never be free of pain - but with time and healing- we can become greater than it.
Healing your broken inner child is a lifelong journey. It requires first and foremost an important dose of self-awareness. To be aware of the patterns that we’ve been carrying all the way into our adult years. Our way of relating to ourselves and to the world around us stems from the beliefs we’ve internalized as children.
We need to reparent this fragile child inside of us. To gift him with unconditional love. To offer him unlimited protection. To give him the space to be. Bust most of all, to promise him that we will never abandon him. We ought to give him everything we perhaps never received as a child ourselves.
In a world of constant distraction and stimulation - it’s all too easy to dismiss the signs that we need to heal our own heart. Covering one’s pain is too often the choice most make. Life has showed me firsthand how doing so is a very dangerous way to live by. Like an iceberg, mistaking the surface for the bottom can lead to an ultimate brutal collision. It’s a risky bet to wait until the worst case scenario unfolds to address all the hurt we’ve accumulated inside of us.
The stakes are high when the survival of our own precious inner child is on the line. It’s a shame no one ever taught us how crucial it is to be gentle and compassionate toward ourselves. After all, the way we treat the most vulnerable and damaged parts of ourselves will be reflected by the way we react when our own brokenness collides with the one of another being.
Take a trip down memory lane. Do you remember when was the first time your inner child got hurt? Did you let him express that pain or did you suppress it?
It is never too late to cleanse your soul from all the pain and impurities that has been sitting inside it.
Choose the healing avenue.
Choose your inner child.
He needs you more than ever .
Come home.
You were cute as a child.
I think this falls into another problem caused by society never training any of us how to actually live. We don't know how to deal with our problems and our scars. So when someone hits an old wound, we lash out. The richer among us can afford psychologists and psychiatrists to try to overcome our faults, depending on just how rich they are. Only a bit well off? We you better not have too many problems! We all should be helped from the time we were children to deal with the problems in life, rather than taught to sit in a chair and piss ourselves while memorizing equations.
Your response is absolute GOLD. It's everything!💜👌 I wish I could like it a thousand times!
I feel the absolute same way.
" society never training any of us how to actually live" yes, yes and triple YES!
My dream is to construct a new society;)
Been kind of chewing on this post for a couple hours. There is a line that stuck with me and twisted me up. The question was asked "Did you let him express that pain or did you suppress it?" Are these actions not one in the same? Expression and suppression both coping mechanisms for pain. Whether we act out or upon the painful triggers or suppress and repress the emotions the underlying damage remains.
I am not an expert, but I wonder if damage like that heals. Like a broken bone, it heals, but it is never the same. Sometimes it is stronger, sometimes it is weaker or it just hurts like hell when the weather changes. The "wound" has "healed" but the scar still has it's impact on our lives.
What really sucks about a lot of this damage is that is changes out DNA. Maybe not in the physical sense, but in our conscious and subconscious. It rewrites pathways, triggers responses, makes us act in ways we can't understand, all from pain and damage that we might never understand.
This post triggered a song from my younger days into my brain. It is a song by the band Tool called Parabola.
Twirling round with this familiar parable
Spinning, weaving round each new experience
Recognize this as a holy gift and celebrate this chance to be alive and breathing
The chance to be alive and breathing
This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality
Embrace this moment, remember
We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion
May not exactly fit, but for some reason it clicked in to my mental CD changer.
I'm honored that you chew on my posts 💚
It's interesting the way you see it as. I meant express as in addressing the pain. I see suppressing it as the ultimate worst coping mechanism as it pushes away any awareness and acknowledgment of the pain. Does that make any sense?:P
Absolutely true what you mention on the change in our conscious and subconscious mind. You put it so well! Crazy that you mention smtg about DNA as I'm reading this dna book right now:) Super interesting:)
Do we always have to carry a wounded child inside of us? Can it heal and grow up? Merge (integrate) with our adult self? Can we abandon unnecessary suffering and embrace intentional suffering? What are the latest theories?
Very great questions! I wish I had some answers for them;)
I love how you differentiate unnecessary suffering from intentional suffering.
The Choice We All Have , But Only a Few Apply It | Jordan Peterson
Hate to say it, (LoL), but I'd bet that there are some much nastier aspects of her psyche than "sweet hurt little baby Sab" that would need integrating into her individuality :-)
2017 Maps of Meaning 08: Neuropsychology of Symbolic Representation
You are embarassing me @twiceuponatime. Please leave us alone. Sabrina is trying to run a class operation here. There's no place for the likes of you in her blog! She is talking about healing hurt little children. Whereas you have probably hurt a child or two.
That African proverb is too true, we love burning down things when we're angry. Someones always setting fire to someone's house, car, school when they don't get there way lol, it's pretty much normal here.
Oh, FYI! You can now use more than 5 tags when posting on busy and I would recommend you keep these 3 tags in mind when creating posts. I think these 3 curation groups would enjoy your content, it will help get you more readers, engagement and rewards.
!COFFEEA 1
you da best ché-ché! thanks so much!!💜💛