I agree, a bad experience can leave you very traumatized, I've been there as well. In my opinion, micro doses are just as effective as larger doses with less risk of worsening your mental health. Also micro doses can be combined with other stress relieving activities such as yoga or meditation to maximize efficiency.
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Couldn't agree more with @the3i1 and @azurejasper. @calaber24p it hit home reading your story about social anxiety and panic attacks. I too from a very young age had those same panic attack experiences and was diagnosed with depression as well. Luckily I was never prescribed Ritalin or any other over the counter drugs, my mom was really against it. My parents got divorced and I was the mediator between them for awhile so it wasn't up to my dad too much. She knew the last thing I needed was a stimulant or depressant and that I just liked to be alone and outside or on the computer most of the time and was cool with that. Years later Skateboarding and getting stoned saved my depression and gave me a reason appreciate anything while I was a young teen.
Later in my 20's it came back bad while I was working in an office everyday. Smoking pot everyday was starting to make my anxiety worse so I tried LSD at 22 and MDMA at 25. One of the best decisions I ever made. For days, weeks, and months after I trip I have the sense or purpose and focus. It's helped me work toward the things I believe in and now its a part of my routine. I try to take 1 or a half tab of LSD and 0.075 mg of MDMA once every month. Kind of works out to be Tripping every other weekend - it's great lol
For your first time I would suggest a tiny bit less of MDMA I described. MDMA can feel much like LSD's Euphoria with out the sense of confusion that can bring anxiety. Any thing under 0.1mgs is within the Non-leathal/toxic level. I prefer to take them alone doing something I'm very comfortable with like watching a movie, drawing, or gaming. Being out side on them is the best if you've got a safe backyard or a friend to partner up with. Any public setting I highly suggest you use the buddy system and never venture out tripping on the street alone! Your far too nice on them and impressionable on them. If your in your house you'll figure out what you want to do pretty fast when it starts to set in.
The biggest thing I learned taking them for the first time was that I never lost a sense of who I was - even at the most intense moments. If anything I learn more and more about myself every time I get to go back to the light ;)