Fart Sniping - A How To

in #life8 years ago (edited)


There are those moments in a person's life when you really need to cut one loose. However, as people, we are not easily open to admitting our passings of gases. Farts are easy to spot when there are very few people. Most of the time, the culprit will simply excuse themselves and laugh.

Then there are situations where someone cuts one and it was so bad that your eyes begin to burn. When you turn around to see who it is, you are surrounded by a dozen potentials, all claiming to not have smelled anything. That is called Fart Sniping.

Fart Sniping is an art. With practice, one could launch pretty good pockets of farts to unexpected people and win the hearts of children everywhere.

Let's get started:

First you will need a few items:

  • A blue solo cup (red won't work for this)
  • A pair of chopsticks
  • baking soda
  • Nine volt battery.
  • Braggs Organic Apple Cider Vinegar with the Mother.
  • A stomach filled with dairy and cabbage.

Fill the blue solo cup with baking soda halfway and place the chopsticks inside, making sure they stick out like antennas. Place the cup near a place where people go to often. With the battery placed flat on a table, balance the cup on top of it. pour enough vinegar, slowly, in the middle of the baking soda, and leave it on the table.

People will begin to gather around the cup. Most of them will be scratching their heads wondering what the battery and chopsticks is for! That is when you go sneak up behind them and cut a really good one (bonus points if you do it near a fat person) and walk away. Sit back and enjoy the ride. The chopsticks is for show, there is nothing the chopsticks are doing, but grab peoples attention. The reason for the blue cup is because people will trust it more than red. The gas will hit the vinegar/baking soda combo and the nine volt battery will actually react to the atmospheric gasses that the smell will be palpable for hours!

Done!

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For sure Mastermind you are !

HAHAHAHA!!!!

this is serious shit, Nebcat!

I'm gonna have to admit, this is the dumbest post I have ever written. 😜