This post is more for me than anyone else. It's good to pour out my inner world some where. It's been a while since I've been on Steemit. A lot has happened in my personal life involving job changes and trying to stop the world from spinning.
These past two years were kind of the opposite of what I thought they'd be from my first steemit post. Things could be worse no doubt, but I feel like I'm drowning in my sleep / work cycle and my apathy.
I feel like I've been on the outside looking in on a ton of awesome stuff. I used to play music, go to shows. I really miss that. I now have the means to record, but it's hard most days to even pick up a guitar. I was one of the first people streaming on DLive, but I couldn't really ride that wave and really get in on what makes the platform awesome. Learning to fence from one of the world's best teachers but I don't feel like I'm doing enough to carry that knowledge forward. I have a wife, a daughter and another baby on the way and they're a great source of meaning... and also a ton of responsibility. There's just a lot of double-edged swords in my life which are both working for and against me.
I don't know. I'm currently typing this on my phone in my car and I need to he getting home from work. I just felt like venting to everyone and no one at the same time. I know I'm not alone here so... I'll hang in there for everyone else who can relate I guess.
Have a good one friends.
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