Definitely something relateable. I visit FB just to keep in touch with the few people that I have made friend with in that community. I try to not read anything because it is too overwhelming. Sounds like time off the grid did a world of wonder for you.
As for 'Dad' mine love alcohol and my brothers more than me. He never wanted a girl, so I had to live with that my whole life until he died 3 yrs ago. I could never turn to him for anything. Thing had gotten so bad when I was 31 he put his hand around my throat. I stood there stared him down and said 'Do it' He actually started to squeeze. I ended the relationship then and their. I don't need that in my life. So I can comprehend trying to deal with a parent with addiction and they would rather have that than you.
Nothing feels that hole. In time what you do with your time takes over and you don't feel that need anymore. Stay strong and true to yourself