I don't think it's as different as we like to think... The bs we get from our parents (I got it too) predisposes us to getting/accepting it from others. Then, we start thinking that maybe it's us... and that we somehow deserve it. (Been there, done that - sadly.)
I'm just so glad that you were out. I do apologize for assuming gender when I started chatting with you, but I know you understood that I meant the same thing. Somehow gender doesn't actually matter when it comes to abuse. I've been emotionally abused by women as well as men, so I've totally been there. :-(
No apologies necessary. :)
Yeah life's kind of a b sometimes
Sorry you've also dealt with it