Hi @adsactly, in my opinion i think it is not necessary to rely on pharmaceuticals, largely cause you have the ability to overcome it. I think the issue might also be the emphasis on your thoughts, making it the be all end all of who you really are. Your thoughts are not you and even more so negative thoughts are definitely not you. Its easy for me to say but I too suffer from depression at times and everyone's circumstance is very different so theres no one answer. I believe to do the things you love and realise how when things are negative in your head, it is your mind actually trying to help you grow out of it. Its like a survival tool, just like the other five senses. So try and keep the momentum and do the things that really matter to you! I wish you all the best and also you can share with me your thoughts, my opinions are always changing and growing :)
Much love
Love this way of thinking about it.