Photo: Will Cornfield, https://unsplash.com/photos/zooszyrsv4Q
For the longest time, I went through life with the feeling that I had little or no control over it.
I embedded other’s beliefs so hard that I truly convinced myself that they belonged to me, and ended up making choices that didn’t fit who I was.
It felt like swimming in the wide ocean; I was trying hard to keep my head out the water, yet the more I tried, the more I sinked.
I felt this way for a while, until one day I stopped kicking so hard.
What felt like falling at first, turned into letting go. Letting go of the negative emotions, of the dark feelings that had taken over. I was allowing things to be, and here I was, suddenly floating back to the surface.
That time, I realised that life is nothing but a constant matter of balancing, an exercise of self-discipline, of holding on and letting go.
When emotions and feelings are constantly trying to pull us in different directions, we can stress out and get carried away, or we can take a deep breath and deal with the fluctuation.
~
Photo: Matheus Ferrero, https://unsplash.com/photos/Aslyu4LksuU
When we are caught in the waves of life, how we can fearlessly chose to let things be?
1. Learn What it Means to "Let It Be"
We often talk ourselves into the belief that "letting things be" equals to "giving up", while letting be is about changing the way we relate to things, allowing ourselves to clearly see what ties us down and what pulls us forward.
We are not letting life happen to us, we are simply living without forcing outcomes or putting too much expectations on things we cannot control.
2. Understand why we hold on to things
The most common reason why we hold on to things is because of the way they make us feel, which is: extremely comfortable.
And when we change our perspective, we are threatening the way we relate to them, pushing ourselves out of our "comfort zone".
Letting things be means acknowledging that there are things we cannot force, and accept to let go of what no longer serves us.
Photo: Simon Maage, https://unsplash.com/photos/KTzZVDjUsXw
3. Stop trying hard, and take a step back instead
The hardest part is probably to convince ourselves that it's ok if things don't work the way we want. How tiring it can be to keep paddling upstream? That might be a hint that we want to take another road to climb up our way. When our mind is not absorbed by the effort, we can step back and get a better understanding of what's the best way to go with things.
4. Change angle to change things
Ultimately, the one secret ingredient for embracing letting go is practicing gratitude.
To let things be without feeling a sense of burden, try to shift your focus on the good things you have right now; look at the steps you have taken to be exactly where you are today. How does that feel?
Be grateful for the chances you have been given, for each deep breath, each smile you are gifted with, are powerful reminders that you are here and alive, and that's all that really matters in the end.
Thanks for reading,
Keep shining!
Kim
This is a really great post. I struggle with holding onto things I shouldn't and this was definitely helpful, thank you!
Thanks @steemitdiaries! glad to know that you can relate. Looking forward to more of your post, I went through quite a few of them and really enjoyed :) keep it up!
I totally agree with you here, I myself am trying to just go with the flow of emotions and not fight and struggle against them. I actively try and recognise and accept things but like a lot of things it takes some time. Sometimes you have to be kicked to the floor for your eyes to be opened but within those hard struggles it can truly change your life for the better!
Keep posting, it's a shame that quality content like this doesn't get more recognition here on Steemit until you have a high reputation, but I trust it get's through to the people who need to see it.
Hey @carface! thanks for your response :) It actually took me a looot of time to embrace this, so I totally agree that it takes time!
Thanks for reposting <3 Indeed, it's great to have some support, especially when you start! Anyway, I will keep it up!
Great writing! Letting go and letting loose and just allowing emotions take control is very difficult for me. I think it may be because I've allowed alcohol to let loose for me that my brain or muscle aren't trained to do it on its own.
I do completely let go in some aspects of my life, but I think its still important to give yourself a slight push into a particular direction instead of going in a free fall though.
Hey MR @chuazm, Thanks for your comment 😺
While talking about letting go, I was thinking at times when we get overwhelmed by feelings and emotions to the point that we can't think clearly, and we keep doing things just because we persuaded ourselves that it's the right way to go.
By letting go, we allow ourselves to grow out of what no longer serves us.
From the other perspective, indeed we can let ourselves go and just follow our emotions! Good hint for another post :))
Thank you @carface for making a transfer to me for an upvote of 1.44% on this post! Half of your bid goes to @budgets which funds growth projects for Steem like our top 25 posts on Steem! The other half helps holders of Steem power earn about 60% APR on a delegation to me! For help, will you please visit https://jerrybanfield.com/contact/ because I check my discord server daily? To learn more about Steem, will you please use http://steem.guide/ because this URL forwards to my most recently updated complete Steem tutorial?
Thanks @carface for promoting this post, that's so kind of you! :) and thanks @jerrybanfield for your vote!
Thanks for sharing, Kim 🙏🏻 That hardest part is to find the actual WHY we hold things