Love words! There is no better way to start the weekend than with a dose of love! <3
twisted seredipidy
days that pass
with speed
but are small eternities
It feels like I've
slept next to you
forever
hours
minutes
days
tick by
marked by your smile
falling away into comfort
shivering, held close to your shifts
playful claws and cruel kiss
contrast and contradictions
Loving you
has made me fearless
Fierce
Reveling when the corners of your lips
curl
beautiful in every
single
way
perfectly flawed
and flawlessly perfect.
the sound of you drifting off
chaos falling away
skin pressed tight, so soft
holding onto you
as all the lights go dim
makes me feel more at home
than any place I've ever been
When I'm in your arms
I know no concept of fear
everything seems much calmer
when you pull me near
you are the peace that
I've been searching for.
Much love, @stitchybitch & @sammosk <3
Very nice, Impressive words. Nice post beautiful presented and explained. detail oriented with nice pics. thank you for sharing this with us, Upvoted
If you mind checking out my blog for latest posts and updats, @kingjan
Great Poem Sammo !!
HolySmoke!
Awesome
Words of love that touch deeply, penetrate the heart and soul, very moving words
Really beautiful.
Off to read some of your other works.
Nice work!
Nice work!
Yess thank you for you! I can feel the actual unconditional love throughout this poem. I can truly tell there is a deep realization of what love is, compared to the "lust" that we often hear about in love's place. Beautiful poetry and thankful you shared it with us here on Steemit!
love will rule the world
You know what? I love this poem! :)
this is great , you just got me with it and i love it ..
good job
Long live @sammosk and his words of inspiration 🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻
So much love <3 This is beautiful!
@originalworks
sammosk!! Thank you, your Post.
WOW! That's a beautiful poem. I feel the words you wrote..Btw, I love your feed and I just followed you. :)
@sammosk indeed love gives us strange emotions we barely have words to describe about
I love your .gif graphic at the bottom of your post. You asked for feedback. I'm happy to share some; hopefully you take it as feedback and are inspired by it. When i was in university my favorite thing to do was explicating my peers poetry, and having my own explicated in return. We'd do a more informal version of the link below, and that is what I'm going to do here. It is brutal, beautiful, and exhilarating. Poetry is written to relate, to change, and to resonate. Your poem did that in a small way for me; I think it can improve.
https://writingcenter.unc.edu/tips-and-tools/poetry-explications/
I ignored the first half of the poem as it was very vague, very abstract, and difficult to follow. I wasn't sure what exactly you were referencing and therefore, I didn't care. The first real image I saw was the included portion in the image. Ahhh! Imagery.
I loved the "shallow little breaths." and the image of the other falling asleep. I had the impression of closeness, of being held. Was the "skin pressed tight" a reference to the speaker and the subject? Or was it a description of the person being held?
My favorite emotion was the stanza about "holding onto you [...] makes me feel more at home than any place I've [..] been." Wow. I just resonated with that portion. I wanted to crawl into my man's arms, drift away into sleep and know, know to the beat of my blood against my bones that space, time, location didn't matter. That this was home! MMMmmm. I loved that part.
Then the magic of the moment became disjarred, lost and torn away. The next stanza/section was cliche. "When I'm in your arms I don't know fear, everything seems calmer when you pull me near." I like the idea of fearlessness in the arms. I've felt it too. How the world can't hurt us when we're hugging; that nothing else matters when I'm surrounded by strong arms. The second two lines ruin it for me. It felt like forced rhyme. I suggest re-working this portion. Can you illustrate this sense of fearlessness with an image? Like a lowered heart rate to match? the slowing pace of everything because of holding? The drowning out of everything else when the subject is in your arms?
I loved the final lines: "you are the peace that I've been searching for." I appreciate the double meaning with "peace/piece" the play on the homophone. Like if you read it aloud it could either mean "peace" or "piece." That was awesome. I'd like it to connect though to something earlier. Like a setting of discordant pieces, or a chaotic world outside demonstrated through some sort of imagery.
Thank you for creating this. I found pleasure in the image and feelings your words awoke in me. Keep writing! Remember, excellent poetry comes from revision.