A friend asked for help with her two babies. She felt overwhelmed. I had an idea for her:
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Hey, D! Here's a tested idea for you.
Jean Liedloff wrote the incomparable The Continuum Concept. Some of her readers came up with "Tribal Days" (article below). Homemakers band together for daily chores, rotating among their houses. Everyone goes to one house on one day to function: to cook, clean, and craft while carrying babies in slings, talk, play, eat, etc. The next day, everyone goes to another house.
The children "cancel each other out" (my phrase) by playing together. They can pitch in a few minutes at a time. They can even help with babies sometimes. Mothers have adult company. They have help to accomplish more than the bare minimum. Everyone gets a change of scenery. They get a natural reminder to behave (!) and a natural opportunity to function more fully.
We don't live in stone-age villages. But we can still arrange some of the personal and economic benefits of one. The moms I've talked to about it love it. It really takes the edge off isolation in single-family homes. Which are nice for some things but not so great for sanity long-term.
Remember, you're not going over to just hang out and talk. Work. Do deep cleaning and projects no has time for anymore. Become mistresses of your fates again. Revive your deeply knowledgeable and cultured selves. Surprise the hell out of your husbands.
It's worth a try. Here's the article about it:
http://www.continuum-concept.org/reading/finding-your-tribe.html