In a relationship and even friendship, not too many things hold as much value as honesty. I have come to realise that your honesty does not only open doors for you and sustains you there, but it can also create mutual respect, trust, and a sense of security. You will agree with me that you are more comfortable to be around an honest person than someone who is not. In your relationship, when you build honesty, your partner will tend to trust you more. The truth is that honesty can bind the people in a relationship together and even enhance more openness, while dishonesty can be the opposite of it.
One of my friends who I had known from childhood recently broke up with her fiance of 1year, and she came telling me what happened. Before he met the guy, the had a daughter who stays with her. She had her when she was in secondary school so she grew with her in her family house before they later relocated to another neighbourhood. In the new neighbourhood, she created the impression that the girl, who is already in junior secondary school is her sister. Looking at the both of them, you would believe that they are siblings and she kept it that way. When she started dating this guy, he also had the same impression because that was what she had created.
Even when I told her to tell him the truth because he will still find out, she was reluctant to tell him. In her words, she was waiting for the right time to tell him and they were dating for almost 1year. The man then ran into one of his friends who knows the lady. When he was telling him about his plans with the girl and then showed him her picture on his phone. Unknowingly to him that he does not know that the man was not aware that the girl is her daughter, he dropped some details towards it and that was it. He expressed shock at how she has kept this simply detail hidden for long. The trust became broken because he thought that there may also be many other things that she is being dishonest about. He left her, not because she had a daughter because he would have accepted both of them, but because she was not honest.
You do not know what you lose by just a supposed little act of dishonesty. In fact, the trust you had built for years and even your relationship can come crashing by being dishonest. But by being honest, you tend to strengthen your relationship and build more trust between you and your partner. There is a level of trust you build in your partner through honesty and they will not difficulty believing anything you tell them. One of the reasons why your partner doubts your words might just be because of past acts of dishonesty. For the sake of building trust, you need to be honest.
One of the enhancers of honesty is transparency. This simply means being plain, open, without hiding the truth or trying to distort it in any form. The truth is that it might not be convenient to be truthful at times, but it is absolutely needed because it will be worthwhile in the future. It is better to stand by the side of the truth and maintaining honesty at all cost even if it may come with temporary discomfort, than to tilt towards lies that will have potentially negative consequences in the future.
It is how you build your relationship that will determine if it will last or not. If you start off on the wrong foot by being dishonest, the after effect will be unwelcoming. But if you start with honesty and make it your foundation, it will create more bonding between you and your partner. It is worth noting that honesty is not only supposed to be in a relationship or friendship but it should be your general lifestyle. For example, in your place of work, let them know you for being honest and truthful and you will discover the kind of doors it can open for you.
Thanks for reading
