If both parties feel lower after the event, then what's the point?
Exactly, and this is usually how it ends. An argument, placing blame, not understanding each others perspective. Yes, it's definitely delusional, and taker's live in their own delusion too! IMO
really bothered me until I started to realize that I didn't actually really give much of a fuck about myself, and began to change that in a non-violent manner.
I feel like we have some similarities sometimes barge. It could certainly be me, creating my own narrative with your words, but I don't think so. It doesn't take you long to compose your thoughts in an organized way with this topic, which leads me to believe you've spent a great deal of time thinking about this already, with your own life, or at least, similar situations, and/or physical/psychological responses. I'm pretty hard on myself at times. I will have to not give as much of a fuck. I think that is a viable solution, for now anyways.