I don't have any advice for your stealth because i'm about to become a father myself next month. But I do know that your kid will understand in the long-term what you are doing. Do you plan on keeping her out of the public school system for a long time?
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Congratulations!
It was literally the best thing that ever happend to me and yeah my wife has mentioned private schools when we can afford it.. so maybe around the jr high level we'll probably let them choose..
Thanks for the caring thoughts!