I really love my two boys, they give my life so much meaning. Sometimes, however, being a boy mom brings some challenging experiences with it. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't trade these two for the world. They can be the sweetest kids there are...but they can also be mischievous and stubborn when they want to be!
Best Practices for Parenting All Boys
Be patient
With boys, you must learn to be patient, or you'll be wanting to pull your hair out every day. My youngest one, especially, has a difficult time listening and following directions. He'd rather continue playing or watching the movie...whatever it is he is doing at the moment.
Both boys will drag their feet on the way to the bathroom for a shower every night. They stall before bedtime, as they don't want to give up their toys and books for sleep. Have patience to make the process go smoother, or else there will likely be a lot of anger and tears getting them to do what you want.
Learn to pick your battles
Not everything that little boys do is worth getting upset over. Spills can be cleaned up without much fuss. Broken possessions can be replaced. These boys, however, are irreplaceable. Keep control of the situation by deciding whether to get angry or simply let it go. It's really up to you how you handle it, but some things are just NOT worth the fight.
Let things go
It's not healthy to hold grudges or onto negative feelings when it comes to parenting boys. They will always do something new to surprise you...and not always in a good way. For example, my oldest is a super picky eater. And it's not just the food, it's the power struggle over cleaning his plate. He likes to debate how many bites he has to eat, whether he has to try a certain side dish, etc.
These days, I just serve him the food that everyone is eating. No more special dinners like we did for a while, because we were afraid he'd starve otherwise. He gets a plate of food and eats however much of it he wants. I have learned to let go of the constant battle to get him to eat. The result is that we have a more enjoyable meal time and he eats more when he's not being forced.
Love the dirt
Let's face it...little boys are dirty! They love to get into the mud, making pies and serving them to you with their friends. They like to dig, stuff rocks in their pockets, and catch frogs after a summer storm. I quickly learned that I needed to be okay with their hands, face, and clothes getting dirty. I just invest in a huge bottle of stain remover and hand sanitizer and let them enjoy their play!
Laugh...a lot
Really, laughter can be the best medicine. It's better than crying over what your boys have done this time!! My two are silly and I have a lot of fun just talking to them, let alone playing. They like to act out, doing impersonations and telling jokes. Of course, there's a bit of "fart" and "butt" mixed in the fun as well....sigh :)
Expect the best hugs
As crazy as my boys are, they seriously are the best huggers. They can really pick up my spirits after a hard day. When my little guy comes over and says, "Mommy, I love you," my heart just melts. My 7 year old doesn't do that as much anymore, since he's busy with school, crafts, friends, video games, and reading. But he will sometimes catch me off guard with a hug too...it's absolutely the best feeling in the world to be loved by little boys!!
Read my Poems Dedicated to my Boys:
Becoming Your Mom
My Youngest Son
More Parenting Posts:
Benefits of Sensory Play for Children
Instilling Confidence Amid Failure in your Child
Helping your Child Cope with Social Anxiety
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I feel all the same goes for girls too ☺
This is solid parenting advice. Your approach is not passive but not strict either. You've managed to find the balance and used it to run a smoother home. I admire your firmness the younger one during time. Most parents let their children dictate their live, telling them what they want and don't want to eat is just the beginning.
Lol. I work with kids on a daily basis so I go to war with them; but its more playful now than it was before. I used to feel like they took my entire arm when I extended only my hand. I'm changing my approach towards handling them and your posts are grately assisting me in this regard.
i have one boys and four daughters,some people thinks that its difficult to handle boys activities as compare to girls but i think its same though i find my boy doing some different activities like he likes different games like bat ball ,love cars,love to climb on windows from the age of 1.5,likes building blocks etc and whole day busy with these activities
very good info for my sister. She wants all boys!
Great advice, I did all those things with my son, he is now a kind, compassionate man with a heart of gold. I remember playing in the mud with my son.
Aw, that was sweet :)
Boys, yeah...
I grew up as the oldest girl in a family of three girls.
I wanted daughters myself, but my first born was a born. I loved him from the first moment. But woah, was he different from anything I was prepared for :D
He had ADHD - but the moment his scout leader told me what a wonderful and QUIET boy I had, I thought, "Is he kidding?" No, he wasn't. But my son was slowly getting over the H part of his ADD.
I'm glad I got a son and a daughter.
I have a boy and I see what you mean. When I look at my nieces, they are so different.
This is such a great article Alliance Playground buddy. The formatting, the information, it's all top notch! Well done on getting the curie!
What a lucky loving household.
From the looks of it, you are a great mom :) Kids these days need good parenting for sure.
enjoy the hugs, they will soon grow up and will find the loving part a little awkward lol
So true, some of these points can be applied to just having kids in general. My girls love the dirt too and they can be super active. Ultimately, kids are such a joy to have around
Great post @keciah. You are a wonderful mother.
I can attest to this, lol! Great advice, we boys can be a handful.
I have 2 princesses. I love them very much too. I understand that parenting all boys is not easy. Certainly, need a lot of patience! Boys are very much active compared to girls.
My boy sometimes is grumpy and nasty, I explain to him if someone else is doing the same to you, how you will feel? Then, he understands that he has to respect others and can't go over the top.
But I'm still working on my patience, he's quite cunning that he at times tests my limit and see how far he can go. If I'm losing my patience, I simply say to him I need a timeout.
Thanks for the advice!
I had 2 boys, I say had because they're grown men today and completely changed personalities from when they were below 12, living on the other side of the Earth too... so sometimes it feels like I once had kids, that are now disappeared. :(
I agree with your advice, but from what I've heard most of it would be equally applicable to girls. My sons were/are both AD/HD like me (or whatever they call it now), and they do say that more boys than girls have it, but I suspect it's simply under-reported in girls, for several complex reasons.
The main difficulty in dealing with AD/HD isn't gender, but simply knowing about it in the first place. People who know nothing tend to try to control it with pure force and violence, and this is of course the absolute worst thing to do.
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Oh my..I can relate with you for the whole time reading this. Every. single. point.
My boys are 3&half and 7 years old. And thr 7 years old is like yours picky and always battle with me how many more mouthful to go. Recently I went to the extreme, either you eat or you leave the table and I am fine with it. That shocked him a little as in the past I would give in to give what he loved to eat. Not anymore. And he learned not to be too choosy and give thanks for food. Aha!
We sure have lots of fun with the boys and yeap with the "fart" and "buttock" and "bum". Lol.
High-5 to you all the way from Malaysia.