I'm having a hard time talking about the Enoch murders.

in #patriarchy2 years ago

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It's absolutely horrible and so triggering.

Basically an LDS father of 5, shot and killed his wife, his kids, his mother-in-law, and himself earlier this week.

I'm also not going to link the KSL story that has so widely circulated, because at least part of the reporting is utterly infuriating. Like 6 times in the story some community member or leader (including law enforcement) is quoted repeating some version of the same claim: we have no idea why this might have happened and we are completely at a loss for anything like motive or what caused this man to do this.
Totally dumbfounded.

Interspersed with reporting of several possibly relevant facts such as: she filed divorce a few weeks ago; her mother was living with her and the kids for extra support; the police had been to the house before; and she had told her attorney several times that she was afraid of her husband.

This was mass murder, and if recent years observing mass killing in the US has showed us any kind of pattern at all, it's that the one thing these men almost always have in common is a history of abusing partners and family members, especially the female ones. They beat, brutalize, and emotionally abuse the girls and women in their lives and very often have actually documented histories of these kinds of domestic violence.

The alleged clueless shock of apparently every single community member who knew the family here is part of the problem. Yes, this man is totally accountable for his choices and no one made them for him, but that doesn't mean that these horrific acts are totally unpreventable.

And the basic, day-to-day, baked-into-the-background, default setting, problem with patriarchy—the problem that is the foundation of all the other more rare but more severe problems—is patriarchy's unwavering commitment to giving men the benefit of a doubt and taking their stories seriously while simultaneously downplaying the stories of girls and women and treating their claims with defacto suspicion.

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