Have you ever felt like the universe was in a playful mood and you were on the ass-end of a practical joke? It must have been my turn to pick the short straw because I cannot help but laugh at how bad my day really could have turned out.
It started off like any other Sunday...
On the Sunday following payday, I do the grocery shopping then head to the laundromat.
Because we only have one car, I had to drop Pat off at work before I could get my chores done.
Shopping's done. Groceries are portioned out and put away. Time to load the car and spend a few hours at the laundromat... But first, I'm going to swing by the storage unit to see if anyone's in the office because I have to get caught up on that bill.
It's gated and there's a pin pad. No problemo. The gate opens and I go in, swinging by my unit to make sure it's unmolested. I pull up to the office and no one's there. sigh
This is where it gets interesting
So I pull up to the gate again and push the 4-digit code , then quickly hop back into my car waiting for the gate to open.
It's not opening.
Hmm... I get out of my car and hit the code again.
NOTHING.
Maybe I put in the wrong code?
I try again.
Again... NOTHING.
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Now let's add some lightning off in the distance and some ground-shaking thunder.
I look up at the sky and she decided not to pour on me...for now.
I try the pin pad again.
NOTHING.
Oh wait... I can't call anyone because my phone is on the charger... at home.
Now I'm eyeballing the gate...with the barbed wire across the top. It's been a few decades since I've climbed fences. This is gonna suck. I walk to the gate and check for signs that it's not electrified. No? Okay, good. So I start to shake the damned thing like a caged gorilla.
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That's when I start laughing.
Not the panicked, maniacal kind of laugh. No. I'm laughing because this is when I realize the universe is screwing with me and it's time to queue in the part when my brain plays out a bunch of scenarios and conversations in my head.
- NEWS FLASH: Woman found dead at the storage unit facility. Naw, too dramatic.
- Crap, I might have to sleep here overnight. That's gonna suck.
- Oh crap, Pat's gonna be pissed when I don't pick him up at work!
- He's gonna want to kill me, then he's going to be worried sick.
- Where are the cops when you need one?
- Why didn't I bring my cellphone?
- Yeah, sure! My fatbody can climb that fence. Let's do it!
- You're wearing flip-flops dumbass.
- This is so stupid!
- Oooh, let's wave down random strangers as they pass! Maybe someone will stop?
At this point I shut off the car. I had no idea how long I was going to be stuck there. No point wasting gas, right?
So there I was, standing at the gate waving madly at passersby. When no one was around I tried to key pad again.
NOTHING.
Then I had the bright idea to find a security camera and do some wild waving and my version of sign language.
Point to self.
Point to gate.
Pretend I'm punching numbers on my hand.
Swipe fingers across my throat for dead.
Wave wildly.
Repeat.
STILL NOTHING.
What the hell are security cameras for if no one's watching them???
So I went back to the gate and continued to flag people as they drove by. A few people slowed down to stare. One person smiled and waved back, bless their idiot little heart.
FINALLY, after about 40 minutes, a woman in an SUV full of kids pulls up. She looks tentative as she rolls down her window.
"Is everything all right?"
"The pin pad doesn't work on this side and I'm stuck behind the gate. Would you please put in the code for me?"
She looks like she might bolt.
I'm wearing my tie-died Minions shirt and I'm smiling at you.
Ignore the crazed look in my eyes.
After a moment's hesitation she gets out of the car and I give her the number.
"I almost didn't stop," she tells me. "You never know sometimes..."
"I am so glad that you did! Thank you very much."
Thank goodness!
I hopped into the car and drove the few feet to cross the threshold to freedom.
Rolling down my window I thank her again and we go our separate ways.
Have I mentioned how much I love Good Samaritans?
At this point I really just wanted to go home. I was free and laundry needed to be done. Maybe - hopefully - the universe will recognize I was a good sport and play her tricks on some other fool.
Follow me on 
Still smiling. I love your luck.
Jeffrey Dahmer smiled too, lol.
i still would have helped you though.
As far as the fence. So many possibilities...
Ramming the fence did come to mind and I had a close call with shoe laces on a fence when I was little but not anywhere near as hung up as the poor dumbass in the middle. LOL Ah memories.
You know I lived in Akron, right? I use to go to a church in Stow, Ohio. We passed his house EVERY SUNDAY as a kid.
hahahahaha im dying :D :D love that!!
https://steemit.com/philosophy/@llange/is-the-dollar-vigilante-wrong-about-the-etymology-of-the-word-government
I think did really well to flag someone down. Sometimes we really do need the help of other people. I ran out of gas on a Florida highway. Standing by the side of the highway, a Big Dude came out of his house where his backyard butted up against the right-of-way. He yelled at me. I went over to the fence and he volunteered a can of gas and I was on my way! Sometimes we just need a little hand -- in your case, just a finger! To punch the keypad! I'm glad you're out! : D
OMG, @haphazard-hstead - that is a very scary situation. First of all, I thought Jersey drivers were bad, but they've got NOTHIN' on Florida drivers. So glad you got help too. I was never so glad to be out of anywhere as I was today! LOL My husband's home now. Just finished reading and he's laughing about it.
It all seems so much funnier when the problem is all over with good results! I wonder what the storage management will have to say about that numeric pad. I'd be cautious about going back in without a test or two!
I'm glad a nice person stopped to help!
OMG, @kenny-crane, if that nice person didn't stop I might still be there. The town shuts down after 6 PM and traffic was getting light! SMH.
Yikes! That sounds terrifying!
You know... I have to laugh because crazy stuff like this happens to me all the time. I think it may be the universe crash course in remaining calm... or maybe I really am insane and don't know any better. LOL
Great post! Different situations happen. You
well done. Not confused!
Indeed. It's how we react that makes the difference. :D
I am laughing with you. This sounds exactly like something that would happen to me. I'm extremely glad that someone helped you. Imagine sleeping in the car? Lol!
I had about 5 minutes of panic before my arms started waving at people. LOL
The people who own the storage facility are going to get a visit tomorrow...and I'm bringing my phone with me this time! hahaha
glad someone stopped XD i would have jumped the fence (And possibly been ripped to shreds by barbed wire but details) because i can. The logistics of getting the number in and car out would have been entertaining though.
We all don't realize how the mobile phone has become integral part of our lives till sh*t happens like that. At least, you made it home safe.
Those days are very annoying, I would have tried to scale the fence too lol :)
Im so sorry for you but this is so fucking funny!!!! i could have been me!! haha dumbest shit happens to me when i leave my phone at home....
RIGHT?!?! It's why I have to laugh. Glad I'm not the only one on the universe's hazing list. LOL
Omg - that IS a pickle. So glad that good soul stopped to help!
Maybe this will make you feel better:
My Dad lives in Florida, too. He was out fishing with two of his buddies. It was a windy day, so they'd go to the head of lake let the wind drive them to the other side, while they trolled along the way. They had two electric trolling motors and a gas powered outboard to make the trip upwind.
It came time to go home, so they tried starting the outboard to go back to the dock. No go. It wouldn't start. So, they tried one of the electric ones. It would take longer with fighting the wind, but it would get them there. Again, no go. Thankful that they had a third motor, they fired that one up. Not.
Three motors, none working. It's getting dark and they're being pushed by the winds towards the far shore.
Oh, I almost forgot. This is the lake where they dump all the 'rogue' alligators caught in the region. Biggest concentration of gators in the state.
Swimming wasn't an option.
Dad DID have a cell phone, tho. Finally, had to breakdown and call the wife. Who called the DNR for a rescue. Who brought a news crew along for the rescue.
The guys got a fine for not having a whistle in the boat for alerting other boaters they were in trouble and they made the evening news.
Only Dad...
ROFLMAO. Oh my goodness. You say "Only Dad..." I say, oh yeah, that would probably happen to me too. All in all, he tried to be a good Boy Scout! Glad he made it out! :D
Hey, at least you didn't make the nightly news... this time.
Haha, sorry @merej99, I tried as long as I could to hold back the laughs... no go! :)
What a lovely story lady! ;D